It turned out that after class the day I was thrown out, the boy sitting next to me went to the “Rebbe” and admitted that he had been talking, not me. So why was I outside? Because I told the Rebbe I hadn’t been talking, and he felt that was chutzpa, to contradict him in front of the class.”
Feif Un, that similar scenarioo happened to my son in 5th grade (almost put him off love of learning, btw). He was thrown out of class for talking during davening. Anyone who knows my son at all, knows that davening is of extreme chashivus to him, so much so, that he NEVER talked during tefila. The boy in back of him was nudging him, and he turned back to motion (not even say) “SHAH!” That’s what the rebbie saw. He would not even allow my son to explain that he was not doing anything wrong. L’hefech!
Even when the boy who WAS talking and bothering him IMMEDIATELY stepped up and admitted my son had done no wrong and it was entirely his fault, the rebbie still threw my son out (not the other boy, who btw is a wonderful young man), and called my husband and me in to see him the next day.
We are not the type of parents who always think their precious yingeleh is perfect, so we asked our son what happened, and got his side of the story. When we saw the rebbie the next day, we reserved judgment until after he told us his version of the events. We were non-confrontational, but asked him if it was true that the other boy confessed. he looked confused for a moment then mumbled something or other. I asked him if he had ever noted my son doing anything other than davening while davening (the school year was almost over, btw). He admitted he had not. I asked him if my son had ever given him any reason that entire year, to think he was not machshiv his davening. He said he had not. I asked him if he was aware of how important davening is to our son? I further asked him if he believed that throwing my son out of class for almost two days without benefit of hearing his side, or seriously listening to exculpatory evidence, in any way made him a better Yeshivah bochur. He had the grace to admit he had been wrong. I told him that he needs to believe us when we tell him that we would not countenance any misbehavior, especially during davening, but that he also needs to believe my son when he says that he does not talk during davening. Especially when the guilty party comes forward.
My son never enjoyed fifth grade Limudei Kodesh much. If he were a different type of boy, this could have chalilah given him a really sour taste at a most crucial stage in his development. B”H he knew we supported him fully, but he also knew that if and when he ever DID do something he shouldn’t, we would have a very different approach. Thankfully, that has not happened too often.