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My kids are chollishing to go to the Great Parade on Lag Ba’omer, but it’s during yeshiva time. They take their work seriously, and I would really like to give them this break, but I am afraid that it may give them the wrong message. What should I do?
I am afraid that it may give them the wrong message.
You’re probably right.
Why don’t you make sure they understand that this is a one-time experience and you wouldn’t usually sacrifice their learning for it?
Speak it over with their principal.
As ayalla said , explain that this is a one time thing.I have been to the great parade last year and for younger kids it really is meaningfull. their are beutifull floats that the local yeshivas make , depicting different mitsvot and entertainment.All kosher. My kids loved it and cant wait.Hopefully the weather will cooperate. Last year it was scorching hot
Family simchos are another story.
There kids that grow up having been told that school is too important to miss when a family simcha occurs will ignore family in favor of their profession.
Which “wrong” message exactly will this give them?
what time does it start, i was having the same questions
F they are kids who are always in school and rarely take mental health days, then yeah why not?! But if they miss school often then I’d say no. Let them go and enjoy themselves for a day. They can make up the work I’m sure but go on, let them enjoy. Its not like they are missing school to go to a sporting event, its to go to a lag baomer parade! Have fun and enjoy the day!
Let them go. They will feel good about themselves. more important then the few hours of learning, they will feel that their parents love them and care and want them to be happy.
If this would happen weekly it it is a whole different ballgamme
If its boys, they shouldn’t miss Torah studies; if its girls, you have more flexibility.
Make up the 2 hours learning they would miss and take them to the parade.
Convince the principal to take the whole school on a Lag B’Omer outing to the GREAT PARADE!
BSD, from what I can remember of school, they also celebrate Lag B’omer and it is usually a trip day, so I doubt there will be much learning. There will be much anticipation for the trip but very little “zitz fleish” for learning or anything else. So I think it is fine to trade the school trip for the Big Parade.
bitul torah, issur deoriasa!!
Go after school
unfortunately it is over by the time they are finished school.
Which “wrong” message exactly will this give them?
That fun and games is more important than learning. For that matter, that fun and games is more important than responsibility. A student should be taught that attendance is mandatory and that (s)he should only take off for something urgent. The Great Parade is not urgent.
Of course, if this particular child has a specific need, that might be different. I’m generalizing, for a normal, well adjusted child.
tough one!
The lesson is FAMILY time is important. It is NOT wrong to teach kids how important it is to spend time together.
The lesson is FAMILY time is important. It is NOT wrong to teach kids how important it is to spend time together.
Then why the Great Parade during yeshiva hours? Let them go to a park after yeshiva is over and spend time with each other, instead of taking off learning time to spend “quality time” with Uncle Moishy and MBD.
Wondering How will the teachers and Menehalim react? How about asking in advance? Are you telling your kids your principal and teachers are not all that smart? Is conforming with school policy & regs really so unimportant?
DY well said!! The Great parade is not “Family time”.
It is NOT wrong to teach kids how important it is to spend time together.with several hundred other kids being entertained/ enlightened by whoever is on the podium.If you think they need a day off, give it to them. No one should question a parent’s call in a case like this
But, IMHO, you should take them to the one in BP.. (the Twins will be there!)
you should allow your children to go. have them do some sort of schoolwork lesson to cover teh time that they miss from class.
make sure tehy know that leaving class early does not mean they can ”get away” without the lesson or learning. they are jsut shifting the time.
bitul torah, issur deoriasa!!
And yet, here you are, posting on this forum.
The Wolf
And yet, here you are, posting on this forum.
A. She’s a girl, so there is no bitul Torah for her.
B. Even if it were, two wrongs don’t make a right.
C. She’s being facetious.
A. She’s a girl, so there is no bitul Torah for her.
She is? I did not know that. My apologies.
The Wolf
(Note: I still disagree with the idea that any time away from learning is completely and utterly forbidden.)
If you think they need a day off, give it to them. No one should question a parent’s call in a case like this
If they “need a day off”, give it to them now, why wait until next week?
Who is this Miss Yeshiva?
What does she do?
BSD:
You made the right decision and for the right reasons.
Hatzlocha!
There was a “Chinuch Roundtable” in the Yated regarding this a while back; the panel was mixed.
BSD:
why don’t you present the dilemma to your kids and see if they are willing to “make up” the lost learning time. Just a thought.
How much time do the boys spend learning per week?
How much time does the Family spend together (Not on Shabbos ) per week?
Lag B’Omer was always a traditional day of fun for the kids in Yeshivah. We always went on school trips, had picnics, games etc. Part of our Jewish heritage is the recogntion of the simcha of this day and celebration of that simcha. Ivdu es Hashem b’simcha.
BSD- I think you are doing the right thing and I am sure that if you explain it to your children in the right way and you show them that it was a big decision for you and you thought about it and did nto just push away the fact that they wanted to go i think that will be easier for them
I have a question on this, is Lag Bomer a real holiday or not?
If we acknowledge its a Yom Tov then exceptions should be made, you should take them to the parade letting them know it’s a one time deal and all schoolwork missed must be made up.
Family time is NEVER counter-productive.
A parent can never spend too-much time with the kids.
OP – You said you would TRY to compensate. Something will come up, it always does. Spend family time NOW. you do not get it back
Family time is NEVER counter-productive.
A parent can never spend too-much time with the kids.
I don’t know about that. I’ve been told by people that every minute I spend with my kids and exposing them to my values is corrupting their neshamos irreparably. I’ve also been told (on these very boards) that by playing games with my kids (as opposed to learning with them every available minute) I am wasting their time.
The Wolf
maybe your kids will have a good influence on you:)
Nah. I’m completely and utterly incorrigible.
The Wolf
Taking a day off (or even part thereof) of Yeshiva, for an extracurricular activity, is the purest form of Bitul Torah. You are actually scheduled — no less your regular schedule — to learn Torah, and throw the opportunity away??
discuss it with their Rebbe
discuss it with their Rebbe
It certainly couldn’t hurt. HaleiVi earlier suggested to speak it over with the principal. That would also be a good idea.
To quote BSD, though, “I can’t imagine that the school would allow them to take off. “
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