Homophones

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  • #593640
    deiyezooger
    Member

    Lets see how many homophonens we can list here.

    male – mail

    main – mane – Meine

    flower – flour

    won – one

    to – too – two

    three – tree

    four – for

    eight – ate

    plane – plain

    meet – meat

    bored – board

    where – were

    here – hair – hear – hare – heir – her

    dairy – dirty

    no – know

    not – knot

    new – knew

    by – buy

    I – eye

    ear – air

    fare – fair

    #720765
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    How many homophones does it take to change a lightbulb?

    #720766

    their-there-they’re

    weight-weight

    sore-soar

    dear-deer

    chair-cheer

    hour-our

    ball-bawl

    new-gnu

    suit-soot (stretching a little-depends how you say the second word)

    threw-through

    #720767
    ronrsr
    Member

    From: The Miracle of Language by Richard Lederer

    One night a knight on a hoarse horse

    Road out upon a road.

    This male wore mail for war and would

    Explore a road that glowed.

    His tale I’ll tell from head to tail.

    I’ll write his rite up right.

    hidden site our hero found,

    a sight that I shall cite.

    With woe he shouted , “Whoa!” as rain

    Without a break did reign.

    To brake, he pulled the rein, and like

    A shattered pane felt pain.

    The poor knight met a witch, which made

    Sweat pour from every pore.

    He’d never seen a scene like that.

    His sore heart couldn’t soar.

    Then they a game for truffles played,

    In which he mined her mind.

    To prove who was the better bettor

    And find who should be fined.

    He won one twice, he won two, too.

    To grate on her felt great.

    To wrest the rest, he went for four,

    And, at the fore, ate eight.

    Due to her loss, the mourning witch,

    Her truffles missed. I know no way,

    Do I, to weigh her rue.

    As a swarm of scared fleas flees.

    He heard a herd of dear deer pray

    The pleas of prey: “Please, please.”

    A grisly grizzly bear, all bare,

    and a hare that had no hair

    And a foul fowl bawled that they were bald.

    In their pink skins they stood there.

    The knight did see a blue whale wail

    As it blew out plumes of sea.

    “Yoo hoo, you who come riding here,

    Please hear and pity me.”

    Our knight began to reel, for real,

    The world whirled, so to speak.

    All the days of the week his sole soul felt

    The dizzy daze of the weak.

    Our heir to knighthood gave it up.

    He felt the fare not fair.

    His wholly holy sword soared up

    As he threw it through the air.

    To end our tale draws nigh.

    Without ado, I bid adieu,

    So by your leave, bye-bye.

    #720768
    ronrsr
    Member

    have you heard the one about the man who bequeathed his offspring a cattle ranch and named it Focus?– because it’s the place where the sons raise meat.

    #720769
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    And here are some heterophones:

    computer- telphone

    car- quickly

    vicarious- generic

    table- incomplete

    composting- incandescent

    #720770
    AinOhdMilvado
    Participant

    I didn’t even know they had special phones!

    #720771

    “I crack a window and feel the cool air cleanse my every pore, as I pour my poor heart out” – Open Road Song by Eve 6

    #720772

    Liberace

    Oscar Wilde

    Rock Hudson

    Rudolph Nureyev….oops wrong list

    #720773
    deiyezooger
    Member

    Popa can we have the answer about the light bulb.

    #720774
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    I was hoping I would think of one before somebody asked.

    Sorry.

    Can you make one up?

    #720775
    ronrsr
    Member

    oh please, who let the 10-year old boys into the Coffee Room?

    #720776

    peer-pair

    poor-pour

    it takes four (two to) change a lightbulb

    #720777
    ronrsr
    Member

    There are a variety of answers to:

    How many homophones does it take to change a light bulb?

    the answer could be “won ore too.” or maybe “for” or could be “ate” or possibly “nun.”

    #720778
    metrodriver
    Member

    PBA; Originally. It’s a Polish joke. “How many Poles does it take to change a light bulb”?! Three. One to to hold the bulb. Two to twist the ladder! Another version. “Ten”. One to change the bulb. Nine to watch.

    #720779
    deiyezooger
    Member

    “oh please, who let the 10-year old boys into the Coffee Room?”

    huh?

    #720780
    ronrsr
    Member

    >>>oh please, who let the 10-year old boys into the Coffee Room?<<<

    I was referring to the tone of the jokes by mikehall and AOM. Definitely Heder Boy quality jokes.

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