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I don’t want to keep hocking away at you but I honestly think someone who is holding where you are is taking a huge risk being here. There are many threads which go off topic and suddenly become about these kinds of questions. I have been here for too many years I know what happens here. I am not concerned for myself about these threads because I’ve already read many articles and books that discuss these topics as well as listened to many lectures about it. But for most young teens these threads are poison. You have no right to play games with this. You wouldn’t take such risks with your money or your health why would you risk your neshama your eternity so flippantly?