Funny Shidduch Stories

Some funny shidduch sto9ries.

Girl from manhattan is on a date with a guy from Brooklyn. He’s driving through an Italian area and is telling her about the neighborhood and the types of locals. All of a sudden he mmumbles something and runs out of the car. She’s all confused , has no idea where he went or why, and is really freaked cuz its not the greatest area. eventually he comes back and explains that he ran out to get his windshield wiper which had blown off. It was raining. P.S. they got married, and he still has the habit of mumbling domething on his way out , and she still often has no idea what he said until he comes back.

Another time girl is on a date and its a restaurant. woman in another table cant stop staring. guy explains that by coincidence the woman is a very close friend of his mother’s and she obviously finds the girl very interesting. Girl is mortified thinking every move she makes will be reported to the boy’s mother.

#3 Girl and boy go to a fastfood restaurant on the date. this was years ago when kosher fast food was a real innovation. girl has never eaten at a fast food restaurant. she orders the fried chicken and is surprised when they don’t provide cutlery. “I’m supposed to eat with my fingers”????

#4 Guy goes out on a first date. They sit in the girls brother’s house talking and hit it off right away, laughing and telling stories.after the date he calls his mother telling her he has lots of friends but never had so much fun in his life. ( this is after dating for several years.) mother says I’m glad but remember she’s a girl and if you let her know right away it might scare her away. At the second date the girl thinks he proposed bcuz she misunderstood some thing he said. she does freak out , but its strightened out. eventually they get engaged, when? on the third Date. no point in wasting any more time as they both feel its right. this is a very frum couple in yerushalayim. Girl calls her sister in the U.S. to announce the engagement and the sister freaks out. “you know a guy less than a week and you’re getting engaged.!!” Meanwhile the families are scheduled to meet and have a l’chaim. on the way the girl calls and says,” wait , I cant get engaged yet its too soon.” Mom says you know what , forget the l’chaim just go there to see her and have another date and discuss it,. He’s a Real yeshiveshe yeruhalmi guy who doesn’t drive ,so his parents drive him. its in another city. They get there with a giant bouquet of flowers for the erstwhile kallah which was already in the car. The table is set for a l’chaim but the couple just go out to talk things over. meanwhile the boy’s parents are invited in. (can’t make them sit in the car) Girls father comes home from minyan in the shul and exclaims mazel tov. only to be told there’s no mazel tov yet. (he was in shul when U.S sister freaked out the kalla.) So while the couple is out the machatonim have a fun time eating herring and cake and getting to know eeach other. the couple really get engaged a few weeks later and this time the L’chaim is in the boy’s house because the girls parents already did that.

My shadchan told me that my wife said yes when in fact, she had said no. She was too nice to tell me no to my face when I called and the rest is history.

Truly funny story, and as much as I know you hate the bungalow scene, I have a return story for you (not on shidduchim, but still funny)

Person A makes arraingments to have a goyta clean her bungalow prior to A’s arrival (no sense in wasting time cleaning when there’s so much fun to be had)

Arrival day comes, and A is horrified (horrified!) to see her unit a total wreck (squirrel droppings, leaves, dust, ect)

Person B on the other hand (the person inthe attached unit), is thrilled to see that her unit has been cleaned to perfection.

The goyta cleaned the wrong unit!

No, and the story I know of happened years (as in 20+) ago. The person to whom it happened (he was Mr. A, unfortunatly) is now in his 60’s so unless that’s who you know, it happened twice (which would not surprise me at all)

My in-laws know Person B.

Person B was trying to convince Person A that paying for cleaning help is a waste as she could do a better job herself.

Person A warned Person B that she will regret it.

She didn’t!

Just discovered this thread so I though I’d share my worst and best dating stories:

The worst was that a co-worker had a friend from out of town he thought might be a match. She was visiting friends in NJ for Shabat (I live in the Bronx) so he suggesed we meet after Shabat. I called her up and suggested several restaurants in Manhattan, all of which she vetoed because they weren’t certified by the local kashrut vaad. My attempts to explain that Manhattan didn’t *have* a local kashrut vaad fell on deaf ears.

So we agreed to meet at a hotel lobby in New Jersey. I warned her that it might take some time for me to drive there because of the likelihood of traffic over the George Washington Bridge. Well, there was no traffic on the bridge so I arrived 40 minutes early! And when I arrived I discovered that the hotel was hosting the annual banquet of the Palestinian-American Solidarity Committee!!! Here I was, cooling my heels in my yarmulke, surrounded by hundreds of Palestinian activists. And my date was almost an hour late. When she finally arrived she apologized but started telling me about the great right wing talk show host she had been listening to on the way. As anyone who is a regular reader of the comment forums here might guess, I would not find myself in agreement with right wing talk show hosts. The date sort of went downhill from there. That was my first and last hotel lobby date.

—

About a year later a different woman from out of town contacted me on frumster.com. She had been attracted by exactly the honest stuff that shadchanim had told me not to tell any prospective partner. We corresponded by email, snail mail, and phone for five weeks before finally meeting. Before meeting, she talked with my rav, and I talked with two of her rabbis. By this point we were certain we were compatible; we just weren’t sure whether there would be chemistry. Her hashkafa is a bit to my right and her politics are a bit to my left, but our differences were not so great as to be incompatible. Well when we finally met we hit it off instantly (fortunately one of her rabbis had given each of us the shomer negiah lecture before we met in person!) and we were engaged the second time we met in person. We were married three months later and are still married 5 1/2 years later. 🙂 We are frumster match #152.

Arc

Did that really happen to you? Wow.

The story is that my mother told my father when he picked her up for a date that she didn’t eat supper yet. My father said politely “That’s OK I will wait!!” She had to explain to my father, no when a girl says that it means she wants to go out to eat!!!

They are married for 30 yrs KAH

lol doc. She definitely stuck her foot all the way in! How was the rest of the date?

It kept getting better.

When I was letting her into the car we saw some of her friends. Being the gentleman that I am I said, “Oh, I’m sorry, I hope you’re not embarrassed”. She said it was fine since she only gets embarrassed when she’s seen with dorks.

Later on we were walking in Battery Park and she saw some more friends. “Oh no”, she said, “I can’t believe I just saw some people I know, I’m soooooo embarrassed!”

Ouch! She couldn’t figure out how to get her foot out and had to hop to the car.

The story goes like this..

My uncle was ready to propose to my Israeli aunt(then she didn’t speak such good English).

He asks her ” Will you take my hand in marriage?” She replied “What does Marriage mean!!!

She score a 9.5 for the quick “eat out” recovery, but lost 2 for the battery park slip. I would have deducted 3, but battery park shares the same initals as Boro Park, so I was leinient.

This goes back to 1991-1992. Was waiting for my car with the girl I was with in a parking garage near Rockefeller Center in NYC. We were looking at an advertisement for a show when we heard a voice behind us “isnt that a shaina panim?”. We turned around and there was Freddy Roman, whose show was the advertisement we were reading. We kibbitzed for about 2 minutes until his car came (even though I did get to the garage first!), and before he got into the car he wished me and my wife a good night. the girl turned all shades of red and asked me if I was proposing to her (turns out she thought I put him up to it). Thats when I turned all shades of red and told her I had no intention of doing so.

Not necessarily in the order that it occurred-

We were discussing the topic of yeshiva life and she asked me how I can possibly share a room with three other roommates, “I’d never be able to sleep in the same room as another person, I mean, what if they want the window open and I don’t? Or the other way around? That’s why me and my siblings all have our own rooms”.

(“Now if you’ll hold on for a second while I try to fit my other foot in my mouth as well…”)

Also in BP (Battery Park)- Looking out over the river we saw Ellis Island, and we discussed our ancestors and which ones came through the island. I never heard this term before (I learned about it afterwards) but there is something called yichus briefs, well she brought it up but replaced the “yichus” part with “family”. Without getting into too much detail, let’s just say there were a couple of uncomfortable moments until I realized that her questions must have been referring to something else.

I’ll try to think of some more but this happened many years ago.

“aren’t you worried that she’s reading your posts and she’s very embarrassed?”

Precisely why I am not sharing any stories 😉

Lol Dr pepper. You’ve got some self esteem there!

I”m just taking a vote here, how many of you guys back when you were dating forgot exactly where you parked your car?

In a place like NYC? ……..Anyone? ……..Never?!!

I thought so! Me neither! 😉

Someone was asking for a reference for a girl (who has thinnish hair), and one person said “she is a great girl, and the only chisaron maybe that she has is that she doesn’t have great hair.” The boy really was not interested bec. he once went out with someone who had real frizzy hair and it was awful! Anyway as he went up to the house he was already thinking its not going to be, and wasa absolutely terrified how the girl would look. Anyway he opened the door and took a cautious peek….and now they are happily married B”H. Just goes to show how you have to be careful when giving over info!

smartcookie- the interesting thing is that the person who was giving over the info meant to say good- that she is great and if you are looking for a chisaron this is it! B”H the boy had the seichol to go out anyway:)

Would a guy even know what “great hair” means? Why bother with something that will only confuse him? Worse, scare him!

popa_bar_abba says;

Yes, a friend of mine was on a date and the girl tripped. He reflexively put out his arm to catch her. So the lunatic girl maced him.

b_h says Ha! Ha! Ha! LOL!!! Lucky guy, I got tazered!

So I forgot my wallet! big deal!

I came out of the shower left it on the bed, as I was rushing,

(i’m usually on time……………………..occasionally)

I realized in the lounge in middle of the date, by me the girl had nothing on her. So I asked her if she would be fine w/ making

a run for it when we were done, she was cool with it, but I ended up calling a friend having him drive down with some cash.

If this gives me away too bad, I have too many stories,

it’s about time I shared.

sac; That’s it, no more stories. 😉

I was out with my kids on chol hamoed and we bumped into one of their teachers, on a date, with a neighbor of ours.

charliehall-

Thanks for the compliment, I’m honored to receive the title from a bio-stat professor.

Just out of curiosity- from all the things I’ve posted- why was it that last post that earned the compliment?