What Length??
The first time I heard it, my ears hurt
Perhaps I was misunderstanding?
Were they mispronouncing a letter?
It soon became clearer and clearer
That teens everywhere really meant it!
Elegant, classy, and tasteful skirt-lengths
Are simply old and fermented.
Protecting with honor and strength
Has sadly become most abhorrent;
But the horrible way that it sounds!
Is once-standard class that repulsive?
Would anyone buy a new lipstick
Would anyone try on a jacket
So why would a girl try that skirt nowadays
And bury this label forever
The length that so closely protects you
And keeps us all safe and secure
Must lose its unseemly derision
I challenge each one of you out there
Even you – with the cynical smirk
To think up a flattering title
The girl or the woman who sends in
The length-name which earns the most votes
Wins $250 in cash
Sponsored by me (and some folks)!
(contest ended June 15)