Funny Shidduch Stories

I just reminded myself of a funny story that happened to a

friend of mine, so he was on this date and they were discussing

many topics (like in the CR)and one was the shidduch crises,

they were talking bout how there’s many girla perfectly normal

who mamish dont get offers for months at a time, & how there’s

many more girls then boys etc.. so the after some more of this

he sighed saying, nu, what’re you gonna do? (rhetorically)

and she answered.. “Nothing!” (in a monotonous voice.)

(I still remember the way he said it)

He thought she didn’t chap but later on in a different

conversation he also made the same remark

nu, what’re you gonna do? & she replied again.. “Nothing!”

He thought it was hilarious & told me later.

Till today we joke around & whenever one of us says

well..what’re you gonna do?

The other replies a monotonous “Nothing!”

That was a great story ames. Thanks for sharing it.

The Doc and I were laughing so hard when we read it together last night.

He actually felt bad that someone outdid his proposal but I’m actually relieved that he didn’t think of that. 🙂

I heard a really funny shidduch story that happened to my friend’s sister. She was in seminary and she needed a place to stay for shabbos. So she called her cousin who she frequented often on Thursday night and asked if she should come. Her cousin told her “I’d love to have you, there’s just one small problem. My husband invited over five guys from yeshiva and they’re all really frum and would feel extremely uncomfortable if there’s a single seminary girl there.” My friend’s sister told her she really had nowhere else to go so her cousin told her to come for shabbos anyway and maybe they could figure out some arrangements for her for that meal.

Anyway, come Friday night and my friend’s sister had not found another place to go for the meal. So she and her cousin came up with a great idea. They realized the boys would not be uncomfortable if she was a married woman. So her cousin gave her a tichel and an old housecoat and told her to put it on and keep a straight face the entire meal. She sat next to her cousin and pretended to be nebach an almanah or divorcee. Okay, they manage to keep straight faces the whole meal and none of the guys notice anything strange. One of them even makes sure to be extra polite and kept making sure the food was passed to her and stuff. They are literally holding back from plotzing the entire time and her cousin kept covering up her tittering with lame excuses about finding her husband’s devar torah funny or whatever. Anyway none of the boys notice anything strange. after they leave, my friend’s sister, her cousin and husband plopped on the couch and laughed for about 45 minutes. after they calmed down the cousin realized that she needed a pillow for her guest and didn’t have any because the previous week she had given some out for someone making a simcha and didn’t get them back. So she sent my friend’s sister to a neighbour to borrow a pillow.

To make a long story short, the neighbor met my friend’s sister and was talking to her for a few minutes. She decided that she had a shidduch for my friend’s sister. she told her that she was a bit young and wasn’t dating yet she wanted to wait till she was done seminary. anyway, a couple of months later they went out… and you guessed it, in walks the guys who was being really polite to her at the table. He almost fainted then and there and so did she. But as soon as she told him the story he thought it was hilarious…..

They’re married with a kid!

Onion Breath, that’s precious!!! It speaks to the essence of Shidduchin: Sheker Dover, Kesef Notel.

;

hey- that’s crazy 🙂 but funny

Why couldn’t they eat in the kitchen? They had to put up a purim shpiel?

Why’d she dress as a nebach, why not just a normal married woman?

There are no more questions at this time your honor

Onion Breath-

Great story.

Personally, once someone goes from sheitel to snood or vice-versa I don’t even recognize them.

This isn’t really a dating story since it happened while we were married but this wonderful topic has become a mais mitzvah so I’m going to post it anyway.

When I was interviewing for the job I have now I was told that I wouldn’t be allowed to take off for Chol Hamoed. When Pesach came around my supervisor told me that if I have enough off days left he’ll let me take off for the whole Chol Hamoed provided that I log in every morning and answer all e-mails from the previous day. I thought it was very generous but my wife didn’t think it was fair to have to do work on an off day.

For part of Yom Tov we were staying by my parents. One morning my wife came down stairs, sat down on the couch and started talking with my mother and grandmother. After a few minutes she started wondering when I was going to be home from Shachris. My grandmother told her that I already came home and was working in the basement. Looking right at my mother she said, “I really don’t know why he’s doing this if he’s not getting paid for it”. My mother was very taken aback and my grandmother was rolling her eyes while muttering something in Yiddish which my wife didn’t understand.

So my wife came down to the basement to find me but I wasn’t in front of the computer. Then she heard some banging in the laundry room and found me lying under the sink with a whole bunch of tools. “What are you doing?” she asked. “Oh, the faucet was leaking so my mother asked me replace the faulty valve…”

Doc, thanks for reviving this thread.

Joseph, any good stories to share?

Doc- this place is gonna need your Phd if you persist with these stories 😉

That’s “splanin” Lucy

She’s fine. Still taking her Vitameatavegamin.

Dr. Pepper-

Great story!

You should sent it into Readers Digest (get the payment in cash, since they’re in bankruptcy).

One small problem – you may be in a bit of trouble:

“Didn’t we have an agreement that we’re not going to discuss things here?

Alternately, 1-800-grovels usually works)

ICOT, you know you may be kicking up some shalom bayis trouble here…;)

Dr. Pepper, it is amazing how you are a never ending source of side-splitting stories! I’m still waiting for you to contact me about that book offer we spoke about.

mepal-

Punkt farkert!

I’m suggesting the refuah before the makah.

Is that the new & improved squeaky speaking?

sounds like the same squeak I’ve heard in the past. Anyone’s got some WD40 to spare?

I can only try-

I don’t think I’m in any trouble- it’s something we both agreed on; I don’t either know why I was doing it if I wasn’t getting paid!

squeak- I’m still waiting for your review and blurb, then we can talk.

areivim,

Not you. Mepal.

You are the one who came next….

P.S. that is why I wrote that I meant it in good fun

You’re welcome squeak. Actually I don’t think areivim realized why that nickname might offend.

squeak, that’s the attitude we need around here. Would you like to teach that to some newbies around?

k, splain please why squeaky is more offensive than I thought

areivim, I am one of those individuals. Don’t worry.

wasn’t I? ;);)

omg, I would’ve burst out laughing! You’re good, NF!