Home › Forums › Shidduchim › Sabotage on Shidduchim
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October 30, 2011 1:51 pm at 1:51 pm #600246Tzvi HirshMember
Do people sabotage themselves on a Shidduch and why!!!!
October 30, 2011 2:00 pm at 2:00 pm #822332Dr. PepperParticipantI may have done it once or twice (OK maybe a few more times).
In cases where I only went out with the girl to get the shadchan to stop harrassing me, my friends, my Rabbeim and my family I would sometimes try to get them to say “no”.
The reason for this is that if I would say “no” the shadchan would say that I didn’t give it a fair chance, that I already made up my mind from before. (She also wouldn’t be able to twist my hand and say “give it one more try”.)
October 30, 2011 2:03 pm at 2:03 pm #822333popa_bar_abbaParticipantYes. The do it because they want to have good stories like Dr. Pepper.
The are retarded, because Dr. Pepper’s stories need to happen for funny reasons, not for retarded reasons- you can’t manufacture them.
October 30, 2011 2:07 pm at 2:07 pm #822334Dr. PepperParticipantpopa_bar_abba-
For the record- I never did anything on a date for the sole purpose of repeating it afterwards.
October 30, 2011 2:18 pm at 2:18 pm #822335AstrixParticipantI have a couple of times. One time i went on a shidduch date at midnight for some interesting reason..there was no shaychus and i was falling asleep..i purposely lit up a cigarette.Other times i just said really stupid things…i still make sure she is comfortable and take her to eat if she wants i will just have fun if its not going to go anywhere.
October 30, 2011 2:50 pm at 2:50 pm #822336EnglishmanMemberAnd you won’t have fun if it is going somewhere, Astrix?
October 30, 2011 2:51 pm at 2:51 pm #822337popa_bar_abbaParticipantpopa_bar_abba-
For the record- I never did anything on a date for the sole purpose of repeating it afterwards.
That is what I was saying. That your stories needed to happen naturally.
October 30, 2011 3:13 pm at 3:13 pm #822338AstrixParticipantEnglishman..
I will have more fun if its going somewhere…i always have fun.
But if its going somehwere i cant take a girl to a bar…..i have to be a bit serious.
October 30, 2011 3:16 pm at 3:16 pm #822339YW Moderator-42ModeratorAstrix, why did you have a cigarette with you?
October 30, 2011 3:26 pm at 3:26 pm #822340popa_bar_abbaParticipantYou should not smoke. You should not even joke about smoking.
Smoking is very disgusting, and is known to be almost as unhealthy as being fat, or being hit by your parents.
October 30, 2011 3:43 pm at 3:43 pm #822341AstrixParticipantBecause i Smoke.i always tell shadchanim that i smoke and to tell the girls and i still get dates bh.Most time i smoke on dates if im comfortable and she is to…i date in a diff. setting than most people here..Israel…when you date in Israel its very diff. chill than in NY.
October 30, 2011 4:05 pm at 4:05 pm #822342EnglishmanMemberAstrix, you take a girl that its going nowhere with to the bar? Or you’re pulling our legs?
October 30, 2011 4:33 pm at 4:33 pm #822343AstrixParticipantIf im in a very interesting mood…bars in Israel are jewish and frum people are there to.I told u its diff. and things like sitting in the park on the grass for a date even for a serious girl is accepted..just walking around..its not like America where u gotta go to the lounge.I have never taken a girl to a bar..a girl asked one time to get a drink after dinner so we went to a bar.i dont think its such a big deal.
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