miritchka -“I understand that a BY or Yeshiva may hold its not a good idea to go to college. But in this day and age, when most men and women have to work to pay the bills, wouldnt a good yeshiva or BY teach and engrave the middos and hashkafos that the girl/boy should have to be able to go to college or at work.”
No, that’s your fundamental mistake -they HOLD it’s Ossur to go to college, nothing to do with good or bad idea!
“To my knowledge, a BY or yeshiva is there to teachtorah, to teach middos, to teach how to behave when they do leave the BY/Yeshiva setting. Not to dictate.”
Yes to all of the above, but they dictate when they teach Torah.
So they will dictate to those in their schools -that it’s Ossur to go to college!