I was raised more modern and I saw some of the sheltered girls sneaking as you said. Decades ago I had an ‘argument’ with some teens about the way they were raised and told them I would NEVER raise my kids that way. My answer wasn’t to raise them less sheltered, I told these girls that I plan on raising them sheltered from things that will harm their neshomo, and TEACH them about it.
Instead of “keeping them away” from stuff like nick, jr., I will teach them why someone with a pure neshomo would rather take a pass on it. I understand that you were focusing on the issue of making educated choices, but I feel that there is a missing option. Shelter them by TEACHING them a choice, not an exposure. You can serve them cookies and then tell your kids why they would not want to choose it as a breakfast food. Or you can serve them healthy food and tell them how beneficial it is, AS OPPOSED to eating cookies for breakfast.
You can teach them the beauty of life with purity of heart and eyes, and let them make the choice of exposure when they are old enough to sneak. Once you present the t.v. show as a “choice”, you are telling them that “mommy said it’s okay, it’s just not real healthy for your neshomo”, otherwise why would you have presented it? If it REALLY was potentially harmful, their mother would never have offered it.
Not sure if I am making sense. It is super hard to condense a lifelong process into a paragraph.