smartcookie, maybe this is why I am sensitive to the holier than thous, and the small minded people who jump to conclusions. A few years ago I frequented another frum blog. I was acquainted with the Rabbi who ran it and I joined because we were both working towards the same goals. At any rate it did not have a delayed posting with moderators, he believed in the honor system and had a “report this post” button.
At any rate, I was very, very involved because I was coaching and mentoring and as was the case there as is here, not everyone was in tune to helping the at-risk kids and many thought they were “bad” and “bums”, there were many who disagreed with me. On Friday afternoon, I had finished my preparations rather early and I was on the blog answering posts up until 10 minutes before lighting candles. Motzei shabbos when I turned on my computer and logged in I was shocked to find the holier than thous spouting all this loshon horah about me saying that you can’t listen to anything I say because I am not even frum or shomer shabbos. Look at the time I posted my last comments, it was way past the zman…yadah, yadah, yadah……
The attacks were so vicious the tears just started to flow. It took a good half hour before I gathered myself to answer. You see, I hibernate in Miami for the winter and the zman here is a good hour after that in New York. I was shocked that these people were so small minded that they assumed everyone on the blog lived in their “daled amos”. It was truly appalling. So I answered them and asked did they really think that the internet was only invented for New Yorkers? Did they really think that the website members only lived in New York? I happened to be in Miami and there happened to be members in Israel and all over the globe. What gave them the right to jump to such disgusting conclusions and say such loshon horah accusing me of not being frum and not being shomer shabbos. They started to back peddle and then say well if the blog is based in New York then you are not allowed to post when the blog is shut down…….
I was so terribly hurt that frum people would be so cruel and viscous it hit me to the core of my soul. That blog was not like this one, people just discussing, that was more of a help line. Other people started posting from Chicago and L.A. and then the Rabbi posted himself. On that blog I used my real name and not a screen name, so it was even more devastating. The Rabbi had a few choice words to say about what happened and of course vouched for my reputation.
So yes, I am sensitive to personal attacks probably because of that, and I am disgusted when people jump to conclusions and judge others for no reason. And this is probably one of the reasons. Everyone with an opinion thinks that they are right. But most people know when to back down and apologize, at least when to back off and stop.
It is truly a sad commentary when yidden just have to keep going at each other without reason, just because they want to be right. How important is being right when you are being hurtful to other people anonymously or not? Does it make a person feel good about themselves that they one-upped another person? Does it make them feel good that they got another shot it, or threw another dagger? Is that what Yiddishkeit is about? Not at my age. I know better.