Home › Forums › Bais Medrash › A Shabbos Desecrator Saying Vayechulu With the Congregation
- This topic has 51 replies, 20 voices, and was last updated 12 years, 11 months ago by Avram in MD.
-
AuthorPosts
-
November 13, 2011 2:07 pm at 2:07 pm #600493WolfishMusingsParticipant
As per the Rambam (Hilchos Eidim — sorry I’m too lazy to look up the actual citation now), it is forbidden to join with a sinner to give testimony.
As most (all?) of you are probably aware, when the congregation says Vayechulu after the Amidah on Friday night, it is, in fact, giving testimony. That is why we require someone who would otherwise say it alone to find someone else to say it with him.
When I find myself in shul on Friday night, I sometimes consider NOT saying Vayechulu with them. I do this because they don’t know that I am a Sabbath desecrator (as per the OC and MB 288) and that my saying Vayechulu with them might be an issue of Lifnei Iver. I sometimes figure that it I skip saying with the congregation, their testimony would then be accepted by HKBH, whereas it would be rejected if I said it with them.
The Wolf
The Wolf
November 13, 2011 2:53 pm at 2:53 pm #835777Sam2ParticipantVayechulu is not real Eidus. You’re okay.
November 13, 2011 2:55 pm at 2:55 pm #835778soliekMember“The Wolf
The Wolf”
always knew he was a bit schizo 😛
November 13, 2011 4:10 pm at 4:10 pm #835779JotharMember288 is about fasting on shabbos. Even if you were bemeizid and beafrhesya it wouldn’t make you a mechallel shabbosm just a mevazeh shabbos
November 13, 2011 5:39 pm at 5:39 pm #835780ToiParticipantunless it was a tanis chalom. to op- be miyached eidim. exclude the bad guys. and chazon ish says its ok with one.
November 13, 2011 5:45 pm at 5:45 pm #835781Sam2ParticipantI think he means being sad.
November 13, 2011 8:41 pm at 8:41 pm #835782WolfishMusingsParticipantYes, Sam, you are correct. There’s more to the siman in SA than fasting.
The Wolf
November 13, 2011 8:44 pm at 8:44 pm #835783WolfishMusingsParticipantVayechulu is not real Eidus. You’re okay.
Of course it’s not *real* Eidus. But, nonetheless, we treat it as if it were (we stand, say it with 2+ people, etc.) that perhaps it might be subject to the Rambam’s prohibition.
The Wolf
November 13, 2011 8:47 pm at 8:47 pm #835784WolfishMusingsParticipantalways knew he was a bit schizo 😛
No, just a bad editor.
The Wolf
November 13, 2011 10:50 pm at 10:50 pm #835785☕️coffee addictParticipantWolf,
I thought this post was by pba
Anyways, so two krovim can’t say vayechooloo together?
November 14, 2011 5:46 am at 5:46 am #835786Sam2ParticipantWolf, we stand because it’s like Kedusha, and the Chumra of having to have 2+ people really makes very little sense. For starters, it can’t be Eidus. By definition it’s said at night.
November 14, 2011 8:13 am at 8:13 am #835787soliekMemberwolf…ever get the feeling that you have waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much time on your hands?
November 14, 2011 6:41 pm at 6:41 pm #835788kakoParticipantSo, you are concerned about “Lifnei Iver” but you are ok with being a Sabbath desecrator. Very very strange…
November 14, 2011 7:12 pm at 7:12 pm #835789YTLCMemberkako – I know it sounds strange, but please give people a chance… I have a relative who was chozair b’tshuva and then, c”v, went off the derech again… after he went off, my wife and I were at a Pesach seder with him, and he made sure to point out to us that either he got mevushal wine or wouldn’t touch the non-mevushal wine (can’t remember which), in order to avoid trouble for *us*.
November 14, 2011 8:20 pm at 8:20 pm #835790zaidy78ParticipantShould I say vayichulu if I’m davening in the same minyan as my father and/or brother?
November 14, 2011 9:16 pm at 9:16 pm #835791Derech HaMelechMemberI have not seen it inside, but it appears to be widely known that the Vilna Gaon was not makpid on saying it with someone.
November 14, 2011 11:41 pm at 11:41 pm #835792Sam2ParticipantIt’s a ridiculous Chumra. In fact, being Makpid on this Chumra should be an issue of looking like a Beis Din when it’s not because you can’t give Eidus at night.
November 15, 2011 3:05 am at 3:05 am #835793WolfishMusingsParticipantSo, you are concerned about “Lifnei Iver” but you are ok with being a Sabbath desecrator. Very very strange…
WHO TOLD YOU THAT I WAS OKAY WITH BEING A SHABBOS DESECRATOR??!!
It is what I am, and it pains me terribly that that’s the way I am, but I am certainly not “ok” with it.
And don’t just tell me to stop. It’s not easy. If you know a way to be happy on-demand, then by all means, go out and market it and I’ll buy it. But as things stand right now, I am often sad on Shabbos, with is a violation of Shabbos as outlined in OC and MB 288.
I have my faults, but don’t tell me that I’m “ok” with being a Shabbos violator. Am I wrong? Yes. I deserve all the punishments a Shabbos violator gets. But don’t tell me that I’m “ok” with it.
The Wolf
November 15, 2011 4:39 pm at 4:39 pm #835795kakoParticipantWolf: From the tone in your intial comment opening this thread there is no indication of your feeling of “it pains me terribly that that’s the way I am”. And I assumed (my fault) that “you were ok with it”.
From the tone in your last response I feel anger.
I apologize to you. It wasn’t my intention to hurt you in any way. Please be mochel me.
November 15, 2011 7:38 pm at 7:38 pm #835796MoodcheDoovidMemberMach kiddish on branfen before mincha. Yayin yesamach levav enosh.
November 16, 2011 4:27 am at 4:27 am #835797WolfishMusingsParticipantI apologize to you. It wasn’t my intention to hurt you in any way. Please be mochel me.
No need to apologize. It was my fault. I over-reacted to your post. It is I who should be asking forgiveness.
Mach kiddish on branfen before mincha. Yayin yesamach levav enosh.
Not this enosh. I rarely drink, and when I do, it’s very little. I’ve never been drunk in my life* and I don’t intend to start now.
The Wolf
* Yes, I know that means that I don’t fulfill the mitzvah of Ad D’lo Yadah. Just another example of how I am a sinner.
November 16, 2011 5:19 am at 5:19 am #835798popa_bar_abbaParticipantI wonder if Wolf will ever tell us what is behind this narishkeit he has.
It doesn’t seem like he does it for pure humor.
Other options include:
He uses these fake aveiros to justify feeling like a rasha so that he can do other ones? Unlikely.
He uses these fake aveiros so that nobody online can accuse him of real ones without the discussion turning to fake ones? Bizarre.
I have no idea. I can’t think of anything that makes sense.
Wolf, I will save you the time of responding to this, by saying for you:
“I wish that was the case. Unfortunately, I actually am a rasha, and am completely serious.”
Gut voch.
November 16, 2011 5:32 am at 5:32 am #835799Sam2ParticipantIf I recall correctly, Wolf got fed up with some of the more right-wing/Chareidi posters here who were spewing Naarishkeit and platitudes themselves without actually thinking about what they said or the situation and has decided to take it out on the CR in a satirical manner.
November 16, 2011 6:11 pm at 6:11 pm #835800bezalelParticipantFor starters, it can’t be Eidus. By definition it’s said at night.
It’s also something that I have no firsthand knowledge of.
November 16, 2011 7:05 pm at 7:05 pm #835801Sam2ParticipantBezalel, I think that’s the point of pretending it’s sort of an Eidus. We do know firsthand that HKBH created the world, even if we didn’t physically see it ourselves.
November 16, 2011 9:19 pm at 9:19 pm #835802adorableParticipantare you trying to change? your original post is rather horrifying to read
November 17, 2011 12:28 am at 12:28 am #835803Sam2ParticipantAdorable: Wolf is fine and quite a frum Jew. This is his form of satire (even though he will reply to this to deny it).
November 17, 2011 1:12 am at 1:12 am #835804popa_bar_abbaParticipantIf I recall correctly, Wolf got fed up with some of the more right-wing/Chareidi posters here who were spewing Naarishkeit and platitudes themselves without actually thinking about what they said or the situation and has decided to take it out on the CR in a satirical manner.
Hmmm. Can anyone find the post where he started? (I guess this is where having a resident stalker comes in handy.)
November 17, 2011 3:09 am at 3:09 am #835805david1999MemberWolf:
Look at the Chazon Ish on that Mishnah Berurah and you will see that no one agrees that there is an issue of eidus here only edah. Therefore, you can say it:)
November 17, 2011 4:20 am at 4:20 am #835806WolfishMusingsParticipantWolf, I will save you the time of responding to this, by saying for you:
“I wish that was the case. Unfortunately, I actually am a rasha, and am completely serious.”
Why is it so difficult to believe that, at the very least, I truly believe this?
This is his form of satire (even though he will reply to this to deny it).
I thank you, Sam, for trying to make me look good, but the reality of the situation is that I possess very good writing skills and a wicked (in the positive sense, pun intended) sense of humor. I am *very* capable of making my intentions clear when I intend to be humorous or satirical.
are you trying to change?
You cannot simply “wish yourself happy.” If I’m sad, then I’m said — and if that’s an issue of chillul Shabbos as per the SA and MB, then I am a mechallel Shabbos B’farhesya. Sad, but true.
Look at the Chazon Ish on that Mishnah Berurah and you will see that no one agrees that there is an issue of eidus here only edah. Therefore, you can say it:)
I will have to look that up. Thank you, David.
The Wolf
November 17, 2011 5:32 am at 5:32 am #835807passfanMemberWhat are you sad about (on Shabbos or whenever)?
November 17, 2011 5:55 am at 5:55 am #835808WolfishMusingsParticipantWhat are you sad about (on Shabbos or whenever)?
I often don’t know. But for the purposes of this thread, it doesn’t matter. There are specific reasons for which you are allowed to be sad on Shabbos, but none of those apply to my situation.
The Wolf
November 17, 2011 6:36 am at 6:36 am #835809bezalelParticipantWe do know firsthand that HKBH created the world, even if we didn’t physically see it ourselves.
Having evidence is not the same thing as firsthand knowledge.
November 17, 2011 2:14 pm at 2:14 pm #835810☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantBezalel,
When we know something with certainty, it’s called ??? ???? – Anan Sahadi – “we testify”. and can have the halachic status of eidus.
November 17, 2011 3:59 pm at 3:59 pm #835811Sam2ParticipantWolf, look there in Siman 288. If being sad makes you feel better then maybe it’s okay. Also, being sad wouldn’t make you a Mechalel Shabbos. You would be, at worst, Mevatel an Asei D’rabannan of Oneg.
November 17, 2011 3:59 pm at 3:59 pm #835812Sam2ParticipantWolf, look there in Siman 288. If being sad makes you feel better then maybe it’s okay. Also, being sad wouldn’t make you a Mechalel Shabbos. You would be, at worst, Mevatel an Asei D’rabannan of Oneg.
November 17, 2011 9:43 pm at 9:43 pm #835813Avram in MDParticipantWolfishMusings,
It is forbidden to have certain bodily functions occur while wearing tefillin… to the point that if a person has a GI ailment which makes it impossible to control the body in that manner, he is exempt from tefillin.
Now, if I heaven forbid had a chronic GI issue which prevented me from wearing tefillin, should I take myself to the doctor and get the illness treated, or should I come onto the CR and declare publicly that I’m a sinner because I don’t lay tefillin?
In other words, if your sadness is truly bothering you as you claim, and you feel distress at not being able to follow the halacha as you see it, shouldn’t you go and be seen by a health professional, rather than coming to the CR to make halacha look heartless, CV”S?
November 27, 2011 4:33 pm at 4:33 pm #835814WolfishMusingsParticipantI ended up speaking with someone about this situation. The summary outcome of our conversation was as follows:
1. A M’challel Shabbos is disqualified from giving testimony.
2. Someone who violates the Shabbos as outlined in SA, OC is a full-fledged Shabbos desecrator.
3. Someone disqualified from giving testimony should not join with the congregation.
4. In addition, a M’challel Shabbos causes any (non-M’vushal) wine he touches to become forbidden. As a result, I am not allowed to drink (non-M’vushal) wine, since the very act of picking it up causes it to become forbidden.
5. Likewise, anything a M’challel Shabbos cooks lacks Bishul Yisroel (unless a kosher Jew lights the fire, etc.). As a result, I am forbidden to eat anything that I cook since it lacks bishul yisroel.
All of this applies as long as I am in a state of depression on Shabbos. (Whether I’m in a state of depression the rest of the week is totally irrelevant to the present discussion.)
As far as Vay’chulu is concerned, I was presented with an easy solution — simply extend my Shmoneh Esrei so that I’m still davening when the congregation says VaY’chulu.
The Wolf
November 27, 2011 4:54 pm at 4:54 pm #835815Sam2ParticipantWolf: I believe Rav Schachter has mentioned that 4 and 5 shouldn’t be a problem. Those Gezeiros apply only for other people. If a Mechalel Shabbos B’farhesia himself makes food that he knows it Kosher (and touches wine that he knows he wasn’t Menasech) then he himself (and his immediate family, I think Rav Schachter said) are perfectly allowed to rely on themselves.
November 28, 2011 1:55 am at 1:55 am #835816WolfishMusingsParticipantWolf: I believe Rav Schachter has mentioned that 4 and 5 shouldn’t be a problem. Those Gezeiros apply only for other people. If a Mechalel Shabbos B’farhesia himself makes food that he knows it Kosher (and touches wine that he knows he wasn’t Menasech) then he himself (and his immediate family, I think Rav Schachter said) are perfectly allowed to rely on themselves.
A. I fail to see why I (or my family) should suddenly be exempt from the dinim of yayin nesech or bishul yisroel simply because I am the one who happens to be the sinner in question.
B. If I were to have a strict ruling from a right-wing rav and then someone were to suggest I follow a left-wing lenient ruling, I would be slammed by the right-wing members of this board so fast that my head would spin. Is it right, then, that I should now adopt a right-wing position that is lenient after having received a stricter ruling?
The Wolf
November 28, 2011 7:38 pm at 7:38 pm #835817Avram in MDParticipantWolfishMusings,
[in response to popa_bar_abba:] Why is it so difficult to believe that, at the very least, I truly believe this?
Because you’re smarter than this.
I ended up speaking with someone about this situation.
<rant>
Who, mosherose?
I’m not sure why your game bothers me so much. Maybe it’s because, in some areas (as far as I can determine through your posts), we think in similar ways. You seem to care about your beliefs being logically consistent and despise anti-intellectualism or fallacies. Yet in threads like this, your arguments are rife with blatant fallacies, including (in just this thread alone):
Sweeping generalizations (a dicto simpliciter ad dictum secundum quid – you ignore universally acceptable exceptions to rules). For example, if state law said, “entering into a private domicile without consent of the owner is illegal”, I can see you writing an OP saying “I deserve to go to jail because I entered into someone’s house without permission yesterday…by the way, I’m an EMT.” The funniest example of your use of this fallacy is your, “I’m a sinner because I talk during leining (I’m the ba’al koreh)” shtick. This mechalel Shabbos one’s not so funny, however, because it can add stress or misery to a person who is depressed, doesn’t see the fallacy in your argument, and might take you seriously.
Appeal to anonymous authority – “I ended up speaking with someone about this situation”, and somehow this random person becomes the final word, ignoring what everyone else said on this thread. Also apparent is that you likely did not give this person all of the relevant information, which is not in the spirit of ????????? ?????? ??? ?????? ????????
False dilemmas – either you’re never sad on Shabbos, or you are a mechalel Shabbos who cannot cook for other Jews or handle wine, or say vayechulu with the tzibbur. No different than saying that someone either supports all of the president’s policies, or he is a traitor.
So, as popa_bar_abba asked, what is behind your drive to take every generalization, apply it rigidly or absurdly to your personal situation to come up with faux aveiros (which is not how a rav would operate IRL), and then parade your “shame” publically in the CR? Are you trying to bait extreme posters like mosherose to give crazy responses so you can prove their ignorance or have fodder for your blog? Are you trying to make halacha and/or Orthodox Jews look bad? I can’t understand it. But really, given how much knowledge you obviously have of Jewish law and tradition, I can’t possibly accept that you are being serious with this.
</rant>
December 2, 2011 5:08 am at 5:08 am #835818WolfishMusingsParticipantAvram,
First of all, thank you for the well-thought out response (even if you did characterize it as a rant).
Your example of an EMT (by the way, did you know that I used to be an EMT?) is not really applicable since both halacha and New York State law would allow you to “trespass” on someone’s property to save their life. I’m not aware of anything that says that one is allowed to be sad on Shabbos just for sake of being sad.
I will admit that my “talking during laining” bit is a joke, but the rest of it is not. Nonetheless, for the sake of your argument of:
This mechalel Shabbos one’s not so funny, however, because it can add stress or misery to a person who is depressed, doesn’t see the fallacy in your argument, and might take you seriously.
I will say the following:
Any judgements I make apply to myself and myself only. For your own personal situation, please contact your local Orthodox Rabbi.
Also apparent is that you likely did not give this person all of the relevant information, which is not in the spirit of ????????? ?????? ??? ?????? ????????
I don’t know why you would assume that I didn’t give the person I spoke with the complete, unadulterated truth. I assure you that that’s not the case. Nonetheless, I stand by his ruling, as one does not go “p’sak shopping.”
Are you trying to bait extreme posters like mosherose to give crazy responses so you can prove their ignorance or have fodder for your blog?
No. You’ll notice that my blogging activity has dropped off considerably in the past year.
Are you trying to make halacha and/or Orthodox Jews look bad?
Absolutely not.
I can’t possibly accept that you are being serious with this.
I don’t see why you can’t accept that. Sometimes the simplest answer is, in fact, the true one.
The Wolf
December 3, 2011 11:31 pm at 11:31 pm #835819WolfishMusingsParticipantcome up with faux aveiros
Being sad on Shabbos is not a “faux aveirah.” It’s a very real prohibition as codified in the Shulchan Aruch OC and the Mishna B’rurah.
The Wolf
December 4, 2011 12:00 am at 12:00 am #835820ItcheSrulikMember1- Granted.
2- Not quite. One who does melacha on shabbos publicly is a shabbos desecrator.
3- Repeat, not quite. See ???? ????? compiled mostly from psakim of Rabbi Shlomo Zalman Auerbach. The custom is to count anyone without asking questions about ideological purity. (Otherwise you couldn’t find a minyan anywhere because in our time you can’t get 10 frum Jews to admit that the other nine aren’t heretics.)
4&5 – Not at all. People excluded from the community lack ??????, that is no one else can trust them that the food is kosher. Stam yenam and bishul yisrael are a penalty imposed on the sinner to exclude them from the community. None of these penalties were ever meant to apply to the individual himself, who knows the food is kosher. An example of this can be found in ?????? ?????? 8:8.
December 4, 2011 12:33 am at 12:33 am #835821InaSukkahMemberWolf:
Are you posting truly to discuss eidus, or are you asking for help with your sadness? Personally, I am finding that cultivating hakaras hatov as frequently as possible to be a good antidote. Also, I can’t believe that Hashem would create some of us to be more prone to sadness and then would punish us for not always overcoming it, Shabbos or anyday. I find it more helpful to focus on Avinu rather than Malkenu. I’m already good enough at self-flagellation. I don’t think that Hashem would be pleased with my strengthening it.
December 6, 2011 2:15 am at 2:15 am #835822ItcheSrulikMemberBump.
Wolf, I think you’d be interested in seeing the points Sam2, InaSukkah and I raised.
December 6, 2011 2:48 pm at 2:48 pm #835823Avram in MDParticipantWolfishMusings,
Thank you for responding.
Your example of an EMT (by the way, did you know that I used to be an EMT?) is not really applicable[…]
Didn’t know that… when I first typed the response I put policeman, but changed it to EMT to avoid the complications of a warrant, etc.
I’m not aware of anything that says that one is allowed to be sad on Shabbos just for sake of being sad.
That’s not the issue. If I tripped on Shabbos and fell against a wall with a light switch and accidentally turned the light on, am I a mechalel Shabbos? Oops, didn’t mean to do that… now I can’t say vayechulu with the tzibbur next Shabbos? No, because the melacha was involuntary. A mechalel Shabbos, on the other hand, does his aveiros on purpose. You, however, wrote in your response to kako above:
It is what I am, and it pains me terribly that that’s the way I am, but I am certainly not “ok” with it.
This indicates that your sadness is involuntary, which does NOT make you a mechalel Shabbos. It’s not like you wear torn clothes, fast, and wail in public on Shabbos [at least, I’m assuming you don’t!]. Involuntary sadness that affects your ability to accomplish what you want to is called depression, and if it is upsetting you this much, you should really speak to someone you trust, rather than publicly beating yourself up on the CR. I am affected emotionally by the change of seasons (likely due to the lack of sunlight), and sometimes when it’s really bad, I feel like I’m defective… like some grooves were dug into my brain that cause irrational sadness that other people don’t have. Because intellectually I know I don’t have anything to be sad about, yet I’m sad anyway. Then to make matters worse, my yetzer hara comes and tells me that I’m sinning, reminding me of the admonishment of a husband and father to not be melancholy, and so on top of sad, I feel like a bad person. That’s a trick that the yetzer hara plays, because if I feel like a sinner, then I stay sad. Now that I understand more about the physical causes of my feelings, my wife kicks me outside with my toddler in a stroller when there’s a lot of sunshine. I also try to take a walk during the day outside of the office. The extra sun exposure and exercise help with the sadness.
Any judgements I make apply to myself and myself only.
Are you saying that you’re different, somehow, from other Jews? A tzaddik who’s held to a higher standard? Again, I think this is possibly a trick of the yetzer hara.
I don’t know why you would assume that I didn’t give the person I spoke with the complete, unadulterated truth. I assure you that that’s not the case.
You told this person that you have had problems with feeling sad occasionally on Shabbos, even though you don’t want to be sad, and would like help to not feel sad, and s/he replied that you’re a sinner and should avoid saying vayechulu on Shabbos?? Sounds nuts to me.
Nonetheless, I stand by his ruling, as one does not go “p’sak shopping.”
You have not said that this person is your rav. I’d recommend getting rulings from your rav, and only after giving a full and accurate picture of your issue (e.g., not just saying, “R’ X, in theory, is someone who consistently violates a Shabbos prohibition in the S”A considered a mechalel Shabbos?” and so on).
No. You’ll notice that my blogging activity has dropped off considerably in the past year.
I have not read your blog enough to know much about your posting habits, but I have read enough to know that there you criticize what you see as craziness, and here you accept craziness and apply it to yourself.
December 6, 2011 3:00 pm at 3:00 pm #835824Avram in MDParticipantWolfishMusings,
If I may be so bold, if I were in your shoes, the question I would bring to my rav would be worded along the lines of:
Rav X, I am suffering from episodes of depression. I am very concerned with not letting this condition prevent me from properly honoring Shabbos. Do you have any recommendations for me to increase my simcha on Shabbos?
December 6, 2011 4:08 pm at 4:08 pm #835825popa_bar_abbaParticipant4. In addition, a M’challel Shabbos causes any (non-M’vushal) wine he touches to become forbidden. As a result, I am not allowed to drink (non-M’vushal) wine, since the very act of picking it up causes it to become forbidden.
This reminds me of when I was at a presentation on the halachos of being mafrish terumah and maaser, and the presenter was saying how if you don’t have a siddur, you can say, “I am being mafrish like it says to in the Artscroll siddur.” But, he quoted from someone that if you do that when you have a siddur, then you are an am haaretz.
So I wondered, if you are an am haaretz, then your food is d’mai. So then you still can’t eat it.
December 6, 2011 5:42 pm at 5:42 pm #835826soliekMemberi think youre overthinking all this…
-
AuthorPosts
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.