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superme- i’m sorry if i came across harshly. I feel for you. I’ve seen these things happen and experienced them, and i am not thinking you did anything wrong or didnt respect him! Only that he might feel that way even if not at all true. I do think he was incorrect, but as other posters explained he may be insecure or had a bad day, etc. I agree that an apology to you is in order, but you cant force him to say it or feel it. You are allowed to be upset and hurt. My point was to go back after the situation has blown over n calmed down on both sides, and then apologize calmly, again if it be. Its terrible that he insulted you when you came to apologize, he was obviously still upset about whatever had upset him, or else on defence realizing his error. But try again.
Abt your friends telling, even if you asked or dragged it out of them, its actually rechilus, and here the effect was seen- you are angry and bearing a grudge :(.
Speaking to that other rav is still a good idea. If anything, he wll respect you for wanting to fiz this up in a proper way. Gluck!!