Help with Tefila

For 13 years now, I’ve struggled with organized prayer. I really dont feel a strong connection for any of the tefilot that were written by others. More often than not, I say tefila just to be done and then have a real conversation with Hashem. I realize my own tefilot are not as perfect as the ones written by great Torah scholars, but they are the ones that really give me a good feeling and connection to Hashem.

I’ve learned the meaning of my tefilot, I’ve even tried saying them in English. I concetrate. They just dont feel like I am expressing myself. I feel like the words are stunted. I think tefila is very important, and I talk to Hashem all the time (in my own words) but I just cant get someone else’s words to mean what they should. I am starting to feel like “metoch lo leshma ba leshma” just really doesnt apply to me. How many years should it take? I came to this realization at 13 and here…13 years later…I still dont feel the connection.

Any advice on how to make tefila better for me?