How to Dress?

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  • #595440
    cshapiro
    Member

    what to wear?? to play it safe on a date when u dont know where ur going or how chilled out he is? example: ill prob wear limo scene by essie as opposed to berry hard…BUT my question is, do i wear a black dress or try to pull off the ‘bais yaakov’ look and wear a pleated skirt and sweater with coach flats???

    #746580
    Ofcourse
    Member

    Cute.

    ‘bais yaakov’ look = Coach flats?

    Which ‘bais yaakov’? Located where?

    #746581
    mom12
    Participant

    Wear what u r!

    I would go for something neat and not very fancy and not too casual or sporty..but neverthelss something that portrays YOU!

    and if he doesnt like what you are wearing, because of what it potrays, and the personality is not what he is interested in I guess it’s not a shiduch! GOOD LUCK

    #746582
    charliehall
    Participant

    Don’t try to look like something you aren’t.

    #746583
    pumper
    Member

    a black dress sounds pretty safe to me, unless it is super funky or something.

    #746584
    cshapiro
    Member

    of course not charlie, but i do own pleated skirts and button down sweaters but i also have a short red dress which may give off the wrong impression…

    pumper…junees prob pretty safe?? or should i go moda, which is prob pushing it….

    #746585
    mom12
    Participant

    Don’t try pushing anything..Let Hashgacha take its course..

    If its right let it flow if its wrong let it just go away!

    #746586
    aries2756
    Participant

    You can always go with a dress that you can dress up or down depending on what he is wearing or wear he takes you. Before you put on your coat you can add a scarf or sweater/jacket to tone up or down depending.

    #746587
    bombmaniac
    Participant

    “‘bais yaakov’ look = Coach flats?

    Which ‘bais yaakov’? Located where?”

    and here is where kinnah starts…

    #746588
    Ofcourse
    Member

    bomb, “‘bais yaakov’ look = Coach flats?

    Which ‘bais yaakov’? Located where?”

    and here is where kinnah starts…

    What kinnah? You can get Coach imitations all over New York for cheap. Either way, it’s not a BY look. Its a wanna-be look. In my eyes, a BY look is relatively plain flat or heeled pumps. No logos. (I used to be very wanna-be. These days, once in a while, I wear old stuff with logos that I dont have the heart to throw out).

    #746589
    mytake
    Member

    cshapiro

    Wear anything that’s ‘you’! Why would you dress like someone you’re not?

    #746590
    oomis
    Participant

    Dress neatly and attractively, period. Goes for the guys also. You’re not going to a simcha, but you’re not going to a truck rally, either. Dress casual Shabbosdig.

    #746591
    dunno
    Member

    Depends what number date it is. For the first date I would pick the dress.

    #746592
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    I have this shitta that girls usually don’t dress up enough for first dates.

    #746593
    1dayatatime
    Participant

    ” For the first date I would pick the dress. “

    And for the second, you would let him?

    #746594
    apushatayid
    Participant

    Dress like you always do. This is 20 years ago, but I (male) was always told to dress as if I was going to shul on shabbos.

    Just an aside, unless the guys has 1)sisters into these things and 2)telling what and how to look out for it, I doubt the average yeshiva guy knows Coach flats from a Coach bus.

    #746595
    aries2756
    Participant

    What kinnah? If you can afford coach buy it? If you can’t buy it on sale!

    #746596
    bpt
    Participant

    “try to pull off the ‘bais yaakov’ look”

    Go for it, becuase no doubt, he is going for the “BMG” look, so the 2 of you are destined for each other.

    #746597
    bpt
    Participant

    “I doubt the average yeshiva guy knows Coach flats from a Coach bus.”

    Can’t speak for all boys, but the crowd I see knows their stuff. When I was in HS, I was told this: your shirt needs to cost more than your pants.

    With decent pants costing $30-$50, a Brooks Brother shirt is the bare minimum

    #746598
    Ofcourse
    Member

    apushatayid, I doubt the average yeshiva guy knows Coach flats from a Coach bus.

    Not if they have huge “C”s all over them! Then they’re V E R Y noticeable shoes, not a bus.

    #746600
    apushatayid
    Participant

    Noticable Cs? I went to the coach website, and had I seen the pattern on a shoe and was not on the coach site, I wouldnt have those were “c’s” let alone coach shoes. If you think people know that you are wearing coach shoes, and it makes you feel good to wear such shoes (especially if people understand the “chashivus” of such shoes) and they look good and are comfortable, wear them. If you wear them because you think the average yeshiva guy knows you are wearing coach shoes, you may as well buy a pair of flats in payless.

    #746601
    cshapiro
    Member

    of course…umm eww i would never wear fake, thats so tacky.

    bpt…u make me laugh!!!

    and btw ive dated guys who wore nicer shoes than mine!!!

    popa bear…i dress up, i just dont want to be over dressed, u know..

    mytake…all my clothes are me…but its all about first impressions rite??!

    #746602
    bpt
    Participant

    u make me laugh!!!

    Uch un vei.

    #746603
    cshapiro
    Member

    and oomis what if he decides to take u to the board walk…is it okay to take off my shoes so my heels dont get stuck and i dont fall?!?!

    #746604
    observanteen
    Member

    I never whent out on a date (yet…)but I think I’d wear the dress. It’s classy and fine (seems to be). Gives a nice impression I think. Oh, and GOOD LUCK!!!!

    #746605
    cshapiro
    Member

    thanks observ..but i dont believe in luck, i believe in hashem :))

    everything i own is classy thats why i have this dillema, its should i be edgy classy or aidel classy?

    #746606
    observanteen
    Member

    Ooops. Sorry Shapiro. May Hashem help you find your right zivug in the right time!:) I’d wear the eidel classy. I think it gives the right impression. Shows humbleness I suppose. Do I make sense at all?

    #746607
    bpt
    Participant

    “edgy classy or aidel classy”

    Please tell me the boy is from BMG. No better yet, please tell me he’s going to wear a shtramel, but with a “square back” haircut.

    Either way, he is def the one for you!

    #746608
    cshapiro
    Member

    lol bpt i hope hes a na nach!!!

    #746609
    aries2756
    Participant

    Hmmmmm, coach and a white kapalah! Yeah! go for it!

    #746610
    stickynote
    Member

    everybody this post is getting me ______ (Most) boys dont notice what you are wearing and really couldnt give a hoot. As long as youre presentable and the outfit fits right what else do they know( or care)??

    After the first date the boy comes back from his date his mother asks him, “so what was she wearing”. He says I think a black dress and he is probably right..:)

    Dates are not like a fashion show like girls have in high school or something.These are BOYS..They think they know whats classy and in, but sometimes they are way off.So dont think they are judging you by your clothing or style hopefully they arent. if they are then they should just get a life!

    #746611
    cshapiro
    Member

    yo sticky, what are ur credentials!??!

    #746612
    stickynote
    Member

    If i say I will give myself away…Trust me I have first hand experiences on this matter!

    #746613
    cshapiro
    Member

    ‘If i say I will give myself away’

    thats highly unlikely but ummm okay!??!?!?

    #746614
    red head
    Member

    I only wear black on first dates….my dad thinks i’m nuts. he would prob want me to go out with my hair in a pony and minimal makeup. he hates when i get all dressed up. and i quite agree. no guy likes when youre all caked upped. you should look as natural but as beautiful as possible. i did have some weird situations when a waiter/waitress complimented me on how i looked in front of the guy lol!!!!

    #746615
    cshapiro
    Member

    lol red head thats embarrassing….if u r really a red head u prob look fabulous is green and brown too!!

    #746616
    red head
    Member

    yup i am truly red! those are gr8 colors…..

    oh my! it was soooo mortifying! bartender was like: you have a beautiful girlfriend!!

    I was ready to sink into the floor. and he didnt even crack a smile or wink! that’s what i wudve done if i was he. wtvr – i actualy just saw him engaged on only simchas the other day. it’s so nice to see the guys that you went out with move on.

    #746617
    aries2756
    Participant

    There is no such thing as “most” guys. No one knows what the guy you happen to date likes unless the shadchan or he tells you. If you try to second guess you are always wrong. If you don’t wear enough make up they have a tanah about that; if you wear too much they have a tanah about that, if you curl your hair they like straight, if you straighten your hair they like hair with body, etc. You have to be yourself and do what you are comfortable with, take it or leave it.

    #746618
    cshapiro
    Member

    redhead…thats awkward but funny, i cant recall that happening on a date, but i have had clients say things and its so embarrassing especially if its in front of my boss.

    aries, true and thats why i asked the question to begin with, but i guess ur saying theres no rite answer..!??!

    #746619
    apushatayid
    Participant

    This goes back almost 20 years…..

    In Rockville Center LI there was a cafe called Timepiece Cafe. A friend of mine ALWAYS went there on a first date. In the space of a week he went with three different girls and the 3rd time, the guy at the coat check exclaimed “you have to teach me your tricks bro, three different good looking girls in one week”.

    “You have to be yourself”

    Ditto. You can not and should not worry about what they want you to be like. You simply must be yourself.

    #746620
    cshapiro
    Member

    im not worried…i just wanted to hear other peoples suggestions…

    im going to a wedding sunday evening and i dont want to wear black, but the bridal party is wearing fusia…would it totally clash if i wore red??

    #746621
    apushatayid
    Participant

    I always tell my wife, wear what you have in the closet that is appropriate for the occasion. If you have nothing appropriate in the closet, go buy it. Don’t worry about everyone else and what they are wearing.

    #746622
    aries2756
    Participant

    You certainly will stand out like RED thumb!

    #746623
    bpt
    Participant

    ” Don’t worry about everyone else and what they are wearing. “

    I roll my eyes every time we go out to a venue whose dress code is not clear cut. She will call 2-3 of the other attendees to ask “what are you wearing?”

    As if there is a world of difference between the 20 black items they have in the closet.

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