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- This topic has 18 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 8 years, 5 months ago by ☕ DaasYochid ☕.
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May 20, 2016 6:28 pm at 6:28 pm #617735alter bochurParticipant
So maybe I should give credit to NASI for raising the point that “age is just a number” and shouldn’t be a determining factor for shidduchim. But assuming they are correct what about the vast number of shidduchim redt to older singles with the sole comparitive quality being the similarity in age? Isn’t that amongst the more preposterous ways of matching people up?
May 20, 2016 7:01 pm at 7:01 pm #1153007☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantIs that worse than the vast number of shidduchim redt to younger singles with the sole worthiness of the match being the fact that he’s four years older than she is?
May 20, 2016 7:05 pm at 7:05 pm #1153008alter bochurParticipantNo, it bellies the problem that a somewhat irrelevant factor has become the major determinant.
May 20, 2016 7:10 pm at 7:10 pm #1153009☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantNASI would be very happy if age became totally irrelevant, because then there would be no age gap.
May 20, 2016 7:49 pm at 7:49 pm #1153010alter bochurParticipantOr maybe a huge age gap. Making age irrelevant also means that a well matched 50 year old with a 19 year old is also possible
May 20, 2016 8:01 pm at 8:01 pm #1153011☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantIf age was irrelevant, just as many matches between 19 year old males and 50 year old females would take place as the reverse.
May 20, 2016 8:05 pm at 8:05 pm #1153012alter bochurParticipantIf they were compatible, that is what I was saying. So there would be potentially a huge age gap. Unless of course there are more compatible 4 year age gap people out there…
May 20, 2016 8:12 pm at 8:12 pm #1153013☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantIndividual matches with an age gap aren’t the problem. The problem is the consistent pattern of boys getting married three or four years older than girls. If age was irrelevant, that wouldn’t happen; it would be pretty much even.
May 20, 2016 8:18 pm at 8:18 pm #1153014alter bochurParticipantHow do you know if age was irrelevant that it wouldn’t happen? Perhaps the compatibility is such that people are more compatible with a multi year age gap?
May 20, 2016 8:20 pm at 8:20 pm #1153015☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantThen age is relevant.
May 20, 2016 8:24 pm at 8:24 pm #1153016alter bochurParticipantirrelevant in its own right, but relevant as a factor for determining compatibility
May 20, 2016 8:30 pm at 8:30 pm #1153017☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantSo there opinion that similar in age can be compatible is preposterous?
May 20, 2016 9:51 pm at 9:51 pm #1153018Sam2ParticipantDY: Age in general should never be a positive factor. Too large an age gap can be a negating factor.
May 22, 2016 2:25 am at 2:25 am #1153019☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantSam:
Your two sentences contradict each other. I agree with the second. It’s actually a gemara (which Health doesn’t like).
May 22, 2016 3:42 am at 3:42 am #1153020Sam2ParticipantDY: No they don’t. No one should create or decide a Shidduch based on age. Age can’t be a positive factor. In can be a Psul.
May 22, 2016 6:48 am at 6:48 am #1153021☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantIf a bad age (or age gap) is a negative, a good age (or gap) is a positive.
May 26, 2016 4:46 pm at 4:46 pm #1153022alter bochurParticipantDY: Which gemara are you referring to?
May 26, 2016 4:56 pm at 4:56 pm #1153023JosephParticipantA mod should please change the title of this thread so something like Age Difference Relevancy for Shidduchim, rather than this meaningless overlooked title.
May 26, 2016 5:41 pm at 5:41 pm #1153024☕ DaasYochid ☕Participant:????? ?”?
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