This morning on the front page of YWN there was a tragic story of a yeshiva bochur who drowned and there was a quote in the story
“Other talmidim and rabbonim describe the niftar as among the stronger talmidim in the yeshiva.”
Does it matter what kind of talmid he was? if he was an average or below average talmid would this be any less of a tragedy? whats the point of saying he was among the best? i really am curious to know what you think.
I don’t think praising the niftar minimizes any other tragedy. Sure, if the victim of a tragedy was not the best talmid, we wouldn’t talk about it, but if he was a serious learner, then it is part of the story, and mentioning it is a bit of a hesped.
I agree, Goq. It seems like that is supposed to make us feel worse. And it gives the impression that it might, ch”v, have been less of a tragedy if he wasn’t. I wonder, too, if the media does it because of the way we think, or if we think that way because the media does it.
Mainly, I think DY is right – there is obviously a point to praising a niftar: hesped.
But also: As far as the personal loss to families and friends, you are probably right. And yes, we should all try to feel another’s loss personally. But why isn’t the loss of a talented individual a greater tragedy for the community ? And its not limited to learning – I think you will just as easily find in such reports that the niftar was a great ba’al chesed etc.
as mentioned above, maybe a small hesped and to try to comfort the family in a small way. nothing will help the family now but to hear good things about your child brings slight comfort for a while.