Hilchos Shmiras Haloshon

“How do you know someone’s not the Gadol Hador because you got a bracha from him?”

That was kind of meant as a joke. Also, I’m just on a high because I just got a bracha from Rav Chaim Kanievsky, and felt a need to mention that. But actually, it is proof because Joseph was in New York on Shabbos so he couldn’t have possible have been in Bnei Brak this morning.

I find it hard to imagine that Rav Chaim said that, especially considering the way his wife related to not-Frum people. According to her biography, she got really upset and had to take medication when someone put down a girl for not being Frum.

What is your source so I can look it up?

I don’t have the sefer to look it up, and it’s not in hebrewbooks but I will try to find it when I have a chance, so I can see what he sees.

In any case, according to the Chofetz Chaim, even if someone is not in the category of “amisecha” it is still only permitted to speak L”H about him under certain conditions (which are usually not fulfilled). So even if Rav Chaim Kanievsky did in fact say that, that is probably what he meant.

A few important points about the above halacha:

1. There are other conditions that I haven’t yet brought, so don’t think this is the only one.

2. It seems to me that this is a very hard condition to fulfill. Before someone speaks L”H in such a case, he must analyze himself very carefully to determine if he is in fact fulfilling it. To speak negatively about somone but not to be speaking from hatred – it seems to me that in order to do this, a person has to: a) be on a very high level & b) be very self-aware.

3. Most importantly – the Chofetz Chaim specifically states that you are not allowed to be speaking from hatred. Not only that, but he says that nowadays we are not allowed to hate anyone even apikorsim. There are probably people in the world who do not have a hard time loving every Jew, and not bearing any hatred whatsoever towards any Jew.

However, I do not find it so easy. (and I would assume that there may be others like me). That is one of the reason that I have a hard time with all the posts trying to find sources for the permissibility of speaking badly of others or considering them apikorsim, etc. It doesn’t help me to love other Jews and I am afraid that it may cause me to have negative feelings towards them and to be more likely to treat them badly or speak badly of them w/o fulfilling all of the conditions or not treat them as well as I could as I am commanded to do, as per the Chofetz Chaim.

Even if it’s true that it is permitted to speak LH about not-Frum Jews in certain circumstances, it is not an obligation. However, it is an obligation to love every Jew and to do whatever I can for them. And it is a big aveira to have hatred towards any Jews. So can we try to find sources that will help me to keep the Mitzvah of loving all Jews as opposed to sources that may lead me to c”v sin in this area?

continuation from last post: “(Reproof must be administered with respect and understanding, and should be done in private whenever possible).

Generally speaking, one is required to interrupt and reprove the speaker of loshon hora, and do his best to ensure that he put a halt to his sinful speech.”

(ibid, Day 93)

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