Bustercrown , you are most definitely not alone, there are many women in your situation.
Really important to realise the difference between men and women and also the even bigger difference between the man you care for and respect and the inappropriate behaviour you have discovered.
To make a marriage work chemistry is need, both for frienship and marital relations, if you recognise you have that chemistry you can both make it work, but be open and honest, not with your friends or family but with your spouse. Deceit and lies create far more problems than looking at inappropriate stuff on the internet, sure it is wrong to visit inappropriate sites, but the lies and deceit needed to get to them undermine marriage, not a few adult clips or images. With gentleness and respect for yourself first work out how to approach the man you love about this matter, then approach him. Rabbonim and therapists can help, but the desire for shalom bayis is something that needs to be established first.
Nice frum jewish girls are taught to behave with modesty but once married we should remember the importance of attraction and chemistry. Your husband does not love you less, this is about furtive thrill seeking . Recognise men are humanbeing created by Hashem to have different needs to us, recognise your marriage for what it is and can be and work with him. A woman no less than a man is entitled to a fulfilling marriage based on trust and honesty, alongside chemistry. All three can be worked on in a marriage, in fact later on this could be a turning point which could lead to a long term happier marriage and relationship.
Above all else, be discreet and selective in whom you confide, marriages can be warped by ill considered advice and confidantes.