I know precisely what you were objecting to. And I stand by it.
Men who look at pornography are not suffering from an addiction. Therefore, any anti-addictive cures are stupid, useless, and probably harmful. Using the 12 step program to fight something which is not an addiction is retarded.
I define addiction as when you do something for reasons other than the regular reason. So for example, if you drink because you like getting drunk, then you are not addicted. But if you drink because you emotionally need to get drunk, that is an addiction. If you overeat because you like food, that is not an addiction. If you overeat because you emotionally need to, that is an addiction.
You might like my definition, and you might not. Psychologists can’t really agree on a definition, but mine seems fairly rational, and a well regarded frum psychologist agreed with me when I discussed it with her.
But, under no definition of addiction is the exercise of a normal desire–an addiction. Looking at pornography is a normal and healthy desire–albeit assur. If your husband was eating pig at night on the computer–you would call a rav, not a 12 step program. If he was eating pig every night on the computer, you would still call a rav–not Pigaholics Anonymous. Of course, if he was neglecting his relationships and your kids, and going to bed at 3AM every night (not once in while) to get his fix of pig, that would sound more like an addiction.