Now I Know What It Feels Like…

Home Forums Decaffeinated Coffee Now I Know What It Feels Like…

Viewing 37 posts - 1 through 37 (of 37 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #617327
    Little Froggie
    Participant

    Oops..

    I made the mistake of sending Frogette on a two week vacation.. Little me is in charge of big boss (one year old) and her siblings.. Oy!!! And it’s only day 5…

    H E L P!!!

    (how much sugar do you put into the white load?) (why can’t you have cornflakes for supper)

    #1141500
    Joseph
    Participant

    You *can* have cornflakes for supper.

    #1141501
    takahmamash
    Participant

    Ummm . . . there’s no reason why you can’t serve cornflakes for supper.

    #1141502
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    Add sugar to taste, but make sure the laundry doesn’t overcook. Cornflakes are a breakfast cereal.

    #1141503
    Joseph
    Participant

    Hey, takahmamash is starting to agree with me.

    Winning one convert at a time.

    #1141504
    takahmamash
    Participant

    Joseph, you made me laugh. Shkoyach!

    #1141505
    Joseph
    Participant

    squeak, you heard that? You’re not the only one!

    #1141506
    Little Froggie
    Participant

    HEY!! Don’t laugh at my tzoros….

    and also… there’s a limit to how much cornflakes one can consume..

    Gotta go.. what’s th<<CONNECTION SNAPPED>>

    #1141507
    pcoz
    Member

    When I was in yeshiva I survived on cornflakes for three and a half years for all meals.

    #1141508
    oilyhair
    Participant

    cornflakes for breakfast, flaky corn for supper– nu give them a some baby corn, popcorn, corn on the cob, cornstarch

    theres plenty to make with corn

    or corn flake crumb coated shnitzel or chicken!

    #1141509
    Little Froggie
    Participant

    Oish…

    Where was that one about who wears the dress in the house?!?

    #1141510
    The Queen
    Participant

    From the looks of it, Frogette really needed that vacation. So it wasn’t a mistake to send her. Now that you have an inkling of what she deals with, you’ll hopefully send her every so often to recharge.

    PS. How are you enjoying the laundry?? meals maila, you can get away with cornflakes.

    #1141511
    oomis
    Participant

    You can def have cornflakes for supper, if you use tyhem to coat your chicken cutlets or flounder… (We have been known to have a cereal night or 100, over the last thirty-five years).

    #1141512
    Little Froggie
    Participant

    Queen, you’re VERY perceptive..

    I have now a couple of minutes.. (my boss is napping).

    I actually have it a drop harder.. I have deadlines with clients.. and I use my thinkerator intensely for work, so I can’t allow it and my family responsibilities to conflict. Not an easy feat. But I don’t mind giving to Frogette what she deserves, long overdue. And she’ll have memories that linger long, long afterwards. It’s the first time she’s to the Holy Land for such a long time. In the past she’d indulge in ‘vacation’ only once every birth day (birth of our cuties).

    Our family’s chipping in pretty nicely.. no, it’s not falling apart.. and no, they LOVE my cooking.. and I do try to bring in a cheerful atmosphere. It’s only that it all comes crashing at once, from evening on – – till my eyes close from exhaustion.

    #1141513
    🍫Syag Lchochma
    Participant

    how’s the other new addition doing, the one you had ‘taken in’?

    #1141514
    dovrosenbaum
    Participant

    I’ve had to have cereal quite a few times for supper over the years. Poverty dinners, for the win.

    Corn Flakes with milk, sugar, banana

    Potatoes, eggs, and onions with ketchup and toast

    French toast

    PB and J on matzah (during the year, of course)

    Cream cheese and jelly sandwiches

    Tradition cup a noodles

    Bean soup with fried plantains and rice

    #1141515
    The Queen
    Participant

    LF: You have my sympathies. Just want to point out that at this point in time many of our yiddishe mammas are required to work. And your two weeks of juggling is what their regular life looks like. This is the reason I don’t think it is fair for men to place the responsibility of parnossah on their wives. Raising a family is a full time job and bringing parnossah is another full time job. Hashem created a family with a father and a mother for a reason.

    To all the men who want to weigh in, first send your wife on a two week vacation. Then we’ll talk.

    #1141516
    Avram in MD
    Participant

    The Queen,

    And your two weeks of juggling is what their regular life looks like.

    I think there is truth to this. Taking on your spouse’s role for a while is a good way to appreciate what they do; however, a lot of the “juggling” is likely due to lack of experience and routine.

    This is the reason I don’t think it is fair for men to place the responsibility of parnossah on their wives. Raising a family is a full time job and bringing parnossah is another full time job. Hashem created a family with a father and a mother for a reason.

    And I don’t think it’s fair to make blanket judgements of how other families conduct their affairs. Parents are big boys and girls, and they can make their own decisions and work things out together so everyone is able to thrive. If they cannot, then they have problems that are independent of the lifestyle they are choosing to lead.

    To all the men who want to weigh in, first send your wife on a two week vacation. Then we’ll talk.

    What if she doesn’t want to go?

    #1141517
    Joseph
    Participant
    #1141518
    The Queen
    Participant

    ” a lot of the “juggling” is likely due to lack of experience and routine.”

    Or simply a lack of hours in the day to accomplish everything.

    “Parents are big boys and girls, and they can make their own decisions and work things out together so everyone is able to thrive.”

    Unless of course the shidduch was made on the premise that the wife will work. Many girls pressured by the shidduch crisis, and having no idea what they are getting themselves into, agree at the shidduch to shoulder the ol parnossah.

    I know a woman of a large family who juggles two jobs, and has no option to discontinue, because at her shidduch she agreed to support her husband.

    #1141519
    The Queen
    Participant

    Disclaimer: Women can have jobs of course. Part time I would hope while they are raising their children. (so the children actually get to spend time with mommy) and sometimes it is necessary to cover the bills even with the husband bringing in a paycheck. The question is who is shouldering the burden and who is helping out as necessary.

    #1141520
    takahmamash
    Participant

    PB and J on matzah (during the year, of course)

    I eat this year-round, Pesach included.

    #1141521
    Little Froggie
    Participant

    WOW!!

    Just found a few minutes..

    Thanks all!!

    And Syag, thanks for asking, it’s really something of you to remember! She went back to her parents after some time.. things are working out B”H.

    And Queen, I couldn’t imagine ANY wife working a FULL day’s work to come home to a house and… begin again. No! Actually, as I indicated many times before, my wife does (or did) work, a half day, had little me chauffeur her back and forth.. Can’t imagine one doing it a full day. Unless the husband is a full time home keeper.

    There is one more added point to my workload (of love!), it’s that a man has to be out at least thrice daily… every day. And he needs to learn enough to keep his Neshamah alive…

    #1141522
    The Queen
    Participant

    “a man has to be out at least thrice daily… every day.”

    That is why women are not mechuyav to daven with minyan thrice daily, and why Tattys weren’t meant to be Mommies. (or mommies, tatties.

    #1141523
    The Queen
    Participant

    MD: “What if she doesn’t want to go?”

    A husband offers to stay home with the family so his wife can take a vacation and the wife doesn’t want to go? Unless, the wife has a valid reason why she can’t go, my first assumption would be that she doesn’t trust her husband to take over.

    #1141524
    Avram in MD
    Participant

    The Queen,

    I know a woman of a large family who juggles two jobs, and has no option to discontinue, because at her shidduch she agreed to support her husband.

    This does not contradict what I said in the slightest. If she’s happy to make that sacrifice, then who are we to judge, even if we’d hate to be in her shoes. If she’s unhappy, then they have problems, not because of kollel, but because of her sense of “no option to discontinue.”

    #1141525
    Avram in MD
    Participant

    The Queen,

    Unless, the wife has a valid reason why she can’t go, my first assumption would be that she doesn’t trust her husband to take over.

    It seems perhaps we have a misandrist viewpoint to balance out the mysogynist ones here.

    #1141526
    The Queen
    Participant

    “It seems perhaps we have a misandrist viewpoint to balance out the mysogynist ones here.”

    Sorry you are have it wrong. Just for the record, I am going on vacation iy”H and my husband is staying home with the family.

    #1141528
    Avram in MD
    Participant

    The Queen,

    Sorry you are have it wrong.

    I hope I do, and I apologize for overreacting. What I was responding to was:

    1. Using Little Froggie’s (who works and opened this thread to praise his wife) thread to criticize the kollel lifestyle as objectively wrong.

    2. A perceived implication in your responses that men do not pitch in with housework and childcare, particularly kollel men.

    3. A perceived implication that women are duped into servitude via the shidduch process, and that their husbands don’t care about their suffering later on.

    Am I off base?

    Just for the record, I am going on vacation iy”H and my husband is staying home with the family.

    That’s great! For the record as well, I work and my wife stays home full time, I am very involved in parenting and housework, and I enthusiastically agree with Little Froggie’s sentiments in this thread. And neither my wife nor I want to take a 2-week vacation solo, and it has nothing to do with lack of trust.

    #1141529
    The Queen
    Participant

    MD: Apology excepted. I agree you overreacted. I am surrounded by men folk that I love and yes found it very objectionable to be called a ‘misandrist’.(which I had to google as I never heard of this zach.)

    1. I don’t object to the kollel lifestyle. My husband learned in kollel for the first 5 years of our marriage and I was very proud of him. I have currently 2 sons in law in kollel.

    2. That was only the implication if wife doesn’t want a vacation when offered. Vacations don’t necessarily have to be for 2 weeks. What about a 2-3 day getaway to the beach with a friend. Many men don’t go to the beach because of ????? ?????.

    3. This one is true sometimes. Unfortunately, I know real life examples.

    For the record My husband and I already had our silver wedding anniversary (The night we married off a child) and never spent 2 weeks away from each other.

    #1141530
    Health
    Participant

    Queen -“I have currently 2 sons in law in kollel.”

    Do you want more? I’m available, if you have single daughters.

    #1141532
    The Queen
    Participant

    You’re available?? Just like that? Maybe she’s a one eyed one horned flying lokshen kugel eater.

    #1141533
    Torah613Torah
    Participant

    I like this thread. Good for you taking over, Mr Froggie.

    #1141535
    Health
    Participant

    Queen -“You’re available?? Just like that? Maybe she’s a one eyed one horned flying lokshen kugel eater.”

    Don’t worry! I’m in the medical field, we can cure anything.

    😉

    #1141536
    Little Froggie
    Participant

    Torah613: Thank you, could use ALL the moral support I could get. Oh, btw I found three minutes to breathe, while typing now. Putting it mildly, it’s an experience!!

    Today was a whooper; cleaning, looming deadlines, caring for stuck-on cutie, two ‘customers’ visits, laundry, four projects, supper, mostly concurrently. Should have named this thread “Experiment Gone Awry!!”

    Seeing the satisfied, happy faces of my children make it all worth it.

    #1141537
    Little Froggie
    Participant

    16 and a half hours… I return to my former self

    #1141538
    Little Froggie
    Participant

    For those so interested… I’ve officially removed my tichel!!

    (hey.. there’s fresh air outside! It’s been weeks..)

Viewing 37 posts - 1 through 37 (of 37 total)
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.