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maybe you can ask him how he feels about diabetes, dont say you have it and see his reaction and then ask him how he would feel if his wife would have it. lots of times most people are ignorant and dont know too much. just as a side point i know a few married people that have it , one person just had her 7 child and they are all fine and another person has 3 adorable kids with no problems so you can have a normal life and healthy kids too!!!
I have a suggestion. Bear in mind I’m not someone with Diabetes, but how about instead of telling them or asking them, because it makes it seem having this illness is a chesoron and you’re asking permission, you make a comment- “Oh I have to go inject myself with insulin now” (even if you use the pump), or “You know, I try to stay away from candy, cakes, whatever (if you do), because I have to watch my blood sugar- so the next time I take it, it shouldn’t be too high”.
health… i like that idea i just don’t want him to think i’m tricking him or something…. i don’t know how he will feel about me saying sokmething like that but it’s a great suggestion thank you!
mosh- i really like that idea i think that’s what i’ll do because if he reacts badly i don’t have to mention that i have it i cld jst be curious… but what if he is fine with that (which i hope he will be…) i should just say.. “oh because i have it”? and btw thank you for telling me about the people u know i have always been nervous abt the children aspect and it makes me feel better to hear what you said so thank you!!
should i just tell him the story of how i was diagnosed without anything before? i am really nervous…
I’ve never had to tell a date yet so i can just tell u what i think might work..ive never done it yet! I wld probably bring it up more towards the mid of the date cuz u dont wanna start off with it..and u dont wanna end off with it either cuz he’ll probably have a ton of questions.. Maybe say that there’s something u have to tell him and then spill the beans he’ll prob be shocked and wont know what to say (which is normal) then maybe tell him the whole story about how u got diagnosed ..(my story is quiete intersting) then tell him what its like to live with type 1. that ur NORMAL ..etc.. dont forget to tell him that u try to keep it quiet and he shld only discuss it with whoever he needs to.. and if u dont want the shadchan to know in case they might not redt u anyone else tell him that too!
Hatzlacha! and dont forget to tell us when u get engaged iyh!!!! 🙂
i ended up not telling him because during the date i realized that he is not for me so there was no point in telling him when i knew it wasn’t going to go further. but thanks everyone for their advice! i feel better for the next one!!
Smart decision!
The right one at the right time iy’h!!
btw I hope all of us 20 yr olds are not forgetting to daven for eachother! Maybe we shld all say a certain perek every day for all of us. Anyone know which perek is for shidduchim?
i don’t know but i like that idea…. keep me posted on which
one(s) to say and i’m in!
You can count me in too!
I wasnt able to find out which perekim are for zivugim so how about if we each say perek chaf (20) and kuf lamed (130) everyday with everyone who needs shidduchim in this forum in mind 🙂
May we share in simchos very soon!!
sounds perfect! thanks so much!
Great!
It’s 2am and I’m 324! that’s after a full correction 2 hrs ago! The past few days have been similar. I’ve changed my infusion set multiple times, opened a new bottle of insulin… I don’t know what to do next:-( Any advice??
i’ve had that before when i was sick… it’s a horrible feeling i’m sorry!! stay calm! maybe check for keatones. the problem is that once the body registers that there is insulin there it will absorb it all at once so don’t keep giving full correction and be ready for it to drop low…. what i always do is call my doctors… diabetes doc to ask how to get it down safely (because every time is different for me…) and my regular doctor because i know i am sick and i ALWAYS right.. diabetics have a way of knowning their body… i know its frustrating i’m sorry i can’t be of real help! hope you feel better! keepp me posted!
I don’t think I’m coming down with anything… I took a correction by syringe, by 6 I was 51… My problem starts once I starts eating, we’ll see what happens today… If it still presists I think I really should call my doc, I hardly ever call him and haven’t been there in a while…
Its amazing how much it takes to make up for one missing hormone!
Forever1 -You need to go see your doc today, whether it persists or not!
i think you should see your doctor just to make sure all is ok in general! i go every 3 months religiously….
i think about what you said about a lot of work for one little hormone all the time. to me it shows the Wonders of Hashem because it takes us so much longer and more work to do what Hashem does in a tiny drop and it makes me appreciate when little things go right when we don’t even think twice about it…it’s really amazing!!!
I called and he agreed with me that it’s probably a bad batch of insulin, I ordered new ones, hopefully this will solve the problem…Don’t worry, I do visit him regularly.
cofeefan: absolutely, that’s what I was referring to, it’s a true eyeopener for how much to be thankful for!! I appreciate your advice btw.
Looks like i missed a lot of action here while i was at work lol. I have that situation every couple of months, I usually have to adjust my lantus (in ur case basal rate I think). And then i swing right back. The only other cause has been a bad insulin pen. Usually it happened after my pen spent too much time in the heat. I bought this great pen cooler from frio. It keeps the insulin at room temp! i use it all summer.
You certainly did! I didn’t know I was gonna cause such a stir, was just looking for a place to vent at 2 am, I appreciate all your support though. bh #’s are better. I guess calling my doc helped (is that Murphy’s law??) I promise I didn’t do anything different from yesterday!
That bring me to my next question, how often do you visit your endo and how often do you call for advice?
i go every 3 months like she tells me to (i have to make appointments 6 months in advance so i have 2 appointments set up always……)
i never call her for advice because she never calls back i am really frustrated about that thats the one thing i dont like about my doctor. if i need her i email her and she gets back to me in like 3 days so if theres ever an emergency i’m basically on my own…..
lol cofeefan sounds familiar…if i ever needa switch my appointment i have to call like 2 months before! (if i have to switch it last minute i obviously didnt know that 2 month ago..duh?) I go every three months but last time my doc told me that i can wait 4 months cuz everything looked bh gr8!
At my old place (pediatrics) I could wait 10 months or more for an appointment! and a refill took 2 weeks plus numerous phone calls and mistakes till they got it right.
the current place is rather small so the service is great. My doc is very easy to reach though I don’t call too often…
ok so here is my new issue…. i changed my exercising from mornings to nights and now i wake up with lows EVERY night… i changed my basal rates and even go to bed with a highs because i know it will drop but without fail every “morning” at around 4-6 am i wake up with BSLs in the 60s or less!!! my doc has told me that exercise effect the blood sugar a few hours after exercise and we had it figured out for when i do exercise in he mornings ( i wouldn’t bolus as much for lunch etc…..) and so i did all theh changings for night but it won’t work i keep having lows and i ‘m tired of it…(and literally tired because i can’t fall back to sleep afterwards….) i emailed my doc but it will take her a while to get back to me……..any suggestions on how to fix it??????
my only suggestion is to reduce your basals even more, abt 3 hrs before you go low, maybe try reducing by .05/hr (thats what i usually do) starting midnight till abt 5. exercise usually doesn’t effect me hrs later, only while I’m working out. let us know how it goes!
What kind of exercise do you do? I havent been good with exercise at all lately between school and work but I used to brisk walk for 45 minutes a night and it didnt really affect my sugars during the night..I had overall good numbers throught the day and night but i didnt see any particular changes.
The only form of exercise that really makes a difference for me is swimming! whew I cld eat a whole meal without having to give any insulin after i swim.
allsgr8- thats what i do i swim 3 times a week for 30 minutes and the days i dont swim i do the tredmil for 40 minutes. my basals r really low at night now.. i disconnect my pump for 30 min after (and for the time i exercise) ad drink juice before and it’s not helping! i would switch back to the morning but i am starting work again so it doesnt fit into my schedule like that.. and i don’t want to not exercise at all ( i lost almost 10 pounds over the summer….)
Ahh! so then it does make sense…Like i said before im not on the pump ….so i dont really know what to tell you! In my case I wld probably have to drink juice before i go to bed bec I dont have the flexibility of switching basal hour by hour..Could you try to exercise earlier in the night like around 630 rather than later? mayb that’ll help.
Wait, i just thought of another thing, u mentioned that u lost almost 10 pounds that cld make a difference in the amount of insulin you need! (both basal and bolus) I think u should speak to ur doc!
when I started exercising my total daily dose went down 40%! needless to say I needed to do a lot of tweaking. as allgr8 mentioned both my basals and insulin to carb changed. I couldn’t have done it w/o my doc though. You can try (if you haven’t yet) eating a snack before bed but that would be for the mean time only, your doses definitely needs some adjustments.
Love the feeling when lowering my TDD, I have a bit of an obsession with it, I check that screen daily:o
thanks you are both right i prob need a lot less insulin now… i emailed my doc i jst have to wait… (it gets me very annoyed that i have to wait so long for a reply but thats a different story…) until i hear from her i’m gonna try a snack or juice before bed i don’t like to do that really because it’s not so healthy but i’d rather get this issue resolved…. thanks for your help.. i never knew anyone else my age (only a lot younger…) that has diabetes so it’s nice to get opinions from people who know exactly how it is!
Hey, I don’t really know how to join this conversation, but I wanna. 🙂 I have diabetes too. I am in shidduchim, though barely anything comes of that. SO I guess I’ll just say hi for now…
Welcome BOSD!! Tell us about yourself please. Are you a male or female, how old, how long have you had diabetes for? is it type 1-I assume so if your in shidduchim now. And btw when you say “barely anything comes of that” do you mean that you havent dated a lot or that your diabetes doesnt affect ur shidduchim? Again, Welcome here and so glad u joined!
welcome BOSD… it’s good to “meet” new people. the best way to join the conversation is to tell us about yourself, how you feel about your diabetes, any struggles you have, any helpful hints that we can benefit from etc…. looking forward to hearing from you…
wow 52 is really low… do you know what caused it to drop so low?
how are you feeling now?
oy! Do u suppose there is any specific reason for the low or does it happen to u occasionally?
Cfn -I posted this before -coffee will drop your numbers. Get off coffee and you won’t have so many problems.
Thanks for the welcome folks. I am female, currently in shidduchim, and what I meant by nothing coming out of it is that it doesnt really matter how many guys you go out with or how many shadchanim you meet, if the end result is still being single. 😉
Anyhow, I have diabetes for ten years now, and I must admit, I am completely burnt out from it. That’s kind of why I am here. A friend pointed this thread out to me, and I hope reading and posting here will help motivate me. Cuz my former excellent control is down in the dumps right now.
And, btw, health, I dunno if it does that for everyone. I know different people have different reactions from coffee. It’s important to see how things affect you individually.
wow mod 72 that is low but not so low. my son once went down to 22 and boy was i scared, we called his ped who btw is great dr bulmash and he came running over and told my son to eat some winkies (they are great and in a few minutes his sugar climbed up. for member bosd i really feel bad and i hope you find your bashert soon. i know 2 girls who are in their 30’s and just got engaged. i never thought it would happen and yes it is so possible to be fet up and disgusted with this whole parsha
health- what did we discuss abt making generalizations??? coffee happens to be like any other food for me.. as long as i bolus properly for the milk (i use splenda so no carbs in that) there is no affect on my sugars….. but thanks for caring =)
BOSD-while i can’t exactly feel your frustrations with the shidduch world since i have only been in it for a few years i certinly understand when you say you are fed up with diabetes… i have it for 9 years and i can’t tell you how many times i feel like saying.. “that’s it i don’t care” and just giving up! there have been times (and i’m embarassed to admit it) that i ate whatever i want and stopped giving insulin because i really didn’t care… (that lasted about 2 days because feeling horrible wasn’t worth it….) but i know exactly how it feels and it’s frustrating… and my doctor said it’s COMPLETELY normal! when someone has a chronic disease it’s only expected that they feel like whats the use… as long as we realize that it’s something that has to be done and get back on track…. i jst think that of all the terrible nisyonos Hashem could give BH this is something i can deal with so then i get grateful…..
Mosh – I know Max before he was a doc – a real good guy.
Coffeefan- Just a suggestion what I said before -if you’re having problems now, why not try it?
Coffee fan, I’ve had diabetes for ten years, also “only” been in shidduchim for a couple of years. And I know that it is completely normal, but I could still use some advice in how to pull myself out of it…
Diabetes burnout or shidduchim burnout- which is worse? (Hmm, I think I should write a blog post about it…)
C’mon guys I cant believe ur talking like that! Listen, we all know that shidduchim isnt an easy thing but we also know that the father above who made our parents meet will also find a way for us to meet our bashert..more or less dates doesnt matter all we need is one right guy to come along. But in the mean time enjoy ur single status because once u get married life brings on a lot more responsibilities, u cant just pick up with ur friends and go on vacation or out to dinner.. think about the pretty side of life instead of the depressing side… And then about the diabetes part, now that could be rough- I only have diabetes for close to three years now so maybe i didnt reach the burnt out stage yet but when i find myself slacking off and feeling discoursaged I try to remind myslef of all the ppl who wish that this was there illness and not something much worse. I also tell myself that every time i check my numbers i get a mitzvah of v’nishmartem me’od…
We’re all here to help eachother so just keep venting and growing from it! 🙂
Health- coffee has no impact on my BGL btw!
Hey all you out there! you guys gave me a lot of reading to do;) I’ve posted way back and haven’t been here for a while, just thought I’d check it out and I see I’ve missed out on a lot! It was great reading up and being able to know exactly how ur feeling and all… So here’s my intro: I have type 1 for almost 2 yrs(one thing I’ll tell u-it’s been a LONG two yrs!!!!)I’m also about 20yrs…
Can’t wait to follow up and stay in touch! I think the best thing for anyone going through this is SUPPORT from others going through the same thing. there’s NOTHING like it!(as most of u prob noticed by now!)
lol BOSD- when you find some advice let me know!!!!!!!! we’re all in this together i guess!! i honestly don’t know what to tell you because i am going through that same thing myself! btw what do you do about telling the boy before a date?
health- i’m sorry if i sounded harsh i appreciate the advice!! i actually stopped coffee for a few days recently just because of time etc and it didn’t really make a difference but it’s an interesting theory! thanks for trying! =)
Wow wow wow, I didn’t mean to come across as negative. I’m sorry if I did.
Here’s what I meant, pretty much: I know that diabetes is a unique challenge from Hashem. I’ve writtensome pretty positive posts about it in general, I don’t think I’m allowed to link to them, but you can try googling the name in my profile. Basically, diabetes has shaped me tremendously as a person and I can’t imagine life without it. At the same time, the daily grind of diabetes can be really tough. I was diagnosed at twelve: the age where I remember life without it, but just enough to be wistful and dreamy. I’ve lived basically my entire adult life with it and some times (especially a day like today when I correct a 214 and go UP to 344 O_O) I just want a break. Ultimately, however, I know that Hashem has my good in mind and I can’t complain.
Bout shidduchim, I think I’m more burnt out from the whole process and mindset of the community (ie shadchanim, “resumes,” etc) than the actual idea of shidduchim. I’m not really worried, I know Hashem will send my bashert when the time is right. It happens to be a little harder now than it used to be because the last of my single friends just got engaged….
Oh and I forgot to post the advice I got for telling a boy. I’ve actually not had much experience with it, but tue advice I got was to preface the blow by saying thatyou are only telling him now on the advice of your rabbomim. That way, he can’t get mad at you for withholding info…
If you are very uncomfortable with the idea you could ask someone to call beforehand and give the news for you, but the drawback of that is that if the date goes badly you told him for nothing…
Also, I’m wondering if anyone has tried SOS tassis? I have a lot of thoughts on that…some good, some bad- not sure what I feel about it…
BOSD: i can’t speak for anyone else ut i for one did not think you were negative….. we’re all friends here!! what is SOS tasis? i never heard of it! i like your idea about saying a rov told not to tell about the diabetes it’s a good idea thanks! (btw i HATE when BSLs go up after correcting.. it is the most annoying thing!!!)
allsgr8- i think your attitude towards life is really amazing and i relly have a lot to learn from you so thank you for being so positive!! you make very good points and it really helps!
simchaallthetime-i agree with you about the support i for one am sooooo much happier to know other “people” who 100% understand me and how i feel!!
BOSD- i guess were even cuz im sorry if i came across harsh…i totally did not mean to!! sorry again!
About the last friend getting engaged..ye it could be tough im pretty much going thru that too now..one of my last friends just got engaged and all the rest just told me theyre expecting lol 🙂
Ur advise about telling boys sounds good but when do u tell them? is it after the 3rd date like most of us were told to say or do u wait till later on in the game?
Also, do u keep ur condition a secret or is it something that ur friends (and shadchanim) know about?
Simchaalthetime- welcome back! Glad u rejoined! 🙂
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