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I have lived for the last few years of my life in Manhattan for parnassah reasons. I have to say that the community that I am in has wonderful people, but I need to move out. Prior to this I lived in Monsey (cant move back for family reasons). I’m now married for almost five years and am 29 years old. Due to the changing nature of my business I now B”H have much more flexibility in where I can choose to live. I have a few ideas in my head and I was wondering if the kind people of Yeshiva World can clue me in a bit because although I like to believe that I am well informed, I’m not always.
I’m considering places like Flatbush, Far Rockaway, Passaic and Lakewood, and I’m wondering if people can clue me in. People have told me that I have an out-of-town flavor (maybe because im a nice guy) but I definitely love in town! I have relatives in all of these places other than Lakewood, but I know that the cost of living is less there and that you can get a huge property there for much less than in other places. Also there is a big dugeish on Torah there so that’s a big plus, but I also know that working people there (yes I am a blue shirter AAAAHAHAH!!) might not be the norm (some say its changing) and that the schools can be tough.
Having said that, I am a Ben Torah who is always looking for ways to grow and I am also very much in the business world. I’m a litvish guy with a yeshiva backround (hence “two dots” the Rebbe would always yell at me Yankel, two dots!) and I love nice people who respect other people no matter who they are, what they do, and where they are in yidishkiet. Some communities don’t have a name for that, some do. My wife is similar to myself and I have two boys who I hope wont fall too far from the tree (unless they choose to seclude themselves in the local shteeble, get herring and crackers from an almunah and become the next Rav Moshe Feinstien)
I’m not going to write up my whole life here, so I understand that the best way to do this is to speak to people who know me and my situation, but I still value the blogosphere so I guess one big question I have is this:
Can anyone who currently is in Lakewood and who works for a living please cue me in on it. Would someone like me feel happy there, be part of a community, and not feel like dreck, or is the old stereotype still there? Can I get my kids into good schools?
Any other suggestions are very much welcomed.
Sonce you mentioned Far Rockaway, you should also consider Bayswater, which is a few blocks away from Far Rock proper. I looked there about 10 years ago and from what I hear, its gotten nicer yet. Schools are a bit of a challege (its either carpool to Bklyn or Darchei).
My sister and brother in law live in Lakewood. He is a working guy. They are very happy there at the moment.
However, my sister did say if she had sons she would not be happy with the education there. While they do an excellent job with limudei kodesh, they have extremely limited limudei chol. If that bothers you would have to bus your kids to Deal or Highland Park.
Lakewood is an awesome community and there are many areas of working people. However the schools are all very yeshivish and the limudei chol is not very good. If you do end up living there check out ytt (yeshiva tiferes torah). It is the school in which your type of family would feel most welcome. I also notice that the kids who come out of there 6 years later are the kids with the best middos.
I like FLATBUSH due to it’s lovely convieniences and variety of yeshivos. Flatbush is home to great yeshivos and yeshivos that have great limudei kodesh and limudei chol. My Brother lives in lakewood and he is yeshivish so he fits in there. As you mentioned it is hard to get your children into yeshivos if you arent in kollel. Also, there are Very very few yeshivos in lakewood that have a good limudei kodesh AND limudei chol. Also in highschool most yeshivos don’t even have limudei chol and the ones that do aren’t considered top yeshivos.
On the other hand, in flatbush, there are yeshivos with good limudei kodesh and chol. and in the MARINE PARK area of flatbush there are many many young couples moving there because housing is a bit cheaper there.
And Btw, where in manhattan do you live?
One thing to realize, while all the communities you mention are very nice, fine communities, they all cater to different types of people.
I’m a native flatbusher, its probably as in-town as you can get, and if not, then close to it. In town means peer pressure (in a more adult form), but having a 24 Kosher supermarket not too far, and minyanim for the most part of 24 hours a day.
How about a place like Queens, (very generic, I know) from the little I know about it, it seems to have a nice mix where everyone can find what they’re looking for. As does the 5 Towns area.
Hatzlacha!
Waterbury ct, is a vibrate growing torah & relaxed ( yes there are blue shirters there) community just 90min from nyc.
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