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In the last few weeks, I had the distinct pleasure of being present at a 100th birthday party for an extended family member. This gentleman still lives at home (albeit with a home health aide to help him with some of the physical tasks) and has all his mental faculties. In fact, he even still works part-time. I certainly wish him a long(er) life with much health and happiness.
While there, I began to think about the traditional “Ad Meah V’Esrim” that people often wish other people. While I will grant it that many of us would be thrilled to reach 120, there also seems to be some limitations expressed therein. Which got me thinking: would you say this to someone who was 119? 118? I know that I wouldn’t. I would just wish them continued arichas yamim.
What do you think? Inquiring Wolfish minds want to know.
The Wolf
Good idea at 118 or 119. At 100, ad meah v’esrim still works.
A Nadvoner Einikel who has a Shtienel near me alway says Biz de 160. I never asked him where it comes from
I always wish Ad Meah V’esrim in good Gezunt. Otherwise, 120 years can seem like…well… 120 really BAD years.
I don’t know anyone who had that problem.
I know a rav, who when he passed 90, he asked people to wish him, “Biz Moshiach!”
I’ve recently heard of some choshuvah people who specifically don’t say it.
I always used to think that it was because Moshe lived until 120 and something like people can’t live past that. But one day it hit me that there were a number of people after Moshe who lived over 120 years.
Minhag Yisroel Torah, so I wonder what the mekor is.
I onc heard someone say 180 with inflation
Bereishis 6:3, also see Ibn Ezra there.
I was also present by a birthday party of someone just over 100 and I also thought how it may sound strange to wish him until 120.
When people would bentch my zaidy a”h (who was niftar at 92)with that brocha his response was “why are you limiting me?”
He didn’t even reach 120, so what limit? You know anyone recently who lived to 121 or older? Saying ad meah v’esrim is the way to go.
Next thread, please.
Wolf – Actually someone told me a funny story. A man made a kiddush in shul after davening for his 100th birthday. So this fellow went over to him and wished him – ad meyah viesrim. The old man looked at him with a face like, “Is that it!”
My father, bli ayin harah, is all spunk. When he was seventy years old (eighteen years ago), we went through a harrowing experience, as we watched his health suddenly go down, culminating with a succesful triple by-pass surgery. The first time I spoke to him after the surgery, he got on the phone, and weakly said “hello?”
Full of emotion at hearing his voice again, I said “How are you feeling?”
He weakly answered, “the doctor said I have a heart now like a baby”.
Again, overcome with emotion, I said “Baruch Hashem, Biz hundred un tzvontzig!”
To which he ROBUSTLY replied “The doctor just gave me until 140 – ALREADY you’re cutting off 20 years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Well, Moshe Rabeinu lived til 120, so that’s where we get the phrase, ad meah v’esrim. Scientists, with their purely scientific minds, say 120 years is the maximum lifespan of a person. It’s a bracha when you tell a person to live til 120. You’re basically telling them, you should have the max time possible to fulfil what you have to fulfill in this world.
hudi, I beg you to please think before you write. We get the phrase from a passuk in parshas Noach, 2qwerty already cited it. Also, who are these nameless scientists with their uncited claim? As far as I know, no country in the world has an average life expectancy above 83.
150 is the new 120.
Dear BP Zaideh,
I vaguely recall seeing a significance to the number 160. Please wait a while and I will look for the reference and get back to you. Googling it got me nowhere, I’ll have to try to remember.
I know of a rav who once wished an elderly man “until on hundred and twenty”, and the guy looked at him and said “that’s it?” So the rav said “ok, may you live until 180”, and the guy was satisfied. Now he says 180 to everyone.
Oomis suggested “I always wish Ad Meah V’esrim in good Gezunt”
DO YOU SPEAK FROM EXPERIENCE?
My 97 year old mother who has all her mental facilities plus B”H, but suffers the usual age related frailties such as hypertension etc,
is so afraid of being a burden that at times she asks Hashem for the unspeakable
Tonight is the wedding of a great grandchild.(all grandchildren are married)
Last night my Mother reported that she was not feeling the greatest all day, and added One thing I ask Ribono Shel Olam
“not for the next few days” do not disturb the Simcha.
Mother Shtichya is far from a burden. My widower brother eats supper (her cooking) with her every night. There is a great grandchild sleeping with her every night (in rotation) & until recently she changed the linen herself.
She is afraid of becoming a burden
In our family, once you b”h reach 60, we wish them “du zolst derleiben moshiach’n mit gezunt and nachas” – Loosely translated: you should merit to live to see Mashiach, with your health and nachas.
and b”h my 2 grandmothers lived to almost 100
littleeema
In that case, I’m going to start saying that… 😉
Wolf: I know it’s a weighted average, but those are the numbers that have been computed. AFAIK, no one has computed the maximum possible life span of a human being. Don’t we have a phd biostatistician in the forum? Why are we all — including me — shooting our mouths off? Let’s ask charliehall. And yes, it’s bereishis. I didn’t lein that shabbos, so I only remember chasan bereishis from that parsha.
Sorry ItcheSrulik! I should have known.
I learned about the lifespan in a gerontology class I took this past semester
The pasuk in Bereshis is NOT the source! It does not refer to human lifespan, rather to the impending mabul 120 years away.
The pasuk in Bereshis is NOT the source! It does not refer to human lifespan, rather to the impending mabul 120 years away.
thats according to rashi the eveen esra pshat its the life span of most ppl of afew.
A yid goes to an elder mans birthday, and walks up to him to say “ad mea ve’esrim” and right before he hears that the guy is turning 120 today. When its his turn he’s not sure what to say, so he says to the old man, “have a nice day”.
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