happiness?

There are two issues to consider: happiness and productivity. As long as your lack of happiness isn’t causing you, over short-term or long-term, to not be a good Oveid Hashem then you can take your time working on happiness. Not everyone is meant to be bubbly all the time. If that is not the proper way for you to function and work properly then trying to do that will only hurt your productiveness. And of course, if you can identify what is holding you back then you can find a way to deal with it. Personally, I would never identify myself as a “happy” person. I had a rough childhood and recent events have caused me serious troubles. But I can function and be productive without being happy, and maybe some day I’ll figure out how to be happy too. If not being happy hurts how you serve Hashem then you have to try and fix it immediately though.

workinonit, from your post, I am guessing a cause of your happiness problem is due to things in your life that are troubling you, and it is difficult to let go of them. And of course, that is understandable. And many times, things we deal with have a bad habit of staying with us for a long time, and we just can’t shake them. So instead, it may be better for us to develop a new way of looking at these issues that can result in seeing them in a positive light. I am going to copy something I wrote in a another thread here, and hopefully it’ll help a little for you:

Many times, things look bad to us, we think there’s no end to our suffering, and we wonder “why me?”. But the truth is, we never know the full picture. Only G-d does. So we may be stuck on a few sharp puzzle pieces at the moment, but after a while, we see how the pieces fit together to create a beautiful scenic view. G-d gives us these challenges because He knows we, and not others, can deal with them, rise above them, and even become great because of them. We should consider ourselves lucky that G-d is giving us the opportunity early in our lives to show our loyalty to Him, to overcome obstacles, adversity, and evil. It is a path straight to G-d’s throne. Not everyone has that opportunity. Not everyone is given the chance to show loyalty to G-d so openly, so early in their lives, and so often. If we realize all this, then we can not only make it through the challenges we face, but even thrive on them. Be glad that we have such an amazing opportunity in our hands. That we are the lucky few that G-d chose to demonstrate to the Jewish nation, and to the world, how to live by, accept, and thrive on, G-d’s command. That we were chosen because we have something special in us, and G-d knows this, and He is giving us a way of using that special power so openly, it is almost as if He is talking to us, saying “Look at your potential! Here, I will now give an opportunity to reach that potential, to show others how to live!”

Hopefully, this will give you a new insight to dealing with things that are troubling you, and help you let go of them and enjoy life more fully.

Glad to hear you’re normal.

My father once (very wisely) explained to me that its ok to be happy. Even when the situation is hard or emotionally draining. Its ok to feel pain, we were created with emotions for a reason, but put it in the back of your head and just relax. Its ok to put a smile on your face and forget for a little bit.

One day when you aren’t busy with work/school, treat yourself. Maybe it means going shopping, maybe it means just being out in the fresh air and watching life happen around you, maybe it means sitting in bed with a good book and a cold drink, whatever does it for you.

Hatzlacha with everything.

*kapusta*