Do Married Guys Do Laundry?

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Viewing 39 posts - 51 through 89 (of 89 total)
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  • #1074886
    anonymisss
    Participant

    MiddlePath, someone will be very lucky to have you as a husband one day.

    #1074887
    amichai
    Participant

    In our home, we all wash dishes, wash and fold laundry. why not? best chinuch there is.

    #1074888
    Imaofthree
    Participant

    when we were first married we did not have a washing machine so my husband used to bring the wash to the laundramat.

    #1074889
    Toi
    Participant

    you help if your wife needs it. though i believe this sis a bit one-sided, as ive never heard of a woman helping to shlepp succah boards. and i do cook and wash dishes ans sponge every darn week. its tough- but the smile makes it worth it.

    #1074890
    adorable
    Participant

    anonymisss- I have been telling Middlepath that for a while now. Now lets just wait for the day!

    I dont expect my husband to do laundry but why not wash dishes once in a while or clean up the toys….

    I have a couple of years though until I can ask him to do those chores.

    #1074892
    TheGoq
    Participant

    Bump of the day.

    #1074893
    MDG
    Participant

    Hi Goq,

    I still share the laundry responsibilities. I try to do more than my wife.

    #1074894
    R.T.
    Participant

    My wife will testify that the washing machine, dryer, dishwasher have become good reliable ‘friends’ of mine. I also scrub down the pots and pans, cooktop, crockpot, etc…, change diapers …

    #1074895
    TheGoq
    Participant

    Thank you MDG Hi! , good to know R.T. and WELCOME!

    #1074896

    “MiddlePath, someone will be very lucky to have you as a husband one day.”

    Agreed!

    #1074897
    uneeq
    Participant

    My wife doesn’t let me do any of the regular chores like washing dishes and doing laundry. However, I do the sponga every week (without being asked) and its considerably tough. I agree with those saying that some chores are women’s jobs and some are men’s. Basically, chores that women are more comfortable doing, women should be doing lekatchila and vice-versa. In a sha’as hadchak, you should obviously lend a hand.

    I think men’s jobs generally include taking out the garbage, fixing things, paying bills, and that’s aside for working really hard to be the bread winner of the family. Different situations obviously have different arrangements.

    #1074898
    eman
    Participant

    Not only do I do laundry, but each of my sons had to show me their capability of doing laundry.

    #1074899
    bpt
    Participant

    ” Bump of the day. “

    Always a pleasure to see old threads revived, GOQ. But its still not July / August, so for the moment, my answer is no, not usually.

    (but it is almost time to revive the bike riding threads!)

    #1074900
    MiddlePath
    Participant

    anonymisss and No One Mourns, thank you, I very much appreciate that.

    I don’t like the idea that there are chores considered “not for men”. It is a husband’s job to do anything for his wife to make her happy, and that would include any chore considered “not for men”. Obviously, if someone’s wife doesn’t want him to do a certain chore, then he shouldn’t.

    #1074901
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    I do laundry, as do all of my kids — of both genders.

    The Wolf

    #1074902

    MiddlePath, are there any clones of you around? More than one girl should be worthy of getting a husband like yourself! It’s so refreshing hearing you speak the way you do.

    #1074903
    Sam2
    Participant

    Is MiddlePath’s idea really that much of a Chiddush? I thought everyone took that as a Davar Pashut. Wow. I feel really bad for what has happened to us if it’s really considered something incredible to help out your wife if she needs it.

    #1074904
    MiddlePath
    Participant

    Thank you so much, keepingbusy. I’m sure there are plenty of wonderful guys out there.

    Sam, you’re right, it really should not be so surprising. I think just about everyone does think like this, but when such a situation actually takes place, some people suddenly decide that their own needs surpass the needs of their spouse.

    #1074905
    Loyal Jew
    Participant

    Before a husband does housework he should be matneh that it’s for chessed (which it is). Otherwise, it’s a reversal of gender roles, pas nisht and probably assur.

    #1074906

    @Loyal Jew

    “Before a husband does housework he should be matneh that it’s for chessed (which it is). Otherwise, it’s a reversal of gender roles, pas nisht and probably assur.”

    Then for the man not to work and for the woman to work, is also ossur, since that is most definitely a reversal of gender roles as well.

    Anyway, the way we do it, it’s pretty equal. Usually my wife puts the laundry in the machine and turns it on; I take it out and hang it. Then either of us takes it down and she folds it.

    Similar story in the kitchen: most often I cook, but she does the dishes.

    I see absolutely nothing wrong with that. I just hate folding laundry and doing dishes, so we’re pretty much equal in the house.

    I don’t even think I do very much at all. She spends more time cleaning the house than I do. Once we will have children ??”? I should be doing much more in the house – basically all of it!

    (By the way, we both work – I full time, she part time.)

    #1074907
    Loyal Jew
    Participant

    @Gatesheader — What non-working men did you mean? Not avreichim, I hope. They work plenty… A man who doesn’t learn *and* doesn’t work can’t solve that by “becoming” his wife and letting her “become” him r”l.

    #1074908
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    Before a husband does housework he should be matneh that it’s for chessed (which it is). Otherwise, it’s a reversal of gender roles, pas nisht and probably assur.

    Yet another proof that I am the lowest human being on the planet. I attempt to help my wife and, in fact, I’m committing a sin — spitting in God’s face, so to speak.

    I am the lowest, most vile person on the planet.

    The Wolf

    #1074909
    bygirl93
    Member

    they definitely should help!!! especially if their wife is working all day!!!

    #1074910
    bpt
    Participant

    ” I am the lowest, most vile person on the planet. “

    If you wear a snood and housecoat while doing the laundry, I might have to agree with you (extra sins earned if the snood covers your ears).

    Otherwise, relax. You’re in good company, Wolf.

    #1074911
    Sam2
    Participant

    Loyal Jew: Source that “reversing gender roles” is Assur please.

    #1074912
    BTGuy
    Participant

    No, since they never change anyway. lol

    #1074913

    @Loyal Jew

    “@Gatesheader — What non-working men did you mean? Not avreichim, I hope. They work plenty… A man who doesn’t learn *and* doesn’t work can’t solve that by “becoming” his wife and letting her “become” him r”l.”

    Yes, I was indeed talking about avreichim.

    OK, so, for the record, we disagree. We disagree now, we’ll disagree tomorrow, and probably forever. Let’s focus on other things now. 🙂

    #1074914
    beheimish
    Participant

    i have the solution….. GET A DISHWASHER!!!!

    #1074915
    apushatayid
    Participant

    On what setting in the dishwasher do you wash wrinkle free shirts?

    #1074916
    Loyal Jew
    Participant

    Sam2, my source is Ma’ase Bereishis, where Adam and Chava were told what their roles are. Of course we should help our wives, but as chessed, not as a reversal of roles. And Gatesheader, avreichim sustain the world. We “working” people exist by their zchus. You can disagree with me, but what about Chazal and the rabonim down to our times?

    #1074917
    Sam2
    Participant

    Loyal Jew: See Rashi Yoma 20b D”H Ee Tagras and you might have to rethink your definition of the “Issur of reversing gender roles”.

    Also, every working Talmid Chacham should be offended by what you said. Many of Chazal and a good number of Rishonim, Acharonim, and Poskim also had to have a job to support themselves and their families so that they could learn. They are M’kayeim the world just as much as someone who is fortunate enough to be able to afford to learn in Yeshivah/Kollel all day.

    #1074918
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    my source is Ma’ase Bereishis, where Adam and Chava were told what their roles are.

    Ah, so when I cook, not only is it a sin, but it’s also a reversal of the natural order of the world. That, if memory serves me correctly, was one of the tactics that Pharaoh used to try to destroy the Jewish people (assigned tasks traditionally associated with women to men and vice versa).

    So not only am I sinning by cooking, but I’m actually destroying the natural order of the world and following in the footsteps of one of the wickedest people in the history of the planet.

    I’m such a vile, despicable excuse for a human being. How is it that you people who live in Brooklyn haven’t come to my house to lynch me for my extreme rishus yet? I’m certainly a greater threat to the kedusha of your neighborhood than any TV, Internet site, or anything else you spend hours and hours harping on about. Or does “U’Viarta HaRa Mikirbecha” mean nothing to you?

    The Wolf

    #1074919
    bpt
    Participant

    “when I cook, not only is it a sin, but it’s also a reversal of the natural order of the world.”

    “How is it that you people who live in Brooklyn haven’t come to my house to lynch me for my extreme rishus yet?”

    Same rule the applies to laundry applies to cooking. As long as you don’t cross the snood / housecoat threshold, I’ll still vouch for you, Wolf (green meatballs included).

    #1074920
    writersoul
    Participant

    Where in the Torah does it say what Adam and Chava’s respective roles were? All it says is childbirth for Chava and working for Adam, if I remember correctly.

    So women working is really gender role switching min hatorah.

    #1074921
    OneOfMany
    Participant

    Loyal Jew = Joseph

    heads up

    #1074922
    R.T.
    Participant

    Hi LoyalJew: “where Adam and Chava were told what their roles are. Of course we should help our wives, but as chessed, not as a reversal of roles”

    So then, what are Bochurim/Bachelors doing by doing their own laundry, cooking their own meals, vacuuming the house? Does the “din” of the laundry machine change when a person gets married?

    It’s not a question of gender roles. If something needs to be done, and no one else is around to help out, the young man does it.

    #1074923
    avhaben
    Participant

    It says the Mitzrim forced us in a gender-reversal role. So the concept of defined gender-roles certainly is true. (What they are is a discussion for itself.)

    #1074924
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    So when you get married, suddenly everything that you had to do for yourself is entirely your wife’s job because she is a woman?

    #1074925
    Ex-CTLawyer
    Participant

    I was doing my own laundry before I married, why should I change? Our youngest is 18, so everyone in the family does their own laundry.

    I do the bed linens and wife does the table linens. We all have our own bathrooms, so we all do our own towels.

    Guest linen is usually done by the person who invited the guest(s) usually one of our daughters.

    I cook, and youngest daughter does the dishes (I do the heavy pots) Mrs. shouldn’t have to damage her nails doing dishes (and at her age she can have long natural nails).

    The cleaning lady cleans and the gardener takes care of the yard. I vacuum and take care of pool chemicals, as well as maintain the hot tub.

Viewing 39 posts - 51 through 89 (of 89 total)
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