Spending Pesach in Hotels

Bad bad idea.

Like almost everything in life, don’t knock it till you tried it! i haven’t tried it, but i feel it’s one of those things there is no right or wrong, what’s good for one might not be good for another, and we shouldn’t knock ppl that do go to hotels.

on a side note (i know no one was doing it here) i once saw in a sefer that a lot of times the avaroh of losh hara is worse then the avera done by the guy we’re knocking, something to think about.

The better question is, would any of you attend a Pesach hotel if it were free? Be honest.

If it’s free and they promise I will not gain an ounce, I would go! These hotels are so fattening. The agenda is the food in some of these places. In fact, someone told me she packs two sizes of clothes, her regular clothes for first days, and bigger sized clothing for last days!

We should be dan lkaf zchus that those going would perhaps be doing even less if they didn’t go.

We used to be of the anti-hotel variety. We both always stayed home, and while it was hard (helping with all the cleaning and other preparations) we received some very valuable chinuch about Pesach, and the proper way to approach mitzvos in general. We’ve always felt that doing things the convenient way really causes one to miss out on certain important aspects of the chag. I haven’t made Pesach myself yet. In two years of marriage, this is going to be the third one- the first was spent with my parents, second with hubby’s. Well, as it turns out, I’m due smack in the middle of Pesach. It’s pretty difficult for me to move around at this point and neither set of parents is particularly interested in having to wait on me hand and foot while I lay on the couch like a big lump (not to mention, my in-laws are out of town and traveling that far in my condition is problematic). This would be the first time that my mother would have to do things without me. So yes, this year we are going to a hotel (us and my parents). It feels kind of weird and we’re a little nervous about the new experience. I still feel that it’s better to do it yourself, but at least I now know that there are legitimate reasons why sometimes you might not be able to. I, for one, am now very glad that the hotel option exists.

chesedname, like anything else in life, the harder you work on something the more you will enjoy it when your all done. so in a way staying up till 3:00 in the morning is cheirus

There is a difference between someone going to a hotel due to an extenuating circumstance, rather than someone going to have a blast, vacation, or get away from the Yom Tov routine.

Why must there always be a discussion of whether what other people do is ok? If you prefer Pesach at home, that’s fine. If you go to a Hotel, enjoy. Why the preoccupation with what everyone else is doing?

very good volvie! for once i agree with u!

J-a-g: Can you rather come to my house to point out my errors please? Whilst smiling is a tzadik, I have room for improvement. And I’d love to have someone point out all the areas where I can improve! (Since I could miss noticing some areas myself.)

It has nothing to do with “putting people down” nor is it doing anything of the sort. Having a discussion on what is right and wrong has everything to do with Kol Yisrael areivim ze lazeh. Whether the discussion concerns hotels, shaitel, vacations, hechsheirim, college, tefilin, concert, rallies, or hat and jackets. Whereas there IS a Torah viewpoint on all these issues, there is every reason to be concerned for each and every Jew. One for another.

And that is the point.

I would never criticize anyone’s decision about where to spend Pesach. I would merely like to raise the following question.

With so many people out of work, and people needing to take from Tomche Shabbos to put food on the table, wouldn’t it be tremendous if every person took the thousands of dollars they spend on a hotel and gave it to tzedakos that need it desperately?

Wouldn’t this hasten the arrival of Moshiach?

Yanky, your point is a good one. BUT – no one, myself included, has the right to decide how someone who has the money, should spend it – provided that they ARE also giving tzedaka. Yes, in an ideal world, people would forego certain luxuries and give to the poor so that they would also have a nice and equitable life. But wait – is that not SOCIALISM? Not everyone has money, and many people who are poor ARE getting outside financial help. But we cannot decide for someone else where he should put his money.

People who go away, do so in order to avoid the stress and work of Pesach preparations. I personally do not find it stressful, and I enjoy it. Pesach is bar none, my favorite yom tov (no bees buzzing around me while I eat lunch).

When I was first married, and for at least 12 years thereafter, I spent every single yom tov by my parents (in-laws were not frum, so that was out). I was not on vacation, though, because I cooked alongside of my mom O”H, and my husband and I turned their house over every Pesach, and kashered the stove and oven. I was never a “guest,” nor did I expect to be treated as such. After I felt it was too much for my parents to have us come to them, (and way too hard packing up a family of seven), I invited my parents to move in with me for the week, each year. They spent most of yom tov with us, and the last days usually by one of my siblings. It was the notion of spending yom tov with my parents, cooking with my mom as always, sitting together before yom tov making the geilte fish, charoses and the maror, bensching licht with her, that made my Pesach. Those memories resonate with me in ways that going away to a hotel could not possibly do so, no matter what anyone else who GOES away might feel. And my kids have the memories of helping me bake for yom tov, of doing the same things with me that I did with my mom, and it just isn’t the same when you are not home. OK, now I need a Kleenex.

Going into Golus to celebrate cheirus really doesn’t make sense.

You know, as I give the matter a bit of thought, it seems to me that the authentic Jewish thing to do *is* to go to a hotel.

After all, in the times of the Beis HaMikdash, unless you lived in Yerushalayim, you went away for Pesach *every* year. 🙂

(No, I’m not really advocating that people go away — but let’s quit knocking those that do.)

The Wolf

With so many people out of work, and people needing to take from Tomche Shabbos to put food on the table, wouldn’t it be tremendous if every person took the thousands of dollars they spend on a hotel and gave it to tzedakos that need it desperately?

But hey, why stop with Pesach hotels?

Wouldn’t it be better if everyone bought a cheap esrog and gave more to Tomche Shabbos? Wouldn’t it be better if, instead of a $25 bouquet of flowers for Yom Tov I bought a $5 bouquet and gave the balance to Tomche Shabbos?

The Wolf

A nicer Esrog and beautifying Yom Tov are mitzvos themselves. Shpatziring in a hotel is not.

Smilingsfriend, what chiddushim were you hoping would come out of this thread?

And yes, rich people might choose a simpler Pesach and give the rest away, but face it, rich people do things differently. What’s understated for a rich person will still be way above my standard of living. And that’s not a bad thing. A)We are none of us Robin Hood and B)a somewhat higher standard of living may well engender more generosity. There’s a famous story of a wealthy man who ate very, very simply, and was told off by a rav/rebbe, who told him that when a poor man comes and says he’s hungry so nu, he’ll share his meal of black bread and herring, or worse, say if I with my money can manage on this and I’m the gvir, he shouldn’t need more on his bread than a little oil. The wealthy man was told on the contrary, he should live on a higher standard so that he could better appreciate how much the poor are missing.

Go after pesach. From what I’ve heard and read, its virtualy impossible to have the hotel keep the same level of kashrus you would provide yourself at home when they are catering to a huge crowd. Mistakes happen.

No, they don’t serve bread by mistake. But bishul issues, wrong cleanser being used, a “not as frum guest” bringing in his own food to the meal, and using the house dishes (which then go back to the kitchen and into the dishwaher with the other 499 plates, which then comes back out as YOUR plate).

Besides, no matter where you go, you are looking a staggering cost of $1500 – $2500 per person. All this to fress, day and night? Is that what Hashem took us out for, to be his chosen people?

Go after Lag bomer without the guilt and almost definite kashrus pitfalls.

“Pesach is a traditional holiday that has been celebrated for many years with family. What does everyone think about the idea of going to a hotel and killing the whole tradition of spending it at home?”

This question is faulty from the get go. Why cant people further the tradition of celebrating with family, in a hotel? Extended family? Well, not everyone is at home, are they? Does the entire extended family live under the same roof? By definition, people are already away from home. Once leaving their home to further the tradition of celebrating with family, people have chosen to celebrate under the roof of a hotel instead of a private home.

Pesach Night in Mitzrayim, about midnight

the Destroyer kills the firstborn mitzrim and passes over the Jews.

the Jews have “painted” their doorposts and lintels with the blood of the egyptian “dieties”, the sheep. an act that cannot help but produce intense hatred of the Jews. but this is what Hashem commanded.

the Jews are told to stay in their homes the Seder night, and to lock their doors.

WHY?

the Destroyer (or Hashem Himself) needs blood to locate the homes of the Jews?

The Destroyer cant get into a home with closed doors. the doors of the mitzrim didnt protect them.

locking the doors? again, to keep the Malach out?

on this night, Hashem is readying His People, His Holy Nation, chosen to be His, a separate People, who will live by the Torah and nothing else but the Torah. He commands they shall do the very act (the slaughtering and brazen application of the blood of their ‘diety”) which will cause the Mitzrim to be repelled and withdraw from them. to separate from the nations, to close and lock their doors to complete and symbolize their desire for separation. to remain in their homes where a Great Kedushah would descend upon them on this first Seder Night.

and every Seder Night since then, a great Kedushah descends upon the Jewish People and upon Jewish Homes, the family Battai Mikdoshim. those who are ready for it, who want nothing but Hashem, their Father, to take them as His, and who take Hashem as the only thing they desire, they will experience the Kedushah.

youre right gavra

for whatever reason

if they have to go, they have to go

people making that decision though should just be aware that its not the best situation. if it can be avoided that would be best.

Volvie wrote:

“Kol Yisrael areivim ze lazeh. We are each responsible for one another.”

We are also required to be dan l’kaf zechus. If my fellow Yidden spend Pesach at a hotel I assume they have a good reason for doing so. I assume they take precautions to avoid the pitfalls that might arise.

EDITED