Seminary Rejection

  • This topic has 65 replies, 39 voices, and was last updated 11 years ago by 36.
Viewing 50 posts - 1 through 50 (of 66 total)
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  • #610453
    higuys
    Member

    Hi, thanks for reading this post and I hope you can reply with your thoughts to it! I was meant to be going to seminary in israel this year- starting tomorrow!!! On Tuesday I got a rejection letter… Someone had called up the sem about me, resulting in my exclusion! I managed to prove to the sem that the subject of the phone call was not an issue at all and totally wrong but the rav of the seminary I was supposed to be going to would not budge from his decision not to accept me or even give me a trial period. Most sems start this week, if they haven’t started already last week. Does anyone know any sems (in israel) that are willing to take late acceptances?

    #987279
    the-art-of-moi
    Participant

    omigod, thats awful!!! you have my heartfelt sympathy! i have contacted someone about this and will hopefully have some sems for you to check out soon. i cant guarente it but i am trying! i wish you much hatzlachah in life. keep your head up!

    #987280
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    I’m sorry that happened to you.

    #987281
    Torah613Torah
    Participant

    I managed to prove to the sem that the subject of the phone call was not an issue at all and totally wrong but the rav of the seminary I was supposed to be going to would not budge from his decision not to accept me or even give me a trial period.

    That’s really hard. On the positive side, a seminary that would treat a prospective student like that may not have been the best place anyway. I hope you do find a place where you are happy for this year. Hatzlacha!

    #987282
    the-art-of-moi
    Participant

    i find the contrast between my and popas posts very amusing.

    #987283
    Mr Sfardi
    Participant

    Thats awful!!! I wouldnt even bother to go to seminary at this point.If thats how they act, why would you want to be with them. Why dont you start college early instead?

    #987284
    oomis
    Participant

    A place that would listen to loshon hara, and not care about your side of the story, does not appear to have the type of hashkafa that I would want to impart to my own children. You may have dodged a bullet. There are many seminaries. Hatzlacha rabbah in finding one that is right for you.

    #987285

    i am so sorry that had to happen to you. try pninim!they accept late!!you should defiantly try pninim!!

    #987286
    123jew
    Participant

    If you really want to go to seminary how about try getting into pninim as far as I know pninim takes late acceptances. Also there’s a huge mix of girls in pninim.

    #987287
    batseven
    Participant

    Im shocked!

    That is truly terrible that someone would do something like that, and I am really sorry for you.

    Unfortunately I do not know the slightest thing about seminaries so I can’t really be of much help.

    But Iyh Hashem has a wonderful year planned ahead for you, and I hope you see exactly what it is very soon!!

    Hatzlacha Rabah

    #987288
    🍫Syag Lchochma
    Participant

    i find the contrast between my and popas posts very amusing.

    I find Popa being sorry about something seminary related amusing

    #987289
    chaya.esther
    Member

    Just go to Neve…If you say youre a baalas tshuva they’ll take you in all year round

    #987290
    TryingMyBest
    Member

    I think Halichos Bais Yaakov might have space. But I would move quickly. Good luck!

    #987291
    kollel_wife
    Participant

    That is really horrible news. Keep strong.

    One piece of advice – if you can have someone you rely on, have them call the new places you’d like to apply to, on your behalf. Sometimes an advocate can accomplish what the person himself cannot.

    #987292
    higuys
    Member

    Hi all thanks so much! I’ve tried pninim they are completely full. As well are all Beis Yaakov sems at this point.

    #987293

    I’m so sorry about this! that’s really upsetting and not nice! I’m not really familiar with Beis Yaakov sems,so I don’t think I can help but I hope you find the right place for you really soon!

    #987294
    nishtdayngesheft
    Participant

    I feel bad for you, it is terribly disappointing.

    Oomis,

    Interesting comment. Are you not doing exactly that yourself? Granted, no individual has been named, but you are passing judgement when hearing only one side of a story.

    #987295
    goodbye1
    Member

    maybe try azamra? or be’eros?

    #987296
    goodbye1
    Member

    you can go to neve (and maybe some of its affiliates?) all year EVEN IF YOU’RE NOT A BA’ALAS T’SHUVA

    #987297
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    Davening for you!!!!! Hope you find a spot!!!

    #987298
    YITZCHOK2
    Participant

    Have your parents call your Rav and have your Rav make some calls to seminary’s and let them know how you deserve to be in a good seminary and he might be able to open some doors for you. Unfortunately we live in such a ridiculous society where one stupid call gets your life turned upside down. Being a Rov is a full time job nowadays because stupidities like this.

    #987299
    Feif Un
    Participant

    Was the seminary you were applying to a Beis Yaakov seminary? Is that the only type (hashkafa wise) that you’re looking into?

    #987300
    zahavasdad
    Participant

    I do blame the seminary here, not that she was rejected, but that she was rejected at a very late date.

    If the seminary did not want her they should have told her last March or April leaving OP enough to apply somewhere else

    #987301
    nishtdayngesheft
    Participant

    ZD,

    Yet you have no clue at all what happened, and you are ready to pass judgment.

    It is great to be able to make such determinations without a clue.

    Hmmmm.

    #987302

    wow!!! that is awful, I am so sorry that happened to you! yes, try Neve they are fantastic or the new MEOR that opened up on Neve campus. If nothing works out there are great seminary/colleges in the states. I know a couple in five towns area/brooklyn. Good luck!

    #987303
    oomis
    Participant

    Nisht – I think I was careful in my wording, however you might possibly have a point. But I also heard the pain of a Jewish child, and that tends to blind me to the unknown “other side.” So I will amend what I said earlier, to say, IF someone were to do that to a child, with no just cause, and not even allow the child to defend him/herself, I would not want that school’s hashkafa being imparted to my children, and the child so treated will have dodged a bullet, IMO.

    #987304
    truthsharer
    Member

    Take the person who called on you to Beis Din.

    #987305
    a frum teen
    Participant

    – Taking the Rav to a beis din is a good idea, as per halacha I dont know if what he did was permissible. Not to mention it might set a nice precedent for other girls who were asked to leave for reasons that they cannot explain or defend.

    – while a more extreme option, look into the different programs of nevei – not all of the progams are for beginners and it may give you a new lease on Judaism/life that you would definitely not get from your standard beis yakov sem.

    #987306

    Hi first of all I feel terrible for your predicament. It’s really terrible that the Rav won’t take you back. But unless you are set on going to a bais yaakov seminary you should try Tomer Devorah. It is a great school and has an amazing staff. Hope this helps!!

    #987307
    zahavasdad
    Participant

    Unless OP committed some crime there was unlikely nothing that wasnt known last spring that wasnt known now.

    If there was concerns last spring they should have been said so last spring.

    A last minute Disinvite is totally wrong

    #987308
    amichai
    Participant

    so sorry to hear this happened to you. stay strong. you should have a very matzliach year in the right seminary.

    #987309
    interjection
    Participant

    @jewishteen: Tomer Devorah is straight up Bais Yaakov seminary but with non-Bais Yaakov girls.

    #987310
    higuys
    Member

    I’m really only looking for a Beis Yaakov sem or a sem with good hashkofos. But I guess it wasn’t meant to be. And there was no reason I was rejected because I proved it wrong! And the$18,000 goes to waste but what’s meant to be will be. If I haven’t found a sem by now it’s most likely not gonna happen

    #987311
    imamom
    Member

    Dear Higuys:

    I am so sorry that this happened to you. Someone here mentioned that this is unprecedented. Unfortunately, it is NOT. I am well aware of a situation that happened to a lovely girl in my community, more than 10 years ago. Very similar dynamic. She was “uninvited” right before she was to leave for sem, also due to a phone call from someone in her home community with some negative information about her. The information was not true, the girl was hurt. With lots of advocacy on her behalf by her high school principal, she was ultimately to another seminary in the States. Get someone(s) to generate some options for you and advocate for you, and I”YH all will be well, and you will have an amazing growthful experience. If you would like to “talk” I can be reached through the yeshivaworld mods and I can give you more specific support.

    #987312
    higuys
    Member

    Wow! Would love to speak to you or even to that girl if you are in contact with her! But not quite sure how to get hold of you! Thing is I’m not so willing to go to a seminary here and not in israel…

    #987313
    YITZCHOK2
    Participant

    What do you mean “18,000” went to waste? if they threw you out before the year even started you must get every penny back. you must take them to a din torah now!

    #987314
    Torah613Torah
    Participant

    Being a Rov is a full time job nowadays because stupidities like this.

    Totally off topic, but being a Rov has always been a full time job, as people are human.

    #987315
    higuys
    Member

    Its a whole official contract that had to be signed on acceptance that if for any reason I were to be rejected then wouldn’t get money back… Of course I signed as didn’t think there would be any reason for me to be rejected

    #987316
    YITZCHOK2
    Participant

    If your parents already paid 18000 and can’t get it back it’s not fair to them to try and go to seminary and make them pay that money again. That being said you must go to a din torah ( or better yet an American court if they have any type of American arm) and you will win despite what you signed.

    to torah613torah- When I was a child my Parents ROV had very little to do with me or my siblings getting in to schools , seminary’s shidduchim etc. At most they received a phone call checking me out for a shidduch. Nowadays Rabbanim spend half their day advocating for their misspalleims kids to get into school, seminary camp etc. And when it comes to shidduchim it’s unheard of the amount of time a good Rov who cares about his missplallim has to spend dealing with it.

    #987317
    truthsharer
    Member

    I don’t think the contract would be entirely enforceable.

    There is also no reason not to press on and take the rabbi and the seminary to a din Torah. What better way to be mechanech people on the proper way to deal with things.

    #987318

    @interjection: Tomer Devorah is by no means considered a bais yaakov seminary. There are a mix of girls coming from public high schools to bais yaakov high schools. I know for a fact it’s not even pretending to be a bais yaakov there is no uniform that marks all the bais yaakov seminaries and the classes are more relaxed ( aka no testing besides midterms and finals really) I know people who have gone and no one would say it a bais yaakov still they are a great warm and caring school who are willing to accept girls who couldn’t go other places for various reasons a girl I know switched into TD in march from another bais yaakov seminary and loved it and went back shana bet so @higuys u never know give it a try!

    #987319
    nishtdayngesheft
    Participant

    I think you must have misunderstood the contract.

    In my experience, limited as it maybe, the contracts talk about deposits not being refunded if you pull out. In addition, payments are not completed ahead of time, so I am sure the full amount has not been paid.

    There are a number of other items that seem off about this story, but it is not my business, so I will pursue this further, nor will I state as fact any assumptions as others do.

    #987320
    nishtdayngesheft
    Participant

    Edit to above:

    but it is not my business, so I will NOT pursue this further

    #987321
    higuys
    Member

    Even if it had to be signed by someone called a notary public?

    #987322
    truthsharer
    Member

    A notary public just verifies that the person signing the document is the person signing the document. YWN could require a notary public sign your posts before it gets approved if they wanted to.

    #987323
    🐵 ⌨ Gamanit
    Participant

    higuys- I don’t see how that should make a difference. You paid for a service- they didn’t provide it. If they would be willing to provide the service but you no longer wanted it, they would not be required to return the money. If you’re talking about the application fee, there you’re paying for their service of looking over your application which they did. Since they did review your application, they’re not required to return it.

    #987324
    higuys
    Member

    Is imamom there?! Thanks guys for all your support…means a lot…even from annonymous people online!!!

    #987325
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    higuy:

    You should certainly ask them for any money back that you paid. I imagine they will give that back to you. If they do not, then you should contact a rav and summon them to beis din.

    A notary public won’t make any difference.

    #987326
    truthsharer
    Member

    Right, if you paid a deposit, they MIGHT be able to keep it if you backed out, but if they backed out they need to return the money.

    Then again, seminary administrators are only 2-3 levels up from the Devil.

    #987327
    higuys
    Member

    To the person who said some things seem off about this story- id love to knw what and can I politely say its not just a story….. It’s my life that’s just been completely mucked!!

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