How come

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  • #597737
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    when women watch the kids it’s being a mother, and when men do it’s babysitting?

    #783226
    sof davar
    Member

    For the same reason that when a women gets a job it is a “second income”.

    #783227
    deiyezooger
    Member

    Because when men do it its about “surviving” the afternoon without mommy.

    #783228

    deiyezooger hit that nail right on the head.

    #783229
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    No. It’s because babies like their mother more, and cry for the mother even when they’re with the father. Hence, it is babysitting.

    #783230
    Pac-Man
    Member

    Because it is a mother’s natural job, and not a father’s.

    #783231

    It’s because babies like their mother more

    I don’t think the entire collective of babies have only one shared mother.

    And you can’t answer your own questions. It makes it seem like you were asking rhetorically.

    #783232
    sof davar
    Member

    “Because it is a mother’s natural job, and not a father’s.”

    That was the point that I was trying to make with my comparison to the “second income”.

    #783233
    mewho
    Participant

    if fathers spend as much time with the baby as mothers do then they are not sexond class caretakers or babysitters. the baby would be just a close to the father as to the mother.

    think about the stay at home dads

    #783234
    Pac-Man
    Member

    Exactly. Earning an income is the husband’s natural job, and not the mother’s.

    #783235
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    mewho: That isn’t necessarily true.

    If fathers stayed home, they still wouldn’t be able to nurse. Psychological differences between men and women are as real as the physical ones.

    #783236

    Fathers can give the baby a bottle, same as non-nursing mothers (or even nursing mothers who want their baby to be able to take a bottle) do.

    #783237
    sof davar
    Member

    Mothers have an innate ability to care for a baby’s physical and emotional needs in a way far superior to the that of the father.

    It is my belief that a good deal of feminism has seeped into frum culture to the point where many of us begin to question the distinct roles and nature of men and women/mothers and fathers that are really quite obvious.

    #783238
    deiyezooger
    Member

    I think of myself as a good father, my kids love when I play with them, tell them stories, help them with their homework, take them to the grocery, but when they are down (hurt, not feeling well etc their first choice will be mommy.

    #783239
    adorable
    Participant

    I agree with those posters above who said that its because its the mother natural job and she is therefor better at it- she can sense somethings that the father would not pick up. I personally know that my mother would pick up way faster than my father when I’m going through something.

    #783240
    deiyezooger
    Member

    ” she can sense somethings that the father would not pick up.”

    Like a dirty diper!! We fathers are capable of playing with a todler and enjoy his compeny while the odor is so bad that the carbon monoxite detecter should realy go off…

    #783241
    deiyezooger
    Member

    And btw that dosn’t make us bad fathers, we are good fathers but we are not mothers.

    (That does not mean mothers are superior, it means mothers were created to do some things, while the fathers have another role.)

    #783242
    umm
    Member

    Because they lose their patience faster, they can do a babysitting ‘stint’ but cant do it for an ongoing period of time. (it’s not worth it for us either!)

    #783243

    I think the most important question we need to ask ourselves that came out of this thread is:

    Was Poppa’s usage of “How come” grammatically correct in this situation? Should he have used “Why”? These are questions every mother and father must ask (in no particular order) him and herself at least once in a lifetime- preferable her or his own.

    #783244
    adorable
    Participant

    popa- what made you think of this thread?

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