Vogue, I really feel for you.
What Veltz M explained is true. There’s a lot of dishonesty and masquerading (not just on Purim) in “frum” society. There’s also a lot of emphasis placed on things that are silly and unimportant. The games played in shidduchim can be especially offensive.
It would be a terrible thing if all of this pushes you away from the strides you have taken to keep yourself from going off the derech.
“To thine own self be true.”
If you really are a straightforward person, then don’t feel, as Veltz M told you, that you’re out of luck. If this is who you are then be honest with yourself first. Concentrate on the parts of Yiddishkeit that are truly essential and that resonate in your heart. Focusing on what music you listen to is not one of the fundamentals of Yiddishkeit. Find meaning in serving your Creator to the best of your abilities, in caring for the Neshama within you, and in observing the Mitzvos, such as Shmiras Shabbos, that define you as a Jew. Try to find like-minded friends, and try to find it in your heart to forgive the people who want to box you into their idea of a nice bais yakov mold, and out of true fulfillment in being the good person you are.