“It is statements like the ones you made that divided the klal from their rabbonim. It assumes that the internet user would have been oiver issurim in his or her regular internet use, which is not true.”
You are assuming that they aren’t oiver every single click unless something bad comes up but every click is a sakana, the overall lifestyle of using a computer that way is a sakana for something bad to eventually happen. It is a ticking time bomb and therefore you are oiver by putting yourself at its eventual mercy.
Think of it like yichud, you can me meyacheid with somebody and not actually do any issur with her but you were still oiver on putting yourself into a makom sakana. The issur isn’t just the act itself, there is an additional issur of lo sikrivu. A yirei shamayim should realize this and therefore understand that even the “muttar” Internet use is an issur here.
“It is also absurd to think that the person will use the delay time to pontificate each and every time a server request is made (maybe once, maybe 10 times, but after that its just a nuisance).”
Of course they won’t think about this during every millisecond of every delay but the overall mindset should be that the extra tircha is well worth it. I try to think of it this way, every year the speed of computers and connections goes up, just a few years ago we were ecstatic to have even half the speed we have now, so just have patience and understand that it isn’t “that bad” to have to go through the extra bit of tircha. It might take some getting used to but eventually you get used to it and it becomes just part of the experience, a minor annoyance. Computers give us minor annoyances all the time, it freezes up for a few seconds, you frantically move the mouse around for 5 SECONDS while you go crazy thinking the world is about to end. We live in a fast paced world and people really need to take a step back and practice some savlanus.
(I have this same issue with drivers, people are in such a rush, changing lanes, honking horns, and what does it save them? Maybe if they’re lucky it will shave 30 seconds off a 10 minute drive. It’s really not that big of a deal in the long run. This mindset is what causes people to text and answer calls while driving. I was driving with someone the other day, we were less than 2 minutes from our destination and his cell phone rings. He made such a big deal of getting it out and answering as if the world would end if he missed the call and put us in sakana in the process. The proper thing to do would have been to just ignore the call and called the person back 2 minutes later. 2 minutes is not that long! It’s not the end of the world. Savlanut!)