Tlik: you are a very good advocate for these boys. But may i add that the problems run much deeper than that. I believe its a community problem where most of our yeshivos and schools belong to a mosdos or communal group that want their students and later their parentbody/ community to have a certain mehus and mehalech. These are future representatives of said mosdos.
Another thing is that by taking away individuality they have more control over their community and everyone follows whatever goes on blindly. Because thats how they were trained from young. I tkink that it is usually the kid that has problems conforming to the mold that run the risk of being different.
When we as a community realize that hashem created us as individuals to serve a common purpose that is when we will be able to be secure in the knowledge that we are not turning anyone away.