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Being an unemployed 43 yo man with Asperger’s Syndrome and depression, I would not even think about looking for a date.
But I still would like to be a part of community — there are many Jewish men in my situation. Maybe they can help me both in observance and in material objectives such as getting documents for disability. I would also be very interested in finding a rabbi. The closest Chabad is 50 miles away and I do not drive.
What about MOVING closer to Jews?
You may have heard of the adage: Meshane Makom, Meshane Mazal.Change the place, change (improve) the fortune.
My last move was like breathing in new life. It works!!
Search for your location on godaven.com. There may be a synagogue that is not Chabad closer to you.
Also, mods, I don’t believe this is a “controversial topic”…
If you take a distance learning (over the internet/correspondence) course you could Im yertza H-sh-m gain some skills to get a decent job or start a small business (possibly selling some goods or services over the net so you could work as many or as few hours from home as you wish) and earn enough money to move into a more Jewish community.
May G-d grant you bracha V’hatzlacha, B’corave, Mamesh.
Even if you cannot drive to your local Chabad, you can still develop a relationship with the shul and the rabbi. Give him a phone call and tell him about yourself. I’m sure he will agree to become your rabbi and to learn with you over the phone. He may even be willing to drive to you to (for instance) kasher your kitchen and provide you with tefillin.
aspergers is one aspect of you, but it doesnt need to define you. You should get help to overcome your depression, and give yourself hope, a vision, goals, a chance. Don’t write yourself off! Don’t limit yourself! You can learn skills, try to find a job, find a (perhaps shared) place to live. If there is somewhere you’d like to see yourself, perhaps find some contacts and a rabbi there and ask them what they know/can do to help you make the move a reality. If you are seeing a therapist for depression, ask him/her for advice on types of jobs you can get. Perhaps not an office job, maybe in a school, maybe woodworking, maybe cashier. There are all types of jobs with the full spectrum of qualifications needed, you just need to find your area.
If you have internet access try to research (google) classes on Judaism over the internet.
Math shouldn’t impact your everyday living. With any disability it opens you to find what you are in fact capable of accomplishing. In your research I would suggest finding great accomplished individuals who had depression and Asperger’s syndrome. I’m sure you are gifted in areas you never knew you were.
Please keep us posted on how you are doing. And do not hesitate to reach out to the Chabad rabbi– it’s his job to help you!
There is a chabad online and don’t look in the past just keep moving on with life and don’t worry i’m sure if you REALLY want a husband you’ll find one H’H just talk to shadchanim and i’m sure they’ll be more then happy to help:)
I can relate with your story. I’m a 31 y/o jewish guy with Asperger’s. There are others out there too. I gave up on dating a few years ago too and i’ve been thinking about getting reacquainted with my roots. It’s not easy to do considering I am one of maybe 5 jewish people living in Newark. I’m here for the work: live-in superintendent, real estate agent, and maintenance tech. it keeps me busy enough not to reflect too much on my life, because when I do it feels like i’m missing something. Best of luck to you. You have a friend here
You should collect disability as soon as possible. If moving to a more Jewish community isn’t possible, inquire about staying in a Jewish community for shabbat and yom tov. I’m sure rabbanim would be more than happy to put you up. Coming from a family where there isn’t much observance, I relate to your plight in certain ways, and in my journey of becoming Orthodox, I’ve had great support.
I love Lost’s subtitle!!!!!!!
Kudos to the mod that came up with it,
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