Home › Forums › Decaffeinated Coffee › Painful Shoes/Bruised Heel? (Shidduchim)
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February 10, 2013 12:45 pm at 12:45 pm #608140Torah613TorahParticipant
BH I recently got a beautiful pair of shoes, really beautiful, the nicest pair of shoes I have ever owned. BH I am very active, no foot problems, ever, so even though they weren’t so practical looking, it seemed like little risk.
The joke’s on me. I wore them only a few times, on dates, and walked maybe the length of a block each time. However, I have developed a painful bruise on the back of my heel. It has been 4 weeks since I last wore these shoes, and the bruise is still there.
I assume girls in shidduchim would know about this. I’ve never worn shoes with any type of heel before, is this something you just have to get used to?
February 10, 2013 4:36 pm at 4:36 pm #931628jewishfeminist02MemberNo, you don’t have to get used to it! Don’t wear heels if you don’t feel comfortable in them. I personally only wear heels to weddings (and my high school graduation). The right shidduch will not insist that you wear something that hurts you and leaves lasting damage.
If you really want to try again, however, I recommend a short, chunky heel as opposed to a tall, spindly one. This type of shoe will give your feet the necessary support. Alternatively, you can wear espadrilles or wedges, which I find to be just as comfortable as flats.
I happen to be dating someone who is approximately the same height as me, but if your shidduch is taller, you can experiment with different types of shoes. Payless has some great styles, or if you’re like me and enjoy shopping online, try zappos.com and 6pm.com. You can also join a shoe of the month club, such as JustFab.
February 10, 2013 6:08 pm at 6:08 pm #931629SaysMeMembert613- no, that’s not usual, and doesnt sound good. Especially the 4 week bruise. i’d definitely suggest not wearing them again as is. maybe all you need is an insert/ sticky cushion for the back. but you should not be getting bruises from your shoes. dont take shoe pain lightly. you can really be damaging your feet, possibly permanently
February 10, 2013 7:21 pm at 7:21 pm #931630Torah613TorahParticipantThanks JF and Saysme. I think they are just too tight. Glad to know this is not typical – I googled but nothing was conclusive. They are one inch heels but have a tight back. I might try the inserts, but not anytime soon!
February 11, 2013 12:21 am at 12:21 am #931631OneOfManyParticipantSometimes new shoes are just very stiff and need some breaking in…I’ve don’t usually have this problem with my heels, because I try to stick to only super-comfy ones, but I have it very often with flats. I either stick a band-aid to the back of my heel so it can’t chafe, or walk around with the backs of the shoes smashed in for a bit. ^_^
February 11, 2013 12:47 am at 12:47 am #931632Torah613TorahParticipantOOM: Interesting.
February 11, 2013 12:52 am at 12:52 am #931633SaysMeMemberthat helps for blisters from stiff or tight shoes for sure. But a bruise i’ve never gotten on the back of my ankle, and 4 weeks sounds a bit much. The only shoe bruising i’ve experienced was on top of my big toe from a bump inside my shoe. And that ended up turning into a bunion, so definitely not worth risking.
February 11, 2013 12:56 am at 12:56 am #931634OneOfManyParticipantyep yep
February 11, 2013 1:02 am at 1:02 am #931635yytzParticipantI’ve gotten bruises or blisters on the back of my heel from new shoes. I find that putting a band-aid on them stops the pain and helps them heal (in addition to wearing the new shoes only for short periods of time).
February 11, 2013 1:09 am at 1:09 am #931636Torah613TorahParticipantSaysme: That’s why I asked. It’s a bit weird that after 4 weeks of my most comfortable shoes it’s still hurting, but I always hear people complain about their shoes, and I’ve never had any foot pain before, so I didn’t know if it was normal.
It’s definitely not a bunion and there’s no visible swelling, although if I press it with my fingers, it hurts.
So for the past three days, I davka wore no shoes that touched the back of the heel, but it’s still there. Definitely not normal and now I have to take time off work to go to a podiatrist. 🙁
Thanks Saysme for your help, and OOM for your suggestions.
February 11, 2013 3:55 am at 3:55 am #931637☕ DaasYochid ☕Participantgo to a podiatrist
That’s what I was going to suggest. R”S.
February 11, 2013 6:08 am at 6:08 am #931638YW Moderator-42ModeratorI never understood why girls wear heels. Are you so insecure that you are not happy with the height Hashem made you? I personally couldn’t care less how tall my date is and would rather she be comfortable.
February 11, 2013 6:12 am at 6:12 am #931639SaysMeMember42- would you care if she was taller than you? How about 10” shorter? 🙂
dont worry though, not all girls wear uncomfortable shoes and not all girls wear high heels; not all high heels are uncomfortable, nor are all flats comfortable
February 11, 2013 6:16 am at 6:16 am #931640superstarMemberExcuse me but men have heels on their shoes and they are already taller. Are men insecure too?
February 11, 2013 6:24 am at 6:24 am #931641yehudayonaParticipantThere was an interesting article on high heels on the BBC website a couple of weeks ago. It’s titled “Why Did Men Stop Wearing High Heels?” Apparently they were originally worn by Persian cavalry soldiers. According to someone from a shoe museum, “When the soldier stood up in his stirrups, the heel helped him to secure his stance so that he could shoot his bow and arrow more effectively.” The bottom line is that high heels aren’t for walking.
February 11, 2013 6:40 am at 6:40 am #931642CuriosityParticipantSuperstar: I don’t understand why girls wear shoes with no heels at all. Those dainty fabric shoes that many frum girls wear today offer no arch support.
Mod-42: I don’t understand why girls wear heels either. I completely agree with you.
February 11, 2013 6:52 am at 6:52 am #931643superstarMemberOK but men still have heels on their shoes (not like ladies and not for shooting arrows.) And if they are not for walking then my previous post remains unrefuted.
February 11, 2013 7:04 am at 7:04 am #931644SaysMeMemberi gotta wonder and ask. Mods aside, how come any males are reading this thread passed the OP? 🙂
February 11, 2013 7:42 am at 7:42 am #931645🍫Syag LchochmaParticipantwear golashes – problem solved
February 11, 2013 11:26 am at 11:26 am #931646interjectionParticipantIt’s nothing to do with insecurity. Women wear them because they like how the shoes look and because they like how they look in the shoes.
February 11, 2013 2:56 pm at 2:56 pm #931647miritchkaMemberI always wore heals even though i am on the taller side. I stopped when i met my husband cuz he’s maybe 2 inches taller than me. After a couple of years i bought a pair of 5 inch heels! Hubby likes ’em, I really like them but only get to wear them seldomly when i go to a simcha or if i have the energy to get dressed with shoes on shabbos…I feel so dressed up in them.
Why shouldnt a woman buy something they feel and look good in? (unless of course their hubby’s dont like it…)
February 11, 2013 3:01 pm at 3:01 pm #931648SaysMeMember5 inch heels?!?!?!
February 11, 2013 5:56 pm at 5:56 pm #931649CuriosityParticipantSaysMe, I happen to know the OP irl, and was reading in hope to see her dilemma has been resolved.
Superstar: heels shouldn’t be confused with soles. Men’s shoes have soles with slightly raised heels to provide protection and comfort for walking. Mod42 and I were discussing women’s shoes with high heels.
February 11, 2013 7:20 pm at 7:20 pm #931650Torah613TorahParticipantThanks for your concern everyone. On OOM’s lines, I put a tissue in the back of my boots today, and it’s not hurting as much BH. I’m sure it’s nothing but will go to a podiatrist anyway (anyone know someone who can see people on Fridays or Sundays in Brooklyn?)
As for why I would wear heels, not my type, it’s because this is hishtadlus. It’s not forbidden, and I heard that men like heels, albeit apparently not on this website.
I have not worn heels since then on dates, and don’t plan to in the future, as clearly they do not get along with me.
Wishing everyone comfortable shoes!
February 11, 2013 7:58 pm at 7:58 pm #931651WIYMemberSyag
Do women actually wear womens galoshes?
February 11, 2013 8:30 pm at 8:30 pm #931652OneOfManyParticipantThe reason we wear high heels is what interjection said.
And ^_^ to Syag.
February 12, 2013 2:26 pm at 2:26 pm #931653miritchkaMembersaysme: yup! maybe their 4 inches…gotta double check…havent worn them in a long time…i’m tempted to crash a simcha just so i can wear them…
February 12, 2013 3:00 pm at 3:00 pm #931654SaysMeMemberi once tried on a pair of 4” heels. My sister and i contemplated buying them for purim, before we decided it wasnt worth risking a broken ankle. No but seriously. 5”??? Thats like the size of my hand! Thats like looking at the world from a different perspective. And you said you’re tall already so that makes you over 5’10”. How do you walk in 5 inch heels without killing your feet? Doesnt it make your legs sore? Or is there a good solid 2 inch platform in the front. But still, have u ever misstepped in them? I’d be scared of twisting (or worse) an ankle. Or knee…
February 13, 2013 3:31 am at 3:31 am #931655locaMemberWedges.
And this is weird. Guys, stop hiding and admit u appreciate it when girls wear heels.
And personally, I dont think girls wear heels to actually gain height. It makes us feel more dressy and attractive somehow. No idea why. It just does.
February 13, 2013 5:56 pm at 5:56 pm #931656Torah613TorahParticipantWent to podiatrist. It’s fine and will go away in time, as long as I don’t wear those shoes again.
February 13, 2013 7:20 pm at 7:20 pm #931657OneOfManyParticipantI never wear more than two inches (in which I just barely pass the lower limit of average height :P). I don’t think my feet would survive four inches…
February 13, 2013 9:31 pm at 9:31 pm #931658WIYMemberloca
Ok I admit it. NOW WHAT?
February 21, 2013 2:32 pm at 2:32 pm #931659miritchkaMemberloca: +1
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