“i had actually done something about it but it hadnt worked, and i was really working on it.”
sounds to me like she did try. hard. and yet, even when we try, we do fail sometimes, don’t we?
Yes a breach in tznius can affect other people too. (though we don’t know if any men saw OP-it was a woman who commented). Speaking loshon hora also affects people, and we cannot say which is the worse aveira. Can you expect ppl to always be able to stop themselves and never fall? You can hope, but if we didn’t have these struggles, and falls, what would be the purpose in life, no? (NOT trying to get into that discussion 🙂
For some ppl tznius is easy, and not they’re area of challenge. Some cannot understand the challenge even. But it is there for others! and we can’t blame them for needing to work on something. Only commend them for recognizing this struggle, and working on it!