Home › Forums › Shidduchim › Lost Dor Yesharim ID Number
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December 1, 2013 12:24 am at 12:24 am #611435No One Mourns The WickedMember
Hi All,
My DY identification number has been misplaced. I know that they have ironclad rules in terms of releasing ID numbers even when other evidence is presented…
How does one go about being retested?
1) Does DY refer participants to a specific lab that automatically sends them the vials?
2) Am I responsible for transporting the vials to DY?
3) How long does the process take from when DY receives the vials to when then can issue me a new ID number?
4) What does this process cost?
Anyone with prior personal experience- please comment!
Thanks and Happy Chanukah!
December 1, 2013 12:34 am at 12:34 am #1141010🍫Syag LchochmaParticipantHi, btw!
I was under the impression they took your social security number for this very reason.
December 1, 2013 12:41 am at 12:41 am #1141011No One Mourns The WickedMemberSyag,
I wish….I heard (from friends and family) that they will not release the information other than with the ID number due to extreme confidentiality concerns…
Someone tell me I’m wrong..
December 1, 2013 1:22 am at 1:22 am #1141012☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantCall them and find out.
DY (no relation)
December 1, 2013 1:30 am at 1:30 am #1141013nishtdayngesheftParticipantWhy don t you just call them. Unless you are not interested in accurate information. Then I understand why you you would ask here. Because asking a question on a blog is guaranteed to supply you with accurate information.
December 1, 2013 1:45 am at 1:45 am #1141014Veltz MeshugenerMemberSounds like a scam. They won’t tell you anything other than whether you are compatible, which means nothing about any individual’s health, but they make you pay again if you lose your number?
December 1, 2013 1:52 am at 1:52 am #1141015☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantVM, the point isn’t to find out about an individual’s health, it’s to prevent the agmas nefesh of children with serious conditions.
If you want to find out about an individual’s status as a carrier, you can go to a private lab.
December 1, 2013 1:53 am at 1:53 am #1141016yitzman1MemberWhy don’t you call them?
December 1, 2013 5:20 am at 5:20 am #1141017SaysMeMemberi’ve heard one case at least where someone lost her number but called n didnt have to retake. try it first
December 1, 2013 3:12 pm at 3:12 pm #1141018No One Mourns The WickedMemberI called, the test must be taken over…
As far as my aforementioned concerns- I’m simply looking for people who have had past experiences to let me know what the process was like……obviously I’m not looking for final answers here.
December 1, 2013 3:42 pm at 3:42 pm #1141019Derech AgavParticipantthey officially take a few telephone #s and answer to just what they have on record.
do they organize info like tht?
they should be able to tell you what you need to know if they are telling you that you have to be retested…
or you can go to a HS and do when they do and maybe youll be able to get that cost price also.
maybe try the schools in your neighborhood.
hatzlacha!
December 1, 2013 3:48 pm at 3:48 pm #1141020yitzchokmParticipantI dint get it.
What’s the point in giving your social if you can’t use it to get your results?
December 1, 2013 4:15 pm at 4:15 pm #1141021yeshivaguy45ParticipantOn my dor yesharim sheet, it says that if you submitted your social security number at the time of testing, then you can retrieve it that way if you lose the number. However it may take 2-3 days.
December 1, 2013 4:30 pm at 4:30 pm #1141022yitzchokmParticipantso the question is, did No One Mourns The Wicked submit the application with his SS#?
December 1, 2013 5:02 pm at 5:02 pm #1141023imamomMemberMy son lost his DY number. We were able to submit his Soc Security number and get a his DY number. BUT DY was adamant that they could not absolutely guarantee that the number that they gave us was in fact his correct DY number (even with the social). The only way to guarantee that it would be the correct DY number would be to have the blood work done again and a new number issued. That’s what we were told 4 years ago….don’t know if something has changed since.
December 1, 2013 8:05 pm at 8:05 pm #1141024writersoulParticipantimamom: they would seriously give you a number they weren’t 100% sure was yours?
That’s actually shocking. It defeats the purpose of the whole venture and is such a sakana.
December 2, 2013 1:28 am at 1:28 am #1141025no longer need seminaryMembersyag lachochma- your dor yesharim number is your social security number?
December 2, 2013 2:00 am at 2:00 am #1141026🍫Syag LchochmaParticipantneed seminary help – No, but I know my kids had to submit their SS#’s and I thought my daughter was told that it was to have an alternative means of identification. They would use the SS# to find your DY number.
December 2, 2013 2:08 am at 2:08 am #1141027Smile E. FaceMemberWhen i did it, they said the SS# could be used instead… If that’s not actually true, then a lot of us our going to have a problem…
December 2, 2013 2:15 am at 2:15 am #1141028🍫Syag LchochmaParticipantSmile E. Face – You heard that too, huh? Well aint that a coincidence 🙂
December 2, 2013 2:21 am at 2:21 am #1141029dullradianceParticipantIf you have the cancelled check used to pay for the original test, let the DY people know. That may also be a way of identifying yourself.
December 2, 2013 6:59 am at 6:59 am #1141030–ParticipantIf you want to find out about an individual’s status as a carrier, you can go to a private lab.
If you have results from another source, you are ineligible to use DY’s services.
Individuals who are engaged, married, already tested, or otherwise aware of their carrier status are not eligible to participate in this program.
December 2, 2013 3:37 pm at 3:37 pm #1141031Huh? You lost your Dor Yesharim number? You can use mine. Mods please give the OP my Dor Yesharim number.
And the rest of you are such a bunch of selfish jerks for not offering. Wheres your bein adam l’chaveiro? This is why rebbi akivas students died. Its clearly ?? ???? ??? ?? ???. You people sicken me.
December 2, 2013 3:39 pm at 3:39 pm #1141032the-art-of-moiParticipantMy sister lost her Dor Yesharim number too and they gave it to her after she gave them her ss number… And that happened just this year!
December 2, 2013 4:56 pm at 4:56 pm #1141033ED IT ORParticipantJust post your social security number and name and address here and we will post the dy number straight out!
🙂
December 2, 2013 6:28 pm at 6:28 pm #114103564bitsomethingParticipantThey were very clear with Dor Yeshorim: The whole purpose of giving your SSN is in case you lose the ID number. Seems pretty logical to me that the SSN can be used in its stead.
If you want to be retested, then just look at your local yeshivas. Most Beis Midrashim do Dor Yesharim every other year. Ask around. (Yeshivas are cheaper, about $150 if I remember correctly)
December 2, 2013 6:30 pm at 6:30 pm #1141036popa_bar_abbaParticipantAlso, in colleges they come around and do it for like free. So go to a college.
December 2, 2013 6:34 pm at 6:34 pm #1141037👑RebYidd23ParticipantWhy don’t they use only your social?
December 2, 2013 6:36 pm at 6:36 pm #1141038popa_bar_abbaParticipantSo that you don’t have to give your social out to everyone you date
December 2, 2013 6:44 pm at 6:44 pm #1141039👑RebYidd23ParticipantThey don’t need to remember it forever.
December 2, 2013 6:48 pm at 6:48 pm #114104064bitsomethingParticipantIf I were to take a guess, it’s because of how the system works:
Bottle are preprinted with a serial number, aka your ID — that same ID is on the card you get. They can’t preprint a bunch of social security numbers.
It’s a backup plan. The guy even said you can use any numbers you want, as they cross-reference it with your birthday.
December 2, 2013 6:53 pm at 6:53 pm #1141041imamomMemberwriter’s soul: yes, the dor yeshorim can be retrieved with a social security number. BUT they are soooo not happy about it that they told me that they couldn’t guarantee that it was in fact the correct number. That is their disclaimer. That is their legal right, to make a disclaimer. I am confident, though, that the DY number that we used while my son was dating was in fact the correct number. Because I gave them the correct SS# (I also had a cancelled check somewhere with the number, but that was actually harder to locate in my not such great record keeping system). No sakana. If we were concerned about sakana, then we would go to a lab and find out our own carrier status and proceed accordingly. But heck, then that would defeat the purpose of DY. The only reason that we do DY is because this is what the gedolim said we should do. As pointed out, if one has gotten this info from other sources, then one cannot participate in the DY program. Calm down, writer’s soul, no worries!
December 2, 2013 7:34 pm at 7:34 pm #1141042popa_bar_abbaParticipantFTR: I wrote my DY num down on my passport. That worked.
December 2, 2013 8:04 pm at 8:04 pm #1141043writersoulParticipantimamom: what I meant by a sakana is if they were to give you a number without being 100% sure it was his- the way you put it now makes it sound more like a disclaimer, which even in this case I don’t think is right- if you have even the slightest safek, retest. The point of Dor Yeshorim is comparison of genetic markers in the two specific people potentially having children together. If they have genetic markers that give them a chance of having children with a disease, they are meant to be dissuaded. While you’re probably right that your son did receive the correct number, if for whatever reason he did not and you received a lovely shidduch for him with a girl who has a recessive gene that is only a problem if your son has the same recessive gene, if Dor Yeshorim gave you the wrong number, the number of a boy or girl who does not have the recessive gene, then if your son does have the gene without you or Dor Yeshorim knowing, you’re up the creek without a paddle. It’s always kedai to know exactly why you’re doing things, and Dor Yeshorim’s attitude about this is kind of disheartening. The fact is that the sakana is really the reason why you should do it in the first place- if you’re not worried about the possibility of FD or Tay Sachs then just save yourself the money. If they ADMIT that there may be even the slightest chance of a mixup, then what’s the point of the whole thing?
Hence my (seeming?) overreaction. While it probably is nothing, the whole lackadaisical attitude really gets me nervous.
I’m not thrilled about this de facto monopoly in which I can’t even get myself tested, apparently. You’re entirely at the mercy of their system. I personally don’t care about the stigma of having a recessive Tay Sachs gene (if I have one, wouldn’t know)- the point is that it’s recessive and doesn’t mean anything unless the guy also has it. So what’s the stigma? We all have recessive genes for things that will never matter in a million years, and there’s no stigma in that. We all have genes for things that we don’t even know are controlled by genes.
For a gene that is dominant and possibly even affecting the person him/herself, I can understand- I know someone who’s going through that nisayon now, but she needs to be even MORE careful about telling people because for her it’s a real thing that will actually affect her kids. For a recessive gene that will only MAYBE affect your children under certain circumstances, I really don’t understand all the hush-hush.
If there was a way to opt out of Dor Yeshorim specifically without causing a sakana, I would, but I guess I’m stuck in the monopoly.
PBA: I lost my passport so I don’t think that would help me…
December 2, 2013 8:24 pm at 8:24 pm #1141044popa_bar_abbaParticipantI wrote it on parchment and affixed it to my doorposts.
December 2, 2013 11:40 pm at 11:40 pm #1141045No One Mourns The WickedMemberUpdate: They called me back- I can use my S.S number….I don’t know why one person gave me contradicting info. The caveat is that I need to have them call my house and have someone pick up and verify my cell phone number bec that’s the number in their system.
Thank you everyone for your advice/comments.
December 3, 2013 4:09 am at 4:09 am #1141046Smile E. FaceMemberSyag-I know, crazy, right?
December 3, 2013 2:04 pm at 2:04 pm #1141047Torah613TorahParticipantJust put it on your shidduch resume.
December 3, 2013 2:15 pm at 2:15 pm #1141049☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantIt should be watermarked on the photo.
December 3, 2013 2:31 pm at 2:31 pm #1141050Feif UnParticipantI think I once wrote this here before, but I’ll post it again.
My wife was living in Israel, but had come to the US to date. We started going out, and we hit it off pretty quickly. Then I discovered she’d never had the Dor Yesharim testing done. We didn’t know what to do. We liked each other and knew it was heading towards our getting engaged – should we wait for her to get tested? She called her father in Israel, and he went to ask R’ Chaim Kanievsky. R’ Chaim answered him, “You know, I never got tested by Dor Yesharim either!” My FIL replied, “Ok, but what should they do? Should they wait?” R’ Chaim said, “No, she shouldn’t get tested. I give them a bracha that all their children should be healthy!”
December 3, 2013 7:47 pm at 7:47 pm #1141051RedlegParticipantI’m sorry, what’s the big deal about getting retested? Do they charge a lot for retest?
December 3, 2013 8:12 pm at 8:12 pm #1141052WolfishMusingsParticipantI’m sorry, what’s the big deal about getting retested? Do they charge a lot for retest?
To me, it sounds like you cannot be retested. From the regulations quoted above (emphasis mine):
Individuals who are engaged, married, already tested, or otherwise aware of their carrier status are not eligible to participate in this program.
The Wolf
December 3, 2013 8:48 pm at 8:48 pm #1141053popa_bar_abbaParticipantI think that means already tested by someone else and knows results. Its to prevent people figuring out status.
December 4, 2013 12:13 am at 12:13 am #1141054☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantPopa, did they have this policy when they only tested for Tay-Sach’s? If so, that reason doesn’t make sense.
December 6, 2013 10:18 am at 10:18 am #1141056–ParticipantI think that means already tested by someone else and knows results. Its to prevent people figuring out status.
The cynic in me says it’s to maintain a monopoly.
December 6, 2013 12:49 pm at 12:49 pm #1141057popa_bar_abbaParticipantThe cynic in you is an idiot because that makes no sense. Just what circumstance can you imagine under which someone would want to be retested and they would have a business reason to refuse?
DY: right, probably they didn’t have that policy then.
Another possible reason for that policy is that they are subsidized by donors, and do not want to waste their resources on duplicate testing.
December 6, 2013 2:04 pm at 2:04 pm #1141058☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantPopa, I disagree with you. This policy prevents people from using independent labs to begin with. If someone is positive for any of the illnesses, they will want to match through Dor Yesharim, and not have to tell any prospective shidduch that they’re positive and will need the other party to go to a lab.
This itself might be a legitimate reason for the policy, but in theory, the policy could have financial advantage.
December 6, 2013 2:08 pm at 2:08 pm #1141059☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantAlso, if you figured out someone else’s status, that means you have the same status, so why would you tell anyone?
December 6, 2013 7:15 pm at 7:15 pm #1141060writersoulParticipantPopa, DY: I don’t think that it’s a monopoly on purpose, but effectively it is one. If I decided on my own that I wanted to be tested by 23andme, bd”e (whatever I may think of the advisability of that), should I really not be able to be tested by Dor Yeshorim? Having whatever recessive gene should not be a stigma, but as it does seem to be one for some people and everyone wants to be tested for these diseases, you kind of HAVE to go through Dor Yeshorim, which prevents you from doing anything else beforehand. (Afterward, sure, but by then you’ve already used them…)
I’m not saying that they’re TRYING to have a monopoly, and their logic makes sense (once you come to terms with the fundamental assumptions about stigma), but it’s frustrating that there IS such a monopoly.
December 6, 2013 8:44 pm at 8:44 pm #1141061popa_bar_abbaParticipantDY, Writersoul,
I fail to see the monopoly issue that you are imagining.
You are saying that someone who is considering getting tested by someone else will not do so because if they are positive for something and they want to date someone who did dor yeshorim, then they will not be able to be re-tested by dor yeshorim, and that will convince them to not be tested by someone else to begin with.
However, people who are considering getting tested by someone besides dor yeshorim are not doing so with the intention to ever be retested by dor yeshorim, and are highly unlikely to know of this policy or to be considering it at all.
It is simply ridiculous to assume they are trying to target people whose intention was to be tested twice!!
Moreover, in your scenario the solution would have to be for the other person to be re-tested by an outside tester–which is a net loss of business to dor yeshorim, and the opposite of the intentions you ascribe. And this probably happens frequently, since people in the college world are generally tested by other organizations.
I changed my mind, you can go to a fake seminary after all.
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