Aside from the short-term complications and added expense of flying to date and IY”H make a wedding, the constant who goes where for yom tov, and who gets to see the couple/grandchildren more can cause a LOT of friction in a family. I have seen it time and again.
A more “real” factor is that the mindset of an “out of towner” is very different from a New Yorker and there are many who can’t handle the cultural differences. And anyone who tries to deny that these differences exist is oblivious.