Home › Forums › Humor & Entertainment › Limericks!
Tagged: poetry
- This topic has 809 replies, 102 voices, and was last updated 5 years, 7 months ago by Joseph.
-
AuthorPosts
-
January 18, 2011 1:52 am at 1:52 am #1221371Shticky GuyParticipant
Isnt it wonderful to arrive
At limerick page number 5
I write from my fone
About reaching this milestone
This thread is now truly alive
And as these verses i fix
I tell you i’m getting great kicks
So come on boys and girls
I wanna watch as your pen twirls
Till we hit upon limerick page six!
January 18, 2011 4:13 am at 4:13 am #1221372chayav inish livisumayParticipantthere is a chiyuv called chayavinishlivisumay
it is something that the rabbis say
but do it with bottle of wine
have seven eight or nine
cuz wine is the right way
some do it with beer
and others i fear
do it with hard stuff
cuz they think they are tough
but thats not what the rabbis say
January 18, 2011 6:33 pm at 6:33 pm #1221373blinkyParticipantThis thread is truly divine,
It allows talent to shine,
This limerick will be,
Number three oh three,
Reading them makes me on cloud nine!
shticky- love yours!!
Chayav- yours are cute but not exactly limericks (check rules in begining of the thread)
January 18, 2011 7:24 pm at 7:24 pm #1221374Shticky GuyParticipantBlinky (Blinquie): “shticky- love yours!!”
FOR GOODNESS SAKE; WHICH ONE???????????????????
PS My limerick on the Hasc concert was genuine questions. I really want feedback on the concert. Anyone help me out?
January 18, 2011 8:00 pm at 8:00 pm #1221375blinkyParticipantshticky guy-
You should become a writer for kids maybe like a Jewish version of Dr. suess or something, you really have the talent. If you do, let us know- ill be the first to buy! Anyone else think the same?
January 18, 2011 8:38 pm at 8:38 pm #1221376blinkyParticipantThe Hasc concert i did not attend,
So we will just have to ammend,
Suppose Lipa and Schwekey,
Sang with Dedi,
That sounds like a nice blend!
Shticky- all of them! (i was reffering to the ones with the numbers in them)
January 18, 2011 8:43 pm at 8:43 pm #1221377YW Moderator-80Memberi dont know what a limerick is
but i see it involves a rhyming biz
so ill leave it to you
maybe this is haiku?
January 18, 2011 8:51 pm at 8:51 pm #1221378blinkyParticipantmod. 80 how about this?
stop being modest, you are a rhyming whiz!
January 18, 2011 8:55 pm at 8:55 pm #1221379YW Moderator-80Memberthanks blinky
youre not at all stinky
January 18, 2011 11:07 pm at 11:07 pm #1221383smartcookieMemberMod 80- if you don’t follow rules of the limerick,
We’ll close this thread real quick
You’ve got to follow correctly each line
Then you’ll do just fine
& yours will be the CR’s pick!
January 18, 2011 11:10 pm at 11:10 pm #1221384YW Moderator-80Memberi dont know the rules
rules are for fools
i rhyme what i want
my brilliance to flaunt
if this isnt a limerick
then what is ik?
January 18, 2011 11:45 pm at 11:45 pm #1221385smartcookieMemberMod c’mon you’re much smarter than that,
Don’t you be the world’s brat,
1
1
2
2
1
The lines should be
Just follow my lines & you’ll see
Now try it & I’ll be ready to tip my hat!!
January 19, 2011 12:07 am at 12:07 am #1221386Flatbush DudeMemberOh the tears that flowed from my eyes
of obamas political lies
his dark skin does glow
though admittedy so
from the fibs he fabricates-LIES!
January 19, 2011 12:08 am at 12:08 am #1221387Flatbush DudeMemberOver 300 limericks posted
its amazing how many are roasted
weird posts indeed
where will they lead
they have left me largely toasted
January 19, 2011 12:15 am at 12:15 am #1221388Flatbush DudeMemberMOd 80 and smartcookie did feud
over limericks’ linguistics-so crude
why fight like mere goyim
fight over kibbutzim
just make sure its not misconstrued
January 19, 2011 12:26 am at 12:26 am #1221389Flatbush DudeMemberLimericks are 5 lined patterned rhyme
the first two rhyme and are 8 or 9
syllables are 5 or 6
for the 3rd & 4th mix
then the last line with the first 2 do rhyme
January 19, 2011 12:41 am at 12:41 am #1221390Shticky GuyParticipantMod 80 is a bit of a fopper
When he posts in here limericks that flop-er
We know you are bright
So our pages dont blight
when you are AT LEAST AS GOOD AS POPPA
It may come as a suprise to you
That poppa and mod 80 have the same IQ
So I’ll tell you a secret
And I hope you can keep it
For they are but one person, not two!
January 19, 2011 1:35 am at 1:35 am #1221391YW Moderator-80MemberYou may say that I’m a rhymer
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you’ll join us
And the world will be as one
January 19, 2011 2:30 am at 2:30 am #1221392smartcookieMemberShticky- your last one was amazing! You really have talent!
Fltbush Dude- I’m offended by your post. Nobody was fighting!!!
January 19, 2011 4:41 am at 4:41 am #1221393chayav inish livisumayParticipantblinky i know the rules but i didnt have a rhyme for the last line
Mod 80 ur posts are not so good
but i will tell u what i should
its not right that u have two names
cuz the cr is not meant for playing games
so if u have two everybody cud
January 19, 2011 8:30 pm at 8:30 pm #1221394eclipseMemberMod 80…a song from the 80s,right?
January 23, 2011 3:30 am at 3:30 am #1221395☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantLimericks are hard on the head,
that’s why there’s a poetry thread.
It’s hard to rhyme twice,
impossible thrice!
That’s why I’ll stay there instead.
January 23, 2011 3:33 am at 3:33 am #1221396☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantMy car is still by the mechanic,
and now I am in a real panic.
Oh what should I do,
my kids have the flu,
but I can’t get to Dr. Shanek!
January 23, 2011 3:36 am at 3:36 am #1221397☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantThere once once a chossid from Willy,
who went to go learn in Philly.
but let’s not confuse
the two types of Jews
a chassidishe litvak is silly!
January 23, 2011 3:39 am at 3:39 am #1221398☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantChayav, your issue is weighty.
Are you a man or a lady?
So go see a shrink,
or at least have a drink,
so that you won’t be so far-dreit-y!
January 23, 2011 3:43 am at 3:43 am #1221399☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantIn the CR there’s screamin’ and yellin’;
Who’s who? Nobody’s tellin’.
We know Shticky Guy,
is not Bed-Stuy,
and that Joseph is practically a felon!
January 23, 2011 4:09 am at 4:09 am #1221400chayav inish livisumayParticipantdaas yaochid it seems u are talking alone
do u have conversations with noone else on the phone
u left five comments in a row
so let someone else have a go
nah forget it ill just leave u alone
January 23, 2011 5:13 am at 5:13 am #1221401☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantOn Shabbos, the cholent we eat,
is a very special treat.
But my tummy’s now pained,
oh the calories I gained,
from barley, potatoes and meat.
January 23, 2011 5:19 am at 5:19 am #1221402☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantI now must spend my hard earned gelt,
because I am no longer svelte.
I’ll go in my Chevy,
cause now I’m so heavy,
that I need a new “cholent belt”.
January 23, 2011 5:23 am at 5:23 am #1221403☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantShabbos, the holiest of days,
a good Yid learns, and he prays.
To feed the “neshomo y’seiro”
is not an aveiro,
but the “guf y’seiro”, it stays.
January 23, 2011 5:37 am at 5:37 am #1221404☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantMy asthma causes my wheezing,
my cold has me coughing and sneezing.
I’ve so many ills,
I’ll pop a few pills,
don’t worry, I am just teasing.
January 23, 2011 5:37 am at 5:37 am #1221405watermelonMemberGuf Yiseira!Cute!
January 23, 2011 5:38 am at 5:38 am #1221406smartcookieMemberDaas Yochid- don’t kid yourself please
Its not the Cholent that makes us sneeze
The cholent has beans which is protien
& some meat thats quite lean
It’s the Challah that makes us gain weight in a breeze.
January 23, 2011 5:40 am at 5:40 am #1221407☕ DaasYochid ☕Participantchayav, I just saw your post,
you’re a better poet than most.
I’m talking to no one,
I’m just having some fun;
this thread is a limerick host.
January 23, 2011 5:41 am at 5:41 am #1221408smartcookieMemberShitcky guy if I’m not mistaken
You asked that this thread should not be forsaken
So I wrote this one for you
I hope it will do
& I’ll try some more limericks to make’n.
January 23, 2011 5:49 am at 5:49 am #1221409☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantGuf Yiseira!Cute!
It is my limerick, but that’s not my line (I don’t remember where I heard it).
January 23, 2011 11:59 am at 11:59 am #1221410Shticky GuyParticipantA mega limericker has suddenely appeared
Who writes fantastic limericks 5-tiered
Daas yochid is his name
And he’s gr8 at this game
Why he’s just come along recently is wierd!
Yes not long ago this thread was dying
Go check and you’ll see I’m not lying
There were gaps of a week
So your help I did seek
And right now its just absolutely FLYING!
January 23, 2011 8:38 pm at 8:38 pm #1221411☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantThus far from what I have found,
the best at rhyming a sound,
is someone who’s shticky,
and although I’m picky,
I think he’s the best poet around!
January 24, 2011 1:24 am at 1:24 am #1221412Shticky GuyParticipantDa’as yochid’s efforts I dont want to miss,
But I must draw the line at this,
Its no good for my ga’aiveh,
You’ll give me a ta’aiveh,
For much more than a shmini she’bishminis.
Saying I’m the best POET is the wrong thing said,
When I limericked amongst Poems bitten was my head,
Cos limericks are the best,
Way ahead of the rest,
Thats why I was told post only in THIS thread.
January 24, 2011 5:55 am at 5:55 am #1221413antelope110ParticipantI love that this post received so many responses.
Bye Bye Burglar
by Antelope110
A burglar through my door once burst
Ready to burgle his worst
But I must confess
That he found such a mess
He thought someone had gotten in first.
January 24, 2011 5:56 am at 5:56 am #1221414antelope110Participantshticky: to reduce the size of your head, shtick to the correct beat for limericks!
January 24, 2011 5:58 am at 5:58 am #1221415antelope110ParticipantDaas Yochid, you’ve turned an Irish art into a Jewish vehicle for truth through fun.
January 24, 2011 7:45 am at 7:45 am #1221416☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantI’m sorry if I told the truth,
it’s something I’ve done since my youth.
But please don’t be haughty,
’cause that’s very naughty,
and some would say that it’s uncouth.
If ga’ava’s not your favorite flavor,
I was just returning the favor;
You spoke well of me,
undeservedly,
and kovod I also do savor.
January 24, 2011 8:23 pm at 8:23 pm #1221417blinkyParticipantIm happy the brain in my head
Gave me the idea to start this thread
When i start to brood
And get in a bad mood
I quicky run here instead!
January 24, 2011 8:35 pm at 8:35 pm #1221418☕ DaasYochid ☕Participantantelope110,
Thanks for the compliment, but the credit is due Blinky. In other words:
Thank you for your words so nice,
and for adding to this thread some spice.
But Blinky is earning
the credit for turning
a limerick into a Jewish device.
January 25, 2011 4:35 am at 4:35 am #1221419smartcookieMemberDidn’t write a rhyme in a while
It really became my new writing style
I think it’s a ball
Come one come all
And help the Limerick thread pile!
It’s always the same few ladies and gentlemen
Who write limericks again and again
We want all of you to join in
Come on and BEGIN
What are you waiting for? Pick up your pen!
January 26, 2011 7:35 am at 7:35 am #1221420yossi z.MemberI started to read this thread
And then began my head
Reading and flying
Thinking and rhyming
All while laying in bed!
It is now two in the morn
My head is all in a swarm
For limericks I try
From nine to five
And if I can help it, some more
It seems that I have got stuck
Here all in a muck
Reading and writing
Timing and rhyming
Oh no! It is time to get up!
How was that?
January 26, 2011 3:06 pm at 3:06 pm #1221421☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantYossi, it was a nice try,
but your poems just did not fly.
Not bad the timing,
but awful the rhyming,
So I will let you know the rules,
(I went to four limerick schools).
These rules you must follow,
so here are some important tools.
it must fit into certain specs,
Lines 1,2, with 5
and 3 with 4 jive,
and there is not much room to flex.
The first and the second line,
may not have more sounds than 9.
Lines 3 and 4
cannot have more
than five, for the limerick to shine.
With one more rule I will proceed,
the final line may not exceed,
syllables seven,
for limerick heaven,
and now you know how to succeed!
Your effort, I really commend;
my words, I hope, do not offend.
January 26, 2011 3:47 pm at 3:47 pm #1221422yossi z.MemberOhhhh now it makes sense (I was having trouble figuring out how it was supposed to work). Thanks a lot daas
😀 yo$$i 😀
January 26, 2011 4:47 pm at 4:47 pm #1221423yossi z.MemberMazal tov to my cousin
She now has a chosson
The wedding’s today
So on my way
To B-more I shall be goin’
(I know, still not the greatest but I stayed within the guidelines-one thing at a time) but still true-I am heading to baltimore today for my cousin’s chasuna
-
AuthorPosts
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.