sheva brachos intros/jokes

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  • #614337
    Being Real
    Participant

    Im speaking at a sheva brachos help!Need a good joke or funny story for the start of my speech please no corny marriage jokes or mother in law jokes Thanks

    #1044115

    a prince and princess who just got married r sitting in a beautiful carraige together when suddenly the horse stops moving.

    “excuse me a second honey” says the prince. he gets out the carraige, whips the horse, and says “thats one!!”

    he gets back into the carraige, excuses himself and resumes talking to his new wife.

    the horse stops again and the story repeats itself. he goes out and tells the horse “thats two!!!”

    the same thing happens again and this time the prince gets out and says “that was three!!!” and he shoots and kills his horse!

    this time when he gets back in the carraige his horrified wife of one hour turns to him and says “honey, why did u do that? the poor horse!!

    the prince turns to her and says “honey, that was one!!!!!”

    lol i heard this at a sheva berachos and it got a major laugh

    #1044116
    apushatayid
    Participant

    You can quote the gemara that says one who enjoys a seudas chassan and is not misameach the chassan violates 5 “kolos”. You can explain that the host in an infinite act of kindness put you up to speak to ensure nobody has any enjoyment.

    #1044117
    Patur Aval Assur
    Participant

    apushatayid:

    Ayen Ben Yehoyada on that Gemara.

    #1044118
    Patur Aval Assur
    Participant

    Correction – it’s in the Benayahu.

    http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=21190&st=&pgnum=11 (bottom of first column)

    #1044120
    barlev
    Participant

    ??? ???? ???? ??????? ????? ????? ??? ??? ????, the question is asked, what was so special there?

    The answer is, there were no speeches

    #1044121
    potpie
    Member

    Sketch and a half, I’m not sure I understand your joke. Can you please explain it?

    #1044122
    Letakein Girl
    Participant

    I like Barlev’s joke.

    😀

    #1044123
    oomis
    Participant

    The answer is, there were no speeches”

    And no mother-in-law… 😛

    #1044124
    oyyoyyoy
    Participant

    PAA intrstng but not probable nowadays

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