Engagement Challenges

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  • #615449
    sn1234
    Member

    No matter how long your engagement is, it always proves to be a challenging time for the chosson & kallah. What are ways to make it less awkward and uncomfortable? Also, how many times is is suggested that they meet/speak?

    #1071099
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    Some tips:

    Short engagement.

    Minimize contact.

    No texting.

    Minimize contact.

    Always keep in mind that it’s easy to misunderstand each other, so be careful what you say, how you say it, and how you interpret what the other says.

    Minimize contact (did I mention that already?)

    #1071100
    Joseph
    Participant

    +1 for DY.

    (If you want a long engagement than you should change from minimize contact to eliminate contact.)

    #1071101
    takahmamash
    Participant

    Minimize and/or eliminate contact towards what end?

    #1071102
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    Minimize towards the goal of reducing unnecessary tension, friction, and misunderstanding, and having fewer aveiros.

    #1071103
    BarryLS1
    Participant

    Is it better to have tension, friction, and misunderstandings after the marriage?

    #1071104
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    I guess you agree to the aveiros part. This itself might override your concerns.

    I disagree with your concerns, though. A lot of the relationship issues are based on ????? ??? ?”? ???? ????????, so I disagree with your implication that contact during the engagement would diminish the problems which can occur afterwards.

    I don’t think the relationship can fully develop until ???? ????????, and trying to do so, too much, too early, is detrimental.

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