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- This topic has 12 replies, 8 voices, and was last updated 14 years, 2 months ago by emoticon613.
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September 12, 2010 3:25 pm at 3:25 pm #592328emoticon613Member
i thought it would be nice to open an original poetry section. here’s for starters:
my guiding voice – part one
at first
it clearly
firmly
told me what
to do
where
to go
how
to think.
gradually
it became
softer
gentler
a whisper
in my ear
over
my shoulder
suggesting –
“this is how
we do things”
or
“nisht kain derech.”
some decisions
it made for me
other i made
on my
own.
now that Voice
is silent
except for
the occasional
“how was you day?
and
“what’s doing in life?”
but i forever keep
that Voice
in my mind
my heart
my soul.
part two
now, i am
that Voice
at first
i clearlyy
firmly
told them what
to do
wehre
to go
how
to think.
gradually
lately
my Voice has become
softer
gentlyer
a whisper in
their ears
over
their shoulders
“this is how
we do things”
or
“nisht kain derech.”
some decisions
i make for them
others they make
on their
own
as my daughters
grow up
i will become silent
except for
the occasional
“how was you day?”
and
“what’s doing in life?”
it woud be
sad
but i know
they will forever keep
my Voice
in their minds
their hearts
their souls.
September 12, 2010 3:53 pm at 3:53 pm #695867minyan galMemberEmoticon: Yasher koach. What beautiful words. You are truly talented.
September 12, 2010 11:29 pm at 11:29 pm #695868oomisParticipantWOW!
September 13, 2010 12:10 am at 12:10 am #695869emoticon613Memberthanks. 🙂
does anyone else have anything else to share? i didn’t intend this to be an emoticon613 showing off thread…well, at least, not only. 😉
September 13, 2010 1:29 am at 1:29 am #695870tomim tihyeMemberThank you for sharing this:)
September 13, 2010 3:48 pm at 3:48 pm #695871HashemLovesMeMemberthat’s beautiful! H-Shem has given you talent!
September 14, 2010 2:46 am at 2:46 am #695872eclipseMemberGreat poem!I’d share one of my own but I’ve had my poems copied before,so…
September 14, 2010 3:35 am at 3:35 am #695873BOSDParticipantThis is kinda different from the first poem here but… I wrote it for my shalach manos, but then I posted it on my blog today so I guess I may as well post it here too.
A tragedy is upon our whole nation!
And it threatens to destroy our entire foundation.
Everyone ponders with great consternation
What might become of our population!
The story’s simple, requires no explanation.
It’s a problem that causes immense frustration.
Young and old know of the dire situation:
Eligible maidens still await their salvation,
but with the bochurim we’ve all got to ration.
Month after month, filled with girl’s anticipation;
While burned out boys need a dating vacation.
Now everyone has come to the realization
That we need to join together as a nation
And work to end our sisters’ tribulation.
Well meaning shadchanim, loaded with determination,
Expect us to show tons of cooperation
With our shidduch resume: the ultimate dehumanization.
“What are you looking for?” is the common interrogation
For the “nebach” singles, sitting in isolation.
For the sake of shidduchim, we’ll make any adaptation,
And we strive to be thin, to the point of starvation.
And worse, we’ll put up with lots of aggravation,
Just to go on a list for consideration,
To get a date with a boy of a great reputation.
But still- singles sit in desolation.
What will be with their situation?
When will they take on roles of domestication?
***
Fear not my friends, this dramatization!
One day, we too will say with jubilation
That it’s time to receive our congratulation.
But until the day we send an invitation,
For all our friends to join our celebration,
We’ll settle in for more anticipation,
And wait for Prince Charming to bring our salvation!
September 14, 2010 7:58 am at 7:58 am #695874emoticon613Memberi LIKE! just out of curiosity, what in the world did you put in mishloach manos??
i like how every single line ends in the same letter and sound combination! very creative.
September 15, 2010 5:47 pm at 5:47 pm #695875emoticon613Memberok since this topic is too far down on the totem pole here, i’ll revive it and hope i get a better response than last time. (oomis aren’t you god at poetry? i thought i saw s/t funny by you in the good shabbos section – i could be making that up though.)
anyway, i wrote this after a couple weeks of therapy…
on the outside, i smile.
inwardly, i frown.
outwardly, i laugh – loud and long.
on the inside, i cry – hard.
on the outside, i am confidant.
inwardly, i cringe.
outwardly, i sing.
on the inside, i am silent.
beaming, grimacing, emotional, reticent,
lost, confused, hurt,
brave, believing,strong –
who am i?
part of me smiles,
part of me frowns.
most of me laughs, loud and long,
a bit of me cries, hard.
part of me is confident,
part of me cringes.
most of me sings,
a bit of me is silent.
beaming and grimacing, emotional and reticent.
lost, confused, hurt –
but brave and believing and strong –
who i am.
September 15, 2010 5:55 pm at 5:55 pm #695876blinkyParticipantWow its a real beautiful piece! You are very talented b”h
September 15, 2010 6:28 pm at 6:28 pm #695877emoticon613Memberit’s actually interesting – i was convinced i couldn’t write freeverse, but i guess i can! 😉
September 15, 2010 6:47 pm at 6:47 pm #695878emoticon613Memberhey, ICOT, you’re also really good! i went over to the good shabbos topic to see if i was making it up about oomis (which, incidentally, i wasn’t), and there you were!
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