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kapusta – you do that so well!
SaysMe – we’re here!
We were put together for a while and after a while i opened up, then we had opportunity to get close and build a relationship. It takes me a long time to open up to others… I’m not quite a social butterfly…
ANYHOW. Blabla, haven’t heard from you in a while. How are you doing?
Hi guys, I’ve decided to come back for now. I’m so sorry for just picking up and leaving, it was very rude of me. I’m going to try to develop a more positive experience here.
SaysMe, I’m so sorry for what you have been going through with your friend. But as others have said, when one support system leaves, another comes and replaces it, sometimes even stronger than before. We may have to look and put in effort to find that support, but when we do find it, it is well worth the effort. And know that you are never alone. It is wonderful that you play piano to calm yourself down and express your emotions. I do the same with guitar. It is a great thing. But yes, aside from that, writing is a terrific way to express yourself, and thankfully, there is a solid group of wonderful people here just waiting to help and give encouragement, as I’ve seen from scrolling through the posts in the past week. Stay strong, and keep writing and playing piano!
Syag and kapusta, thanks so much for keeping this thread going lately, you are both amazing. Keep it up!
Think first, thanks for your message on the parsha, it is very inspiring!
yentingyenta, that is a beautiful poem! I’m sure your friends greatly appreciated it.
blabla, PE, observanteen, hope you are all doing alright.
**blush**
I need a soul with whom to talk
I know ur out there
I want a soul with whom to walk
I know ur out there
Ill raise u when ur down
Wipe away all ur frowns
You know ill always be near
To wash away ur tears
I want to care for you day and night
Always peaceful never a fight
Become one soul like the will of the creater
I hope it’ll be sooner that later
Hashem please hear my cries
For in it ur will lies
For me to be totaly complete
No more half a soul incomplete
When will it be I truly don’t know
So for now I’m on the go
Moving along with a prayer in my heart
Waiting for a fresh new start
I know u know what’s best for me
Its for the good even if it is hard to see
Ill hold strong waiting for the day
When ill feel whole and sing and say:
Thank you Hashem for sending ill say with glee
A wonderful partner who’s meant for me
Together well grow and learn ur ways
And accomplish our mission in life, this maze
Thank you all for taking the time
To go ahead and read my rhyme
I feel better already before I even hit “send post”
Encouragement is what matters most
May all ur worries turn to gold
And may U never fit “the mold”
Ur unique in every which way
And Hashem has given u another day
May we all be Gebenched! Amen
kapusta – you do that so well!
Hmm? What did I do, I’ll do it again. Thank you 🙂
Thank you, MP.
SaysMe, even though this is the poetry thread, use it for regular writing just to talk. I hope today was a little easier.
nope,it wasn’t at all. Know that stage where pain turns to anger or indifference? Day starting off fine, but all came crashing down. I found someone in a very bad mood and angry at me, and i have no clue what set that off. I tried helping someone else and got into an argument. I try helping
myself and fight or fall. It all keeps blowing up in my face. Then when i was down i got into another argument, and this time got upset and ‘hit’ back. Low then lower, when my friend didn’t get my downness, i just turned off and snapped back. Lovely end to a lovely day no? Yup, here comes my sarcasm full force! And my least favorte recording is starting to play in the background of my mind, whispering quietly ”who cares?!”
SaysMe, I’m sorry for your rough day yesterday. A good thing we can do is look back at everything that happened and try to see what caused that anger, or how the frustration came about, and be able to spot it in the future before anything happens. Also, from personal experience, I can say that a bad day leads into a good day. The way we go higher is by pushing down. So the bad days are the days that we push down, but after that, we can use those experiences to go even higher. Hope today is much better!
Think first, that’s a beautiful poem, and you have a wonderful attitude! G-d will send you the right one at the right time, and may the right one deserve such a great person like you.
mp-i do know what caused the argument,but i’m not willing to staand idly by if it comes up again.
I read ur post in welcome wagon. A late welcome back, and thanks for returning.
The Club
A long time ago (at least three weeks past), I was happy and content
I suppose I should have felt good for her, but our friendship had been purloined
I still would see my friend around, (though not as often as before)
Her happiness was clear to all, since she passed thru that magic door.
She was still my friend, the one with whom I could relax and simply just be me,
But every now and then a look would cross her face, her discomfort plain to see
Whatever was going on behind that door which to me was always barred?
What happiness was I being turned back from by the ever present guard?
Then just yesterday, I heard my friend, speaking to a fellow member of the club
The subject of their talk was me, quickly I pricked up my ears
Was I the subject of gossip now, this would confirm my worst fears
Instead, what I heard was my true dear friend, talking earnestly and low
Doing what she could to get me in the club, I felt my heart begin to glow
It is a happy and joyous place to be, and they wanted to have me, too
We are all only human, and from feeling left out (at times) no one is immune
SaysMe–
Thank you.
“The Club” is for you – I hope things look up.
PrincessEagle–
Thank you.
(honestly, my stuff is strictly “amateur hour”)
I care. And many others on this thread do as well.
I’m sorry yesterday was hard, I hope today is a better day.
*hug*
Thanks, SaysMe. And like kapusta said, I hope today is a better day.
ICOT, that poem was really touching. It really shows the loyalty of true friendship. Also, it shows how some things may look negative to us, but really, they are positive. We should try to see everything that happens in a positive way, and pass favorable judgement on everyone.
ICOT wow, thank you so much. That described it soooo well. (Except i’m not feeling left out, and my joining the club won’t reunite us. she’s moving away.) You described true friendship so well, and the emotions…
MP and kapusta- thank you
think first- sorry i’m not in the mood for a good reply. But that poem was so up and encouraging, while showing yearning and bitachon. What a beautiful positive tefillah!
Thanks MP and SaysMe. ICOT the club poem was awsome! Really enjoyed it.
ICOT, that was great!
SaysMe–
Thank you.
Think first-
Thank you – to return the compliment, yours was very good.
MiddlePath-
Kapusta-
Thank you for the kind words.
blabla–
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SaysMe – i’ve nothing new to say, but just for a good measure i’ll repeat…. I hope you know by now that you’re in no way a bad friend!!! A friend getting engaged can be very tough!!!! Whilst it’s true that life continues after ones married (!!!) it doesn’t happen in the exact same way, and it should be that way for the newlyweds. i just hope it gets easier for you.. worrying about what will happen doesn’t usually work.
What you commented before shabbos, about tears, i was told that you can cry on shabbos if its in prayer….if that’s any comfort! How are you feeling today?
That’s so amazing that you can play the piano!! I think music is the nicest way of expressing!
Writing, like Kapusta/you say, when down def. makes the feelings intense, and living through it again. It’s so often not worth it!! You’re not alone on that one! Although it can be worth it anyway, like, not only is it expression but it also helps you to see what you are really feeling, etc.
Kapusta, you really enjoy cleaning?!
Think First, that is really something….may G-d send us all the right one in the right time, and may the right time be very soon!! You’ve painted the picture in a very true way.
ICOT, it’s really good!!!! you write so well 😉 (don’t we all like to hear that again?!)
yentingyenta – those are nice letters! It’s good to be able to write!
Middlepath: Hi!!
But thats what poetry is all about! I’ve described myself in both male and female pronouns in my poems here.
I will definitely try keeping up the friendship. Being in different time zones though will make things difficult. It will be a big adjustment from our nightly 5 minute shiur together. And very difficult emotionally. And losing my support system in emotion, ruchniyus, and direction in daily struggle and conflict is gonna leave me much more vulnerable to falling.
PE- Thank you so much for telling me abt crying on Shabbos! I DID need to hear that!! to know that!! thank you thank you!
SaysMe, i’m so glad! I was also so relived when i heard that. Obviously if you care to you may have to ask it as your own question, that was just my answer!
About losing a friend – you’re so right. Perhaps try to hold on to hope. Belief that things CAN change and get better and easier. Belief that you WILL manage after the wedding, He won’t let you go!!! Hold on tight….
I’m okay…thanks for asking. Just struggling a little with my parents, food, and academics (can’t concentrate).
so good to hear from you! glad things are okay. As for concentration, oh booyyyyyyy can i relate right now! :p
Kapusta, you really enjoy cleaning?!
Definitely not in the top three fun activities but not always terrible. Making a mess is lots of fun though. 😉
(Some people do clean for pleasure or just as a way to get rid of stress which I definitely get.)
PE, hi!
blabla, glad to have you back!
“Some people do clean for pleasure or just as a way to get rid of stress which I definitely get.”
I’m definitely in that category. I love washing dishes, it is so relaxing!
SaysMe- I hope today was a little easier. Just wanted to mention that the “just engaged” and around the time she gets married will probably be the hardest. Things do settle down though and will get easier. Different timezones are just that but such a close friendship is likely here to stay. No matter what. Keep going, you’re doing great. 🙂
Good Shabbos
SaysMe–
I hope things work out well for you.
Is it possible that once things calm down after the chassuna you can resume your seder over the phone (even if it’s not every night)?
PrincessEagle–
Thank you, again.
blabla–
“Struggling” isn’t quite as good as “going smoothly”, but it’s infinitely better than “giving up”.
B”H you’re OK – keep it up.
lost and alone,
drowning in the sea,
stuck in this place,
no chance to be me.
I want to erupt,
destroy my own soul,
I need to do something,
to fill my deep hole.
alone in the classroom,
no support in sight,
I hold on for deer life,
to survive this lesson I fight.
nobody else in this room,
knows what hell means,
ignorant and blissful,
that’s what it seems.
I dig my teeth down,
bite into my skin,
cuz I want to cut,
to prick with a pin.
crying inside,
hiding it from the rest,
pretending I’m fine,
when I receive my failed test.
a looser, I’m doomed,
forever defeated,
I continue to drown,
till death is completed.
Having a hard time right now-REALLY hard time. And I wrote this poem when I wanted to cut but was in school and didn’t have a knife.
Bla bla so sorry ur having it hard now. Ur an inspiration to me that’s all I can say. You have lots of challenges and you do ur best. Somtimes ones best may not seem like much, but in reality its amazing how u pull urself together “one day at a time”. Hope this passes real soon.
blabla, I feel really bad about the hard times you are going through. You show your emotions and bring out your inner self in your poems so amazingly. You said in this poem
“stuck in this place,
no chance to be me.”.
That shows you truly have such incredible potential, and because of where you are currently holding, that potential is being tied down. But you DO have it in you. That is clear from all your beautiful poetry. You have an unbelievable amount of potential, and you can reach (and already do reach) amazing heights that most people can only dream of. Please keep strong, and one day, hopefully in the very near future, you will be in a place where your full potential can be reached, and all your talents and wonderful characteristics will burst forth, and everyone will see how amazing you are, and will want to be like you. That day will come! I have complete faith in you!
I honestly can’t tell you how amazing it is to get the support from here. I’ve been feeling down cuz I’m watching my classmates and kids from school hanging out with tonz of friends and having a blast and talking about movies and I feel so stupid cuz I don’t have many friends and don’t know too much about movies so I just feel like a big fat….um….NERD. I guess in truth I’m better this year socially than I was last year but whatever. Friday a teacher actually was mean…I burst out crying…so embarrassing. Okay I’m done my rambling 🙂
Houdini
The great magician smiled
As he stepped into his cell
Unadorned and simply tiled,
He just knew it would end well
His great skills barely tested
The door clanged shut behind him
He quickly got to work
The confidence which defined him
Apparent in his smirk
On his knees, next to the door
He got busy with his pick
Yet time went by and then some more
For the first time in several years
The magician had a doubt
Could this simple lock with so few gears
Keep him from getting out?
Hours later, in despair
He realized he would fail
His reputation left in disrepair
By a simple county jail
Beaten, he collapsed against the door
Feeling the full weight of defeat
But there was a surprise left (just one more)
That brought him leaping to his feet
It had moved slightly (to his shock)
The sly small town cop never turned his key
This story is supposedly true, although
The lesson I take from it is to know
You should never, ever despair
Obstacles, you may come across
Locked doors yielding and unkind
Some are only in our mind.
Icot that was really nice, and I also learn from here that sometimes we’re so focused on what we think must be done and in reality it may be something else entirely different and much simpler.
blabla, I don’t usually bother to look at this post as poetry ain’t my thing,
but what you wrote really touched me!
may u have much HATZLOCHO in all your endeavors , and have the strength to get through this test from Hashem called school!
ICOT, really nice poem! And a great message. Thanks for posting.
Think first–
Good point, I hadn’t thought of that.
MiddlePath–
Thank you.
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Error du jour: “yielding” in the last paragraph should obviously be “unyielding”. Edit!!!
blabla, how is it going today? Think first, Middlepath, ICOT you always answer so nicely – and blabla, i’ve not much more to add on to them. i hope it gets easier very soon. Crazybrit, it’s great to see you around this thread, how old are you?
ICOT, you’ve done an amazing job once again! Do you publish your work? You obviously don’t mind to share it here online, although it’s so public and is lost forever on the net.
SaysMe – how are you?
ill and out of order. Will return later.
blabla- keep going, we’re rootin’ for ya! #teamblabla
SaysMe- how’s everything? Thinking about you. 🙂
ICOT- great poem, as usual.
(Edit: SaysMe, your post just went up. Refuah Shelaimah!)
SaysMe – *triple hug and some hot tea*
It seems like:
everything that can go right,
goes wrong,
everyone that can like me,
hates me,
everything I can do well,
I mess up on,
everything I can pass,
I fail,
I GIVE UP. This is HELL! 🙁 Had a very rough day today…tomorrow back to school-no better.
PE, thanks! So do you!
SaysMe, get well soon!
blabla, sorry you had such a rough day :(. It’s difficult to be optimistic when things seem to be going bad, but it’s good to try anyway! Try focusing on the positive, even though it may be really hard, and hopefully with that mindset, you’ll start to see how you CAN do well, how things WILL go right for you, etc. It’s a difficult thing to do, to get into that mindset, but success is most easily achieved when we believe we can do it! And I believe you can!
blabla, please check your email.
Someone sent me this and I’d like to share it with all of my poetry friends:
The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.
SaysMe–
Refua shelaima.
PrincessEagle-
kapusta-
Thank you.
blabla–
Think first, thanks for posting that here, and I completely agree with it. And it can also help with dealing with difficulties, because we will be able to realize that going through these things make us stronger, and as you said, more beautiful people.
SaysMe, how are you feeling?
hi all. Thanks for the wishes. Feeling much better today, but still got a bit to go to being healthy. Yesterday was pretty bad physically, and emotionally. Got to talk to my friend last nite tho, and had a good talk and long cry on the phone. I hope my complaints didn’t insult her though, cuz i realized after i wasn’t being sensitive to her… She’s so good, andturned it around, instead apologizing to me. oh what a special friend she is!!!! I needed that rant, to get it out of my system. Hope i can now look for solutions… Back to the books now. I missed a ton of work that i have to make up and am slightly stressing about it. (yeah right).
Hope everyone else had a good day, and that noone else is on meds!
This is from Dr. Suess, personaly I think its gadlus.
You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.
You’re on your own and you what you know.
And YOU are the guy who will decide where you go.
SaysMe, glad you are feeling better. That’s wonderful that you had a good talk with your friend, and it’s great that you see what a special friend she is. Hope things are going alright.
Think first, thanks for sharing, that is very true.
blabla, how are you doing?
Thanks MP. Always something nice to say!
Think first, no problem, and thanks.
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