WIY- if this wasn’t stressed enough is everyones posts, HES HUMAN!
If anything, there is still silver lining in this story. Whatever he did, he did. That doesnt mean that your life has to come crumbling down. He didn’t do it to hurt you specifically. You sincerely looked up to him and aspired to be like him. But you must recognize that it’s not possible. You must be yourself. Sometimes Hashem will send us this harsh message when we aspire to be like another person TOO much. “Mi hu chocom? Halomed Mikol Adam!”- Pirkei Avos, Perek 4. Who is wise? One who LEARNS from everyone! take the lessons you learned from this man and apply them to your life, but LEARN where to stop yourself. Just cuz he made a mistake doesn’t mean you have to, and you can still attempt to acheive a beautiful trait he emultes.