Health: to answer the points you made:
-I understand that a BY or Yeshiva may hold its not a good idea to go to college. But in this day and age, when most men and women have to work to pay the bills, wouldnt a good yeshiva or BY teach and engrave the middos and hashkafos that the girl/boy should have to be able to go to college or at work.
-To my knowledge, a BY or yeshiva is there to teachtorah, to teach middos, to teach how to behave when they do leave the BY/Yeshiva setting. Not to dictate. If one goes to a chassidish school, say the gerrer (sp?) yeshiva, yes there they teach one specific way of life. But your average BY, say Bais Yaakov of BP, its for all types of frum girls. I dont know if I’m making sense, do you understand what i mean?