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- This topic has 34 replies, 16 voices, and was last updated 11 years, 10 months ago by Curiosity.
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December 9, 2012 11:51 pm at 11:51 pm #607343reggirlMember
Hi. Im a 22yr old frum girl looking for a boy who is learning and will goto college or someone who is already in college.
Anyone know of shadchanim who know of these type of boys? regular frum boys who plan on earning a parnassa
Thanks
December 10, 2012 1:30 am at 1:30 am #918222147ParticipantJWed [formerly Frumster] & Orthodate
December 10, 2012 2:51 am at 2:51 am #918223CuriosityParticipantI recommend SYAS. I am that type of boy you mentioned, and I’ve found frumster/jwed to be geared more to the modern orthodox crowd… at least for our age group. After a few months, I’ve still had no luck finding a frum girl between 20-25 on there that fits what I’m looking for. Ive found there is a very sparse selection of normal, frum, college educated, reasonably good looking girls on there for me so I switched to SYAS. You might have more luck as a girl though; I don’t know how many guys are on there. It wouldn’t hurt to make a free profile just to take a look.
December 10, 2012 4:07 am at 4:07 am #918224hudiParticipantWhat’s SYAS?
December 10, 2012 4:38 am at 4:38 am #918225CuriosityParticipantSaw you at sinai. … .com
December 10, 2012 4:50 am at 4:50 am #918226reggirlMember@Curiosity: thanks for your advice. I made a profile at SYAS a while back, but i found the matches they came up with weren’t was I was looking for . A regular frum boy who is going/will go to college is a very hard find. I am an educated girl (accountant) and i need someone intelligent (like street smart) and frum…a very hard find..
January 6, 2013 6:28 am at 6:28 am #918228heckfrozeover2000Member@reggirl there are plenty of educated boys out there. These website are a waste of time in my opinion so just look out for some good shadchen etc…
January 6, 2013 10:06 am at 10:06 am #918229CuriosityParticipantreggirl – Apologies; I just noticed your reply. Maybe it works better for me because I’m exactly what you described, but I seem to be getting good suggestions with it – even real dates. If you were a paying member, did you try switching up your shadchanim? I have several friends who are similar to me; nice, normal, frum boys who are going/have been to college. Maybe you should look at “out of towners” if you haven’t already?
January 6, 2013 7:14 pm at 7:14 pm #918230147ParticipantThese website are a waste of time
This easily got to be the absolute biggest Shekker & lie I have ever come across in this coffee room.
I got married thru one of these websites, so please heckfrozeover2000 recall your very false assertion.
January 6, 2013 10:17 pm at 10:17 pm #918231Torah613TorahParticipantStreet smart and intelligent are not the same thing.
January 7, 2013 12:34 am at 12:34 am #918232OneOfManyParticipantThat’s a very narrow definition of intelligence you have there…
January 7, 2013 3:40 am at 3:40 am #918233shadchan613MemberI am involved in shidduchim and could try and think of guys for you.
January 7, 2013 4:57 am at 4:57 am #918234left to writeMemberHi reggirl. I have a young man I think you’d like to meet. He’s in his early-to-mid 20’s,is learning and will go to college. He’s intelligent (like street smart) and frum. He’s looking for a normal, frum, college educated, reasonably good looking girl.
Hi curiosity. I have a young lady I think you’d like to meet. She’s about 22 year old, she’s frum & educated (she’s an accountant) and is looking for an intelligent,frum, normal guy who is learning and will go to college.
Kinderlach, I think it’s worth looking into.
Which moderator will be the Shadchan to exchange contact info off-line?
January 7, 2013 6:47 am at 6:47 am #918235CuriosityParticipantHaha… thanks for the consideration left to write, but I don’t think relying on the CR mods is proper hishtadlus (we don’t rely on open miracles). Besides, it’s not appropriate to turn the CR into a shidduchim website; our anonymity keeps this place turning.
January 7, 2013 7:46 am at 7:46 am #918236mewhoParticipantyw shadchanim dot com…..lol
January 7, 2013 10:58 am at 10:58 am #918237SabziMemberI think lefttoright has a good idea here.
January 7, 2013 3:18 pm at 3:18 pm #918238WIYMemberWhy hasn’t anyone started a shidduchim forum?!
January 7, 2013 5:18 pm at 5:18 pm #918239reggirlMember@curiosity: ya i tried switching shadchanim but the matches were pretty off…i guess it works for some and not others..i didnt really go out with out of town boys because i dont know of shadchanim- u have anyone i can call?
January 7, 2013 5:19 pm at 5:19 pm #918240reggirlMember@shadchan613: thanks. so how do we get in touch?
January 7, 2013 6:20 pm at 6:20 pm #918241frummy in the tummyParticipantleft to write – Do you have any references?
jk, but it does kinda seem like a good idea to have SOMETHING available to posters who could match up. If both parties aren’t worried about their own anonymity, why not? These forums often bring out the essence of people and the way they see the world (although perhaps this is only because of the anonymity, thereby negating my point) without any of the fluff that comes with meeting in person. The ‘in-person’ aspect of a relationship is important, and posting here certainly doesn’t prove a pair of people’s ability to have good conversation with one another, but why not have one more way that people can meet each other be available?
January 7, 2013 6:38 pm at 6:38 pm #918242CuriosityParticipantReggirl, I do have a shadchan in mind, but I don’t think he’d appreciate me posting his private contact information on the internets 🙂 Best of luck to you though!
January 7, 2013 7:53 pm at 7:53 pm #918243reggirlMemberu think u cud email it to me- ?
January 7, 2013 8:35 pm at 8:35 pm #918244CuriosityParticipantI don’t know… It’s probably not smart for you to post your email address on a public forum- that’s like asking to get attacked by spammers and hackers. Also, what are you going to tell him? That you got his information from someone on the YWN Coffee Room? I would vouch for you, but that would be worthless because, as much as I trust you are who you say you are, I don’t have any proof as to the validity of your identity to present him with. The whole thing might get extremely awkward… I dunno… what do you think?
And have you tried free websites like ZivugZone?
January 7, 2013 9:06 pm at 9:06 pm #918245left to writeMemberKinderlach:
You don’t have to post your personal info to the public. The mods have (or can be given) your e-mail addresses to be passed on only to each other. Then the interaction is all up to you (initial contact, follow-ups, etc.). If you would feel more comfortable having a 3rd party involved, again OUT OF THE CR, then authorize the mods to send e-mails to your mutually agreed upon 3rd party/shadchan & let him/her take it from there (not that I’m looking for shadchanus, but I would volunteer to facilitate your efforts). This is not called relying on a miracle, and considering some of the other uses of the CR, announcing a CR shidduch would be very exciting.
January 7, 2013 9:40 pm at 9:40 pm #918246CuriosityParticipantLtW, I don’t mind, but I think the mods do not do that… can we summon an official to decide the ruling? What’s the CR policy? I’m pretty sure it’s in the rulebook somewhere…
January 7, 2013 10:02 pm at 10:02 pm #918247reggirlMember@curiosity: i wouldnt post my real email address- and after you send me the info ill delete the account-…i appreciate the gesture to vouch for me (which as you say is weird considering we have no clue who each other are..)- but shadchanim get calls all the time from random girls mothers…those numbers float around…but its totally fine either way….
I just eard about zivugzone from my friend i made a profile..bt didnt look into it yet….
January 8, 2013 12:59 am at 12:59 am #918248CuriosityParticipantReggirl – I hear… that might work. I can give you his email address for you to reach him at. I guess you could try that. I’m going out soon though so I won’t be able to post until later tonight. As for ZivugZone, I personally haven’t had too much luck with it, but as you say, it may be different for different people. Good luck!
January 8, 2013 1:02 am at 1:02 am #918249SabziMemberAny mods around to advise what to do?
January 8, 2013 5:05 am at 5:05 am #918252reggirlMemberso if anyone has any shadchanim that wouldnt mind if you posted their # or email online please post. Thanks
January 8, 2013 8:32 pm at 8:32 pm #918253popa_bar_abbaParticipantWhy don’t you just post his name, and everyone can find his contact info in the phonebook or whatever.
As I’ve said before: I support the CR policy of not facilitating exchanges of contact info.
January 8, 2013 9:10 pm at 9:10 pm #918254oomisParticipantI wouldn’t say the websites are a waste of time, BUT some of the shadchanim there, like shadchanim in other venues, sometimes try to redt shidduchim that for specific reasons are really not shayach to the person, because they just KNOW they know better than the client who has signed up for the site.
I personally know at least ONE shadchan on a well-known site, and in my humble opinion she should not be matching up sox, much less actual people. I mean no disrespect to her, but true is true. So how on earth did she ever get to become a shadchan? I think there should be a better screening process for them, so this would not happen. This does not minimize the massive efforts of shadhchanim who are truly dedicated to helping couples meet and marry. They deserve all the kudos we can give.
January 9, 2013 6:41 am at 6:41 am #918255sarahleahMemberPLEASE..be careful..there is a chasidishe” yungerman” who is a rapist going on all these sites looking for unsuspecting victims. He used to be a michanech, looks VERY frum, seems SO nice, personable, big baal chesed, knos alot of torah, very very smart,seems so intelligent and torah learned, he slowly befreinds you, helps you..then WAMMO..he has you in his grip. He has molested so many women and children….be careful PLEASE
January 9, 2013 4:40 pm at 4:40 pm #918256CuriosityParticipantReggirl, I spoke to my shadchan for you, and he said he is currently not taking on any more new people because of certain things that are keeping him extremely busy in his personal life right now. Sorry.
January 9, 2013 4:54 pm at 4:54 pm #918257popa_bar_abbaParticipantreggirl: there are plenty of shadchanim who know plenty of guys like that. If curiousity’s shadchan is too busy, he is probably not a very big shadchan anyway.
Just ask around for them. I think there have even been long lists posted on this site in the past.
January 9, 2013 6:36 pm at 6:36 pm #918258CuriosityParticipantPBA is right, there are surely other options. And I wouldn’t call my shadchan big (though he has lost count of how many shidduchim he’s made), but he is close with several huge full-time shadchanim and people of influence that he networks with regularly. Wishing you best of luck reggirl!!!
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