Help At Home

I started this thread, because the “what are you cooking for Shabbos” thread was heading in this direction.

I feel that sometimes help is necessary, when there is a Simcha and the extra pair of hands are needed, or C’V if there is in illness in the family, and the family are unable to cope with the demands of the household and to be there for the family members.

For myself, when I did have help, I just felt I could not take over and trust someone. I would be hovering over the help making sure, they were doing the job right.

I remember just having my first baby, it was a few days before Pesach, and instead of resting in bed, I was making sure the Day worker, was cleaning the kitchen properly. I am of the mind, that if you want something done right, then do it yourself.

Then there is the trust factor. I had housekeepers growing up, my mom had to work, and help in my father’s store and it was necessary. I remember when, I was little, I had a collection of pennies, I was saving till I had a dollars worth, to give the change to my dad’s store. I also had a foreign coin collection. Well the housekeeper put all my coins into one bag. On counting my pennies, I noticed, there some were missing. I also was missing some of my foreign coins. I told my parents. My father called the day worker and had me bring her purse. He emptied out her pocket book in front of her. There were my foreign coins and other missing household item. He promptly took her home. I don’t think my parents had help since that incidence. My mother started to stay home a little more often.

When I had my twins, friends pitched in and helped me get a day worker. Things started to disapper. My friend lent me a children’s DVD that went missing. Gifts that I knew I had received double of(for my twins) suddenly I only had singles of. Like blankets, my friend gave me, Each had a different appalique, and one of the blankets was no were to be found. I kept the gifts underneath the crib.

Even Food was stolen, and I figured out how she may have stolen things. I went to through out something in a garbage bag she was preparing to throw out, and discovered a frozen steak in the garbage. By pretending to “throw things out” She was able to smuggle things this way.

I really have a serious trust issue. Nevermind the stories of friends who tell me to lock up the Pushkas (Charitiy boxe) because they will get stolen. I understand to hide jewelry. I never knew I had to lock up the food too.

teen- For your own sake- I hope you were kidding with your above comment. Think of all the mitzvot you can gain by helping your family around the house. Helping around the home is very important. Especially as a young person, you don’t understand the pressures adults have to maintain a household and to be able to afford to pay for the bare neccessites in life. Shelter & food. By helping you can aleve the pressure off your parents/family.

Moish, what is wrong with taking out the trash.??? some great rabbis have done so.

Mods- your not doing your job of keeping the threads on their topic- :(. So long. I really wish you would delete some of the comments. You don’t have to post this, but I am disappointed. I try to stay on topic most of the time, and usually get edited. Just seems some others think it’s fun to get out of topic. I wanted this to be a helpful topic for some.

How is this thread off-topic? The topic is “help at home”. It doesn’t specify whether we should be doing the help or whether we should hire help. The discussion has turned to asdfghjkl’s claim of having 2 housekeepers which is on the topic of “help at home”. Do you disagree?

syrian= All people are created in the image of Hashem. I think you lack respect for some people. You should really becareful with what you type.