- This topic has 24 replies, 20 voices, and was last updated 12 years, 9 months ago by .
-
Posts
-
My friend comes up with the most random sayings,and claims that they are pure genius. I happen to think that they are god aweful, and to prove it to him Im setting up this thread so that i can hear your opinions. Here are two of his made up sayings:
“The only difference between a wise man and an ignorent man, is luck.”
“The most important skill is luck.”
Please post your honest opinion.
I’m smelling some fresh trollhouse cookies being baked here.
by the way it should be g-d awful, but then again what kind of thing is that to say everything hashem does is a blessing.
And you don’t even see the deleted ones. Turtle: You’re pretty close to a time out.
Here’s a good one I just heard- maybe your freind will like it:
Observe the 11th commandment- do unto others before they do onto you.
Here’s mine:
Misery loves company, don’t be the company!
Aries I like it- can I be the misery?
I hope its not rude to say that there is something funny about misspelling the word ignorant.
The Goq – Correct, Rule #1 applies here. TurtleBurglar is a one day old poster. Indeed “something smells fishy”.
Hi TurtleBurglar.
I am not sure if those quotes are “pure” genius, or even genius at all, but regarding luck, the quote, “Luck is when preparation meets opportunity” is a good line.
I always liked the quote, “If your nose runs and your feet smell, you are upside down.”
And the fact that it is nonsense, and it works so beautifully, makes it pure genius.
Seems more like a bored high school guy to me.
MIB – The reason why I say so is, the Location, Interests, and he hasn’t posted on any thread that a _ _ _ wouldn’t know what its talking about…
“Live and learn. Almost die, and learn even faster.” Just heard this one today. 🙂
“Planned? Planned?! You don’t plan sincerity… You gotta make it up on the spot!”
“A word for a coin,and silence for two” (Megilla 18)
“Even if your wife is short bend down and whisper to her”(ask her advice)- Bava Metzia 59
“One coin in a pitcher makes a lot of noise,but a pitcher full with coins is quite (Bava Metzia 85) I like these.
MIB – I Have to take the blame I guess.
The ten commandments are not multiple choice
I don’t know what makes you so dumb, but it really works
For peace of mind, resign as general manager of the universe
Square meals often make round people
Ignore your teeth and they’ll go away
G-d put me into this world to accomplish a certain number of things; right now, I’m so far behind, that I’ll never die!
Flying is the second greatest thrill to man;landing is the first
Criticism is what you get when you have everything else
Is this already a saying, since i dont know if my friend really made this up. She says she never heard it before>:)
“Life tastes best when served chilled”
“Why do you stay in prison when the door is wide open? “
The Wolf
Here’s one I saw this morning: The reason why grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is because they have a common enemy!!
Another good one: Knowledge is knowing that tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad!
Wonderful Definitions
Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.
School: A place where Papa pays and son plays.
Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die rich.
Nurse: A person who wakes you up to give you sleeping pills.
Marriage: It’s an agreement in which a man loses his Bachelor degree and a woman gains her Masters.
Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.
Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through “the minds of either”.
Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.
Father: A banker provided by nature.
Boss: Someone who is early when you are late, and late when you are early.
Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.
Classics: Books, which people praise, but do not read.
Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouths.
Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
RE Experience:
“The amount of experience gained is proportional to the amount of equipment destroyed.”
“Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you wanted.”
RE Committees:
“None of us is as dumb as all of us.”
Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow..
“speak when your mad and ull make the best speech u’ll ever regret”
the only way to learn is from your mistakes. but life is too short to make all the mistakes, so learn from others mistakes.
Remember: in the street they still think we’re a normal family.
this is the one that comes in about 2 X a day:
“you never know till you try it”
– Bad decisions make good stories
– There is a great need for sarcasm font
– Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died
– I think the freezer deserves a light as well
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.