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A comment on another thread got me thinking about staying for bentching at weddings. I honestly don’t remember the last time I stayed to the very end – it’s been years. That made me curious – how often do you stay for bentching at a wedding? Do you remember the last time you stayed?
If its on a Sunday Afternoon I will stay. If its on a weeknight wedding I will never stay. They end too late for people who work.
By time bentching comes around at literally every one of the very many weddings I was still at, the crowd (of men) was not significantly more than a minyan or two. So, clearly, relatively not many people stay till bentching.
I stayed for bentching at my childrens’ chassanas but for very few others. One that I did stay for we had to count the photographer for the minyon.
Since the halacha is to stay, I usually stay. I do recall one in recent memory where I didn’t stay. I received permission from the host to leave early.
My rule of thumb. If I got the invitation because the baalei simcha want me there (my siblings, close freinds) then I will stay until after sheva brachos. If I got the invitation because the baalei simcha feel they must invite me out of some social obligation, such as a (not so close) neighbor, some guy in shul who believes my name is good shabbos, a co-worker or I’m invited because I’m the other half of the mr and mrs, they I go for the chuppa, dance a little with the baal simcha and leave. He was yotze and I was yotze. Such a pathetic way to look at things, but its what works best for me.
Like your username WHITEberry LOL +1+1+1
I always try to stay. I don’t always succeed.
I’ve seen that at some chasunah’s they announce that they will bentch after the main course. Then people stay.
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