It hurts my feeling when

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  • #604133
    MorahRach
    Member

    Whenever I read a thread that someone clearly put a lot of thought and emotion into, and people make amid remarks about that persons spelling… It drives me up the wall!!! Not only are my feelings hurt when someone seemingly disregards my entire post and just says things like ” morahrach why don’t you check your gramma first”, but when I see other peoples’ grammar being attacked it upsets me even more. Do you think Hashem is proud of you for calling outside another Jew and embarrassing them or do you think he is keeping track of all the times you do ( many of which I am sure you have forgotten). I think we all need to be a little kinder and realize that just because we do not actually know each other does not mean that every person he does not deserve respect.

    What hurts your feelings in the CR!?

    #886389
    optimusprime
    Member

    The continuous bashing and insulting of Gedolim which other posters disagree with.

    #886390
    choppy
    Participant

    Haifagirl: Please point out the necessary corrections.

    #886391
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    When I read this thread all I wanted to do was to find a spelling mistake.

    #886392
    MorahRach
    Member

    Ok well done making it into a joke. It is not the biggest deal, I am just telling you it hurts my feelings and I am sure I’m not the only one. I went to college along with a lot of other people on this site, we just write on the fly sometimes and do not have the time to edit our posts as if they are essays for school. It’s nice to be respectful.

    #886393
    2scents
    Participant

    I don’t think that people attack other’s grammar, I have been called out a few times (rightfully so..)

    I know that my grammar is not perfect, however I do not think that the spellcheckers out there are attackers, they just point out your (or my) mistakes.

    Whey is it that you get so hurt about this?

    #886394

    choppy and pba, that was really uncalled for. you are not funny. i agree with you, morahrach, 100%.

    #886395
    HolyMoe
    Participant

    MorahRach

    This completely baffles me.

    How can you have hurt feelings when you are totally anonymous.

    No one knows who you are.

    The critique can’t possibly be personal !

    #886396
    MorahRach
    Member

    I’m not sure why I get so hurt by it. I know it is not a personal attack but it makes me feel bad nonetheless. When someone takes the time to either ask for advice/help, give advice or an opinion on something clearly important to them and to be met with critisism isn’t right. You may think you are being funny but I can assure you (whoever does this) you are not.

    #886397
    oomis
    Participant

    Morahrach – please don’t feel so hurt. Some people cannot help but be critical, and even if and when they are correct about the mistake, it is not worth the emotion you are putting into feeling bad about it – especially a nice person such as yourself.

    Accept (as I do) that when we are typing we sometimes make errors and don’t always catch the need to edit in time. We are human. So big deal if we misspelled something or wrote something that was not gramatically up to par. Does that diminish us in any way? No! Laugh about it, and try not to make the kind of typo that I once did, and about which I still get razzed (because it came out almost as an obscenity before I realized I had left out a truly crucial letter in a word).

    I don’t believe that anyone is really mean-spirited enough to want to hurt your or anyone else’s feelings in the CR. At least, I would hope not. And I am not proofreading this post before sending, so I hope I didn’t make any mistakes, but if I did, SO WHAT???????

    #886398
    Kozov
    Member

    2scents, the question is, why does anyone pay attention to things like spelling when the point in the post is the content? Its not relevant. I think spellcheckers should be called out for being trolls. Unless every other word is spelled wrong.

    #886399
    OneOfMany
    Participant

    I agree with you, MorahRach. And the funny thing is that a lot of what people nitpick over (like “who” vs. “that”) is actually not grammatically incorrect, as anyone who has read a decent manual of style would know. I always feel like pointing this out but then realize that that would make me just as annoying and trifling as the person I’m pointing it out to. 😛

    #886400
    chavrusa
    Member

    #886401
    Shticky Guy
    Participant

    az lonng az peepil kann reed yoor postt, itt shudent matterr howw yoo spel .

    Miss Spell was my English teacher in school! (jk)

    #886402
    Shticky Guy
    Participant

    btw for the poster you are referring to, maybe the mods can change her subtitle to

    #886403

    chavrusa is so right. thank you! and for all of you who decided to go ahead and make fun of this thread, it shows a lot about who you are, and it really doesn’t show good things. i’m glad i don’t know some of you personally. you don’t sound like serious people who care about others’ feelings.

    #886404
    MorahRach
    Member

    Thank you guys for weighing in! Nice to know I am not the only one who feels this way. I remember I was having a really bad day a few months ago and I had commented on a post here offering some kind of heartfelt advice, and two different people corrected a missing letter from a word, and I literally had a miserable night! It’s silly maybe to be offended by someone you don’t know but people are sensitive. Anyway..glad this thread received some interesting attention. Hope everyone is enjoying their summers!

    #886406
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    I have to come to PBA and choppy’s defense here. I do not think in any way that they invalidated MorahRach’s feelings.

    I actually understood their comments to be doing the reverse.

    I have one question, though. Wouldn’t this thread hurt the feelings of those who correct others’ grammar?

    #886407

    no it shouldn’t daasyochid, because if someone is trying to be serious, we don’t point out trivial mistakes. there’s no point. its common sense. which apparently many ppl don’t have here.

    #886408
    MorahRach
    Member

    DY , I would hope not. I specifically did not put any posters names who I feel do this on a routine basis. Someone else did but honestly that was not even who I was referring to. I don’t see looking from every angle how their comments were productive and/or helpful to the thread, they were just validating my original point.

    #886409

    anyway, to anyone who seems to have a hard time understanding this thread, the Torah says that if someone is sensitive, we have to be very careful not to hurt them. it doesn’t say that the sensitive person has to learn to deal with the shortcomings and insensitivity of others.

    #886410
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    MorahRach,

    I happen to agree that pointing out a silly grammatical mistake is disruptive to a thread, (and I think, although I could be mistaken, that the comments regarding the grammar of your OP were meant to highlight this) and could be hurtful if the thread is about a sensitive issue, or if the object of the correction is sensitive.

    It’s interesting that you were not referring to the specific poster whose grammatical correction you objected to in a recent thread.

    Mazel tov on the baby, have much nachas, and enjoy the trest of your summer as well.

    #886411
    MorahRach
    Member

    That is because after I commented on that posters remark I decided I start a thread about it! Thank you!

    #886412
    wanderingchana
    Participant

    MorahRach – I’m sorry if I have ever hurt your feelings in this way. Sometimes I do correct spelling/grammar, and I have complained at times when people post as if they’re texting (with no paragraph breaks, etc). Mistakes detract from the message, sometimes to the point that I won’t bother trying to parse a post if it’s too difficult.

    P.S. I <3 the edit feature. LOL…

    #886413
    kapusta
    Participant

    the Torah says that if someone is sensitive, we have to be very careful not to hurt them. it doesn’t say that the sensitive person has to learn to deal with the shortcomings and insensitivity of others.

    +1

    *kapusta*

    #886414

    Where is haifagirl?

    This is funny. Sometimes it annoys me as well, but not to this extent.

    #886415
    miritchka
    Member

    It hurts my feelings when a topic is started with a request for ideas/help… and others start to make fun of the topic or make a joke out of it. If its not me who started the topic, i feel like defending the OP even if the topic is silly or if the OP is wrong.

    #886416
    Rsoz
    Member

    My feeling is that if someone advertises that they are a teacher or a Morah, they have a bigger responsibility to be accurate in spelling and grammar than the average person who is not out there educating our children. I personally was horrified to get homework sheets from my child returned with misspellings from his teacher! And you can be sure I called her on it.

    #886417
    MorahRach
    Member

    If I am responding to a thread on my phone ( the keys are much smaller than on my laptop resulting in more typos) nursing my child, trying to eat for the first time all day, i would think the wonderful people of the CR would forgive an occasional missing letter or ” their” instead of “there”. In school or anywhere else that would drive me nuts as well but this really Isn’t a forum to embarrass someone and point out THEIR mistakes. I understand what you are saying about those who are teachers but I can’t agree. This is not a formal setting where posts are re-read again and again. Also i want to point out that on my iPhone, many times I will begin to type a word and auto correct will decide which word they want me to use and replace what I typed.

    #886418
    Kozov
    Member

    Rsoz, I don’t think the spellcheckers discriminate, as long as the person is misspelling, so besides for teachers I take it you agree with the OP.

    #886419
    SayIDidIt™
    Participant

    miritchka, I know I am guilty of doingthat some times, but I agree with you. If someone starts a normal thread, others should not turn it into a joke.

    About spelling: unless someone uses “txt talk”, to correct silly mistakes is wrong. Not everyone is great at spelling and grammar and the CR is not a classroom. However, people should use a spell-checker.

    Let’s try to be more considerate to people. Online and off!

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