Funny Shidduch Stories

this one isnt really funy but its intresting

a guy was driving a girl back home after a date and when they stopped at a red she pulled the key out waited for the car to turn green then red again before putting it back in

the guy could only stare in shock and after she put it back he just continued driving

after a minute she said i pulled the key out to see how you deal with a stressful situation and if you could hold your anger in

you passed with flying colors

he pulled over to the side leaned over opened her door anmd said “you failed, get ouot”

no idea if its true but i think its kind of intresting…not all that funny tho

Gosh I have so many but would not the boy in question to identify himself from my post 😉

i guess i could add this here too:

so a regular flatbush guy, goes on a date with a boro park bais yaakov girl!!! the guy sees they have absolutely nothing in common, & just keeps driving on the date without sayin a word!!! the girl starts talkin about her learning on the phone nightly, over the phone with her chavrusa!!! she’s going on & on about learning with her chavrusah meselos yesharim!!! then she asks her date,if he ever learned meselos yesharim!!! his reply-i watched the movie!!!

A boy and girl were going out for a while, and the boy decided the shidduch is not for him. He decided he wanted to speak to the girl personally since they had already met so many times. He started by mentioning her positive qualities and then he said he has something very serious to discuss. To which the girl said “I cant believe i am about to get engaged.”

P.S. he was won over and they are happily married with a couple of kids!!

I did not hear this story firsthand, but i think its true.

A friend of mine drove down a flight of stairs on a dare (and it was the girl’s 1st ever date)

How you ask? It was Yerushalayim on one of the streets which turn into a staircase at the end. This one did not have a barrier

anonymouse1079 and anonymouse1079, those are both sooo Embarrassing !!!!

On one of my dates, the poor guy ran out of quarters for tolls and didn’t have easy pass… so he had to honk his horn for 10 second by EACH TOLL! and we must have gone through at least 10! it was really really embarrassing!

and it gets better… my friend retold this story on a date… and they both laughed… until my friend’s date ALSO ran out of quarters… and the joke was on hiM!!!

A couple once went on a shidduch, and who did they see on the other side of the room? The girl’s really close friend! As they were walking in, the friend happened to lift her head! So they both saw each other

=)

What do you do when you’re on a d8 and ya just happen to bump into a few girls you know, doing the same thing you are?

I just smile and wave. seriously.

Ok, in a way that the date won’t notice it.

oh man, I hope the dude who did this wont read this…..

what would you do if the guy forgot to turn on his headlights at nt? You notice this as you’re abt to careen into a divider on a dimly lit bridge, after almost missing an exit and almost crashing into a tree… I was prayin….

Gosh, what to do? Do i act like his mommy and thus make him feel bad by asking if his headlights are on?

My tactic was to ask why the streets were so dimly lit that it was impossible to read the tiny street signs! Aha! Dude eventually realizes it may be s/th he can fix!

I firmly beleive that there are important reasons why Hashem leads us through the whole Yam Suf parsha before splitting it. There’s lots to learn abt ourselves and each d8 is a fresh opportinty. ON that note, im gonna start a new thread w a few practical things for dating…

a girl was walking with her date and suddenly her very very high heel gets stuck in the metal grate in the street.

That’s like walking with high heels on the boardwalk. It took me getting my heel stuck in between the slats each step, until I figured out how to synchronize my steps to avoid the gaps… 😉

Asdfghjkl: THATS HYSTERICAL

I was out on a blind date with a fellow who was given my number without my knowledge or permission (or my parents’ knowledge, either). I agreed to the date a) because he didn’t know that I had not been asked if it was ok to give out my number and b) because the person who gave him my number meant well, was a family friend, and I didn’t want to embarrass her. I basically was told the guy was going to call, the day that he called me.

He picked me up and took me out to dinner, which was very nice, but I knew after a short while I had no intentions of seeing this guy again. What really brought it home to me, was when we were getting ready to leave and he asked me to leave by the back door, because his ex-girlfriends’ parents were in the restaurant, and he didn’t want to be seen with me! Stupid and ever-accommodating me, I waited for him outside the back door (yes, he did show up), instead of reading him the riot act for treating me so disrespectfully.

Another date was a very nice person, who had called me up, we had a very pleasant conversation, which he ended by telling me he would pick me up at 5 PM “after dinner.”

On the appointed day, I dressed nicely, and when he picked me up, he asked me if I was milchig or fleishig. I told him I was neither. Puzzled, he asked me what I had eaten for dinner, and I told him the truth. Nothing. So he said, “But I thought I told you I was picking you up at 5PM after dinner!” And I sweetly replied, “That’s true. You did. But neither you nor anyone else can tell me when to feel hungry. I generally do not eat dinner at 4 PM!” He realized immediately how he had come across and took me out for pizza (fine by me, I am not the greedy type). During dinner, he admitted that he hadn’t wanted to take me anywhere to eat until he saw if I would be worth it. I have had some really interesting shidduch dates. B”H that is not how I met my husband.

oboy

Joseph – why oh why did I know that I would get that comment from you. You’re so predicatable.

just heard this one…a guy and girl went on a boat ride the wind started to drift him farther away from the dock than he’d like…do he tried to row back toward the boat rental. he’s trying, and shvitzing, and trying, and shmaltzing but he cant d=fight the wind. so he decides to let the wind push him to shore and let the bpat rental guy worry about getting his own boat back…the make it to shore. he put the oar into the ground to steady the boat and lets the girl get out first…not realizing she gets out into a pile of mud knee deep. she can’t get out and they guy doesnt know what to do to help her…he gets out of the boat steadies himself and the boat and hands her the oar. she manages to pull her leg out of the mud but her shoe is missing. she hopped back to the car muddy and shoeless. I can only imagine the lok on her/her parents face when she finally made it home… and no they did not end up together.

wow, keep ’em coming! These stories are hysterical! (especially since they didn’t happen to me, lol)

mchemtob, you still gotta feel bad for all those involved in that story;

Come on oomis, time to spill 🙂

I never had any bad dating stories. My husband and I didn’t “date” that much, just sort of rolled into our relationship from being friends.

i definitely feel bad but everytime the guy tells the story everyone cries from laughing so hard, it’s just one of those stories that is too crazy to be true, but it is.

I was once on a date and as I was switching lanes (in manhattan) I came really close to hitting a taxi cab. She started laughing hyterically.

There is the time I arrived an hour early. I asked if I should come back later. The father sat with me for an hour. We did have some common ground to shmooze about.

“I was once on a date and as I was switching lanes (in manhattan) I came really close to hitting a taxi cab. She started laughing hyterically.”

Might have been nervous laughter. Many people experience this when in a momentarily scary situation.

“There is the time I arrived an hour early. I asked if I should come back later. The father sat with me for an hour. We did have some common ground to shmooze about. “

Lesson for the future – sit in your car around the corner, but don’t arrive too early.

I apologize, but there is absolutely no way that I can tell this entire story without it being moderated. The irony is there is nothing wrong in the story whatsoever. I’ll try to give the highlights. It was actually something that my date said…

What I can say is that we stood on line for over an hour waiting to get into somewhere, and he was trying to calculate (aloud and very precisely) how long it would take us to get in, based on the number of people and probable seating capacity per capita (whatever THAT meant to him). The fellow was an actuary and very numbers conscious. He also wanted to show me his math thesis, which he just happened to have with him.

When we were almost ready to leave, we each excused ourselves for a few minutes, and I returned right away, but 10, 15, 20, 30 Minutes go by and he has not come out. There were no other people that were appropriate for me to ask to check if he was inside the “facilities,” so I ended up calling my dad, O”H to pick me up, because my date apparently had ditched me. While I was on the phone with my father, the guy emerges from the restroom, no explanations, no excuses (I just asked him if he was ok), and acted like this was typical behavior.

He drove me home, and I did something I have never done on even my most boring dates. I did not ask him in for coffee (I always asked my dates if they wanted coffee, so they would be alert on the drive home, and most accepted graciously), and as we approached my house, I told him he could let me off at the corner, because I wanted to take a shortcut through the back yard. I don’t want to say anything bad about the guy, but he was very, very strange, and spoke in a really whiney voice.

oomis1105: ha kinda funny one there!!!

Well oomis,

1) Definitely nervous laughter.

2)I didn’t know I was an hour early until her father pointed it out. there better not be a future!!!

syriansephardi, Didn’t marry either of them. The stories of dating my wife are for another time, perhaps.